Round the Tubes: Crown and Links Edition

Posted: February 27, 2013 by veeshir in Drunkblogging, Hotassery, Obama's Fault, PEBKAC

I started a jug of Crown a little while ago. Let’s see what happens!

First up, What’s the Wash Post going to do? We all saw Woodward calling Obama insane and then the White House going all Chicago on him. I’d be a little more supportive of Woodward if the Wash Post wasn’t such a facilitator of Obama’s lies.

I wonder if the Wash Post will grow a pair, but notice the above links do not go there. I’m betting against it, this is just a little fillip and they’ll be back to kneeling and bobbing by tomorrow.

A couple IMAO links,

Hillary is going on the speaking circuit! I’m not saying she won’t be paid well for it, I’m just wondering if anybody will actually show up to listen to her smugly screech.

I just noticed that I did the post the other day about the 1911 knives without the link. I guess nobody wanted one, but there it is anyway.

A little history lesson (I love this one)

Original-assault-rifle

Funny how that worked out.

Speaking of which, the NY boycott is up to 97 businesses. I will say that I love it when a blogger finds an important niche and does good. I hope his hit count is way up there.

The war between the states is getting funnier and endier.  Texas is running $billions in surpluses, Illinois is running $billions in deficits. How long before Obama raids  tries to raid Texan coffers for the Illinois welfare state with hilariously violent results?

Well this is unsettling.  Supposedly Hezbollah is fighting in Syria for the gov’t. So another set of jihadis added to that dog’s breakfast. The truck bomb war is going to heat up.

China threatening Japan, the Philippines and Vietnam. Yay! They’re moving missiles across the South China Sea.

Wow, whiskey makes me laconic! Good thing I wasn’t drinking vodka.

A couple of chucklers from the List of What Global Worming Hath Wrought!

From 11/15/08, Will Global Worming Cause Ohio to lose buckeye trees? (spoiler alert: No)

From 6/29/2005, Global Worming Will Make The Earth Lopsided! A little trouble though:

We used computer-generated simulations to get this research result,” Powell cautioned.

Let me know how that worked out for you.

Wyatt had a post that made me look for funny air traffic controller stories and I found this page with a bunch of new ones.

There are the ones you might have seen on an email on the right sidebar, but the main part of the page has stories this guy knows.

Unknown Aircraft: “Hello?..”
Easterwood Tower (me): “Please say again.”
UA: “What?”
ET: “Who is this?”
UA: “This is Joe”
ET: “This is Easterwood Tower, where are you?”
UA: “I’m in the plane!”
(I looked down the flight line, checking if someone was sitting in a parked plane playing with the radio. I didn’t see anything, and the senior controller was becoming more interested in my handling of the situation.)
ET: “Joe, where is the pilot?”
UA: “He got out when the engine quit..”
(I could only imagine a bizarre scenario in which the pilot had jumped from the plane.)
ET: “Joe, what does your airspeed indicator read?”
UA: (Long pause) “Zero?”
(So the plane was now in a stall I thought.)
ET: “Joe, whatever you have in front of you – a stick or a steering wheel – push it forward – you need to get airspeed over your wings!”
UA: “Are you sure?”
ET: “Yes Joe you need to push it forward… (pause)… What does your airspeed indicator read now?”
UA: “It’s still zero.”
(I thought, oh my god, Joe’s plane was in a falling leaf spin. I couldn’t help him. Joe was going to die. I did not know what to do. I looked to the senior controller. He said, “Ask him where his plane is.”)
ET: “Joe, where is your plane?”
UA: “We are parked down at the end of the runway, the pilot got out when the engine quit and walked back to the hanger..”
ET: “Joe, get off the radio.”

Okay, that’s funny.  I can picture the poor air traffic controller thinking he’s talking to a dead man.

This one slayed me even though you can see it coming.

The late Captain Mickey Munn – an all-round fine fellow, highly experienced pilot and, at the time, Sergeant in the Red Devils (UK Parachute Regiment display team) – was piloting a Britten Norman Islander to jumping altitude with a full load of hairy-arsed paras crammed into the rear of the aircraft. With no warning at all, a bang and a flash of flame, the port engine blew itself to pieces. Mickey’s hands flashed around the cockpit as he brought the aircraft under control. As soon as the aircraft was straight and level he turned to his passengers and said: “Phew. I think you chaps should…” But his words tailed away as he gaped at the empty passenger cabin.

See ya, wouldn’t want to be ya.

One more

And (another) hoary old chestnut: QANTAS pilot to copilot landing at Sydney, forgetting the cabin intercom was live:

“What I need now is a cold beer and a hot shiela”
Stewardess hurries forward lest worse befall.
Chorus of passengers “Hey, you forgot the beer!”

There are a bunch, none are bad, some are fucking hilarious. Look at the “Technical problem/remedial action” chart at the bottom.

Technical problem                                                                                    remedial action

Dead bugs on windshield.                                                                     Live bugs on back order.

I have some great bookmarks on this computer that I haven’t clicked in years.

I think I’ve posted this before, but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t post it again.

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Comments
  1. SOYLENT GREEN says:

    Since this idea addresses 2A, boycotts AND !!!Global Warming!!!, I thought you’d find it amusing–if not brilliant.

    http://sonofsoylentgreen.wordpress.com/2013/02/27/inspired-madness-cut-off-sales-of-fossil-fuel-to-government/

  2. Nicole says:

    Oh, sure. Now you post a link to the knife gun. I had to google that all on my own…

    • veeshir says:

      Sorry.

      Are you getting one?

      I edited this comment, it came out ruder than I intended.

      • Nicole says:

        They are pretty neat looking. But we’ve been buying gun-guns lately. And ammo. So no budget for one at the moment. And my comment could be seen as pretty rude as well. Wasn’t intended that way. Just teasing. ;)

        • veeshir says:

          That’s how I took it. I wrote, “Gee, too bad there isn’t some way you could have told me the link wasn’t there.”

          But, as I said, it came out rude so I won’t write that.

          • Nicole says:

            Oh, I thought about asking for the link. But then I says to myself “Self, Veeshir isn’t your Google. Get off yer lazy ass and go look for it.” :)

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