Archive for the ‘Government FAIL’ Category

I’m starting to wonder if Romney wanted to win

Posted: May 9, 2013 by aliceaitch in GOP FAIL, Government FAIL, Islam - a religion of tolerance and peace, Mideast Madness
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We’ve got the Project Orca disaster that has already been covered to pieces (with the exception of maybe mentioning that Romney’s staff was informed beforehand, emphatically, by at least one Republican county chair here in Colorado that the names of the pollwatchers absolutely had to be sent to the county chairs to be sent to the county clerk for certification), and now we have a powerful ad about the Benghazi slaughter that was pulled because it wasn’t about the economy.

The ad is even more haunting considering foreign service officer Gregory Hicks testified that he failed to answer his phone because he didn’t recognize the number on caller ID. Not that it would have made a lick of difference how quickly he answered his phone since there was no intention on the part of our federal government to send aid to our consulate.

I’m feeling like Romney did everything he could to throw the election short of giving a donkey a blowjob on national television.

Round The Tubes: We’ll See If I Can Do It! Edition

Posted: March 19, 2013 by veeshir in Democratic morality, Fun with Elections, Funniest End of Civilization Evah, Government FAIL, Mideast Madness, Nanny State, Notes on the Revolution, Obama's Fault, You'll pry 'em from my cold dead hands
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It’s an interesting day, (insert smug recitation of Chinese curse thing) so let’s start with the most interesting.

Let’s start with a GIF from me to you.

upton

We’ve all seen accusations flying at Syria over using chemical weapons, I take that with a grain of salt, but I have to say that they did it. Why?

“Terrorists fired rockets containing chemical materials on Khan al-Assal in Aleppo province, and preliminary information suggests 15 people were killed, mostly civilians,” the state news agency SANA and Syrian state television said.

He who smelt it, dealt it.

I could be wrong, but if jihadis had chemical weapons they would have used them on Israel long before now.

Now they’ve crossed the line that Obama done drew. (an artist’s conception, accurate until the last line)

In the 70s we saw the Arafish and his PLO terrorists start a civil war in Lebanon between Muslims and Christians, but they’ve cowed the Christians mostly so what’s a murderous group of religion of peacers to do?

Ayyad, the Shiite cleric, denied the accusation and said the men who beat the Sunni sheikhs were “uncontrollable” youth known for troublemaking.

Now it’s between Sunni and Shiite, just as Allah intended.

Now this is very interesting. Supposedly Cyprus is rescinding the “We’re gonna take your money” deal.

IMF head Christine Lagarde, speaking at a financial conference in Germany, added her voice to the chorus of backtracking.

I wonder, was it the riots or Tsar Putin I? I know which way I’m betting, and it ain’t on Teh Peepul, it is EUnuchstan after all.

Two “Fuck You Harry Reid” links.

First, he’s blaming the deaths of Marines in a training exercise on the Sequester. You know, fuck you Nevada. This man has said so many despicable things over the last 10 years that I no longer blame him, I blame the mother fucking assholes who vote for Mr. We’ve Lost The Iraq War. I saw this everywhere but on Drudge first.

Here’s Reid saying something stupid about a budget.

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid warned Monday that a failure to quickly finish up a 2013 stopgap spending bill could restrict the time that senators have to battle it out over the 2014 budget resolution later this week.

So once again we see the problems of not having a budget are causing them to not have a budget.

It’s like a vicious circle only it accuses me of being stupid.

Okay, this looks like good news, but it ain’t.

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid has decided that a proposed assault weapons ban won’t be part of a gun control bill

You know they’re going to do the “sensible” gun laws (like universal background checks), McCain, Graham and the rest need to be able to say, “We got rid of the stupid bill and kept this sensible one.”

Fuck you. That’s all I have to say about that, I’m thinking more shit but I’m not ready to write that yet.

Speaking of common sense chains, via Bob Owens we see this bit of hilarity. The Connecticut governor has some proposed things that would have stopped that crazed shooter in CT.

There was also enough consensus among the commission members to recommend bans on high-capacity magazines and the possession, sale or transfer or guns — both military-style firearms and handguns — that are capable of firing more than 10 rounds of ammunition without reloading.

First, the guy stole the guns so no laws except one that mandates going back a thousand years or more and making it so nobody ever discovers gunpowder would have stopped that, as for the mag ban, he would have taken about 9 extra seconds to load two more mags.

It’s just CT pols dancing in the blood of children to make sure there are no citizens in CT, just subjects,  but let’s look at the part that’s making me laugh.

mandating all its K-12 classrooms have doors that can be locked from the inside.

I feel for the teachers who leave the classroom and find it locked when they get back. Every substitute in CT is praying that shit don’t happen. Seriously, I predict at least once a day that some teacher is locked out. Then, CT pols will have to pass a law making it a felony to lock a classroom if there’s no shooter which will lead to…. hilarity!

Now this sucks, this really pisses me off. America has always had a “first to invent”, so if you thought something up first, you were the one who could get the patent, but now it’s “First to file”, so if someone finds out about your idea, they can patent it so long as they get there first and claim they invented. That’s fucked up. That’s very bad. That article is pretty good about patents if anybody’s interested.

There are many things that they could do to reform the patent system, the best would be to go back to when business methods were not patentable, I have never seen a business method patent that I thought deserved to be patented. Not a one, and I’ve looked at many thousands of class 705 patents. Most of them are intended only to sue other people.

Even worse, some of the shit that gets patented is ridiculous. There’s a patent for “Exercising Your Cat With A Laser Pointer” and another for “Swinging Side To Side On A Swing”.  For instance, this person got a patent on milking a cow

. A method of milking an animal having at least two teats, the method comprising:

a stimulation phase in which at least one of the teats of the animal is stimulated; and

a milking phase in which the animal is milked;

wherein the method comprises:

applying a stimulation phase and a milking phase to one of the teats of the animal, and

applying substantially only a milking phase to at least one of the other teats of the animal.

Anybody who knows how to milk a cow will notice that they’ve patented how people have been milking cows since…. there have been cows.

Many, like that one, are not in 705, but they’re been patented because business method patents are legal (State St decision where a judge said, “That’s my decision, oh, and business method patents are legal now.”)

That is the Full Patent Attorney Employment Decision.

SondraK somehow got a picture from one of Bloomberg’s nightmare last night. Not sure how.

palin_big_gulp

Aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Round The Tubes: Internet Works Better At Night!

Posted: March 19, 2013 by veeshir in Funniest End of Civilization Evah, Government FAIL, Islam - a religion of tolerance and peace, Jitardis, Liberal Fascism, Mideast Madness, Nanny State, Notes on the Revolution, Obama's Fault, PEBKAC
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Lots of links, let’s see how many I get to!

First some Mideast Madness, it’s like March Madness with the same amount of rioting but more killing.

Soccerdad at Yourish has a good post on Minitrue loving some Intifada.  It’s nothing new for Minitrue to root for terrorists to send children out front with rocks and gunmen behind to draw fire, and if the Jews don’t kill them some kids, the Palestinians will be more than happy to fix that lack and then scream The Jooooooooooooos!

Soccerdad links to this story about how throwing rocks isn’t peaceful.

IDF special forces arrested ten Palestinian men overnight Friday on suspicion of hurling rocks at an Israeli vehicle and being behind an attack that led the car to veer off the road, hit a truck, and leave a three-year-old girl fighting for her life.

Yeah, but it wasn’t the Jews causing problems so you won’t see that story in a Minitrue outlet, can’t have people getting the wrong idea.

Next door in Lebanon, I have to wonder if any your average non-jihadi, Lebanese are hoping the Marines left some stuff in Tripoli they might want to pick up.

“There are snipers from Jabal Mohsen targeting Bab al-Tabbaneh [residents], and a grenade was thrown from Jabal Mohsen onto Syria Street, which led to retaliation from Bab al-Tabbaneh

Those poor bastards are fucked, but they let Hezbollah and other terrorists get strong to fight Israel and then got all upset about how terrorists act like terrorists so my pity is tempered.

This quote is interesting

However, he added that if a battle erupted in Bab al-Tabbaneh, “it will be a spark for [a war] in all of Lebanon, and this is what the Iranian and Syrian regimes are planning.”

Especially considering this

Syrian air force jets fired four rockets at an uninhabited section of the border with Lebanon on March 18, according to security sources.

I can’t figure that out, is Iran just trying to get the whole middle east blow up and why?

They must also be fucking with Israel.

Lebanon: Israeli jets dropped flare bombs along the coast of the southern city of Tyre Monday, security sources told The Daily Star.

The aircraft launched five flares to illuminate the night sky for reconnaissance purposes, the sources said, adding that the devices extinguished five to 10 minutes after they were released.

In Afghanistan we find another group of jihadis who I’ve never heard of.

Following a deadly suicide bombing in northern Afghanistan that killed 10 people on March 13, Afghan and Coalition forces launched separate raids on March 14 and March 15 targeting three senior members of the al Qaeda-linked Islamic Movement of Uzbekistan.

Well that can’t be, Obama strangled the last al Quaeda terrorist himself!

This one is kind of funny but I’d be pretty fucking scared if I was the guy running against Chavez’ successor thug.

Venezuela’s acting president said on Wednesday that “far right” figures in the United States were plotting to kill opposition leader Henrique Capriles

“The Americans are going to kill the guy I’m running against!” says the successor thug in chief (former secret police chief). Eh, it’s better than being killed resisting arrest I guess.

High Praise! for Harvey for giving High Praise! to the Real Revo (accept no substitutes!) with this picture

UNinvolved

Heh.

We all know Europeans’ favorite pasttime is going on killing sprees against the “other”, just ask 1,000+ years of Jews, and further, the Germans are some of the best, the 30 Years War was fought primarily in what is now Germany after all and who can forget them trying to take over the world twice last century? Jihadis, that’s who.

More recently, Salafists have issued death threats against German politicians, including German Chancellor Angela Merkel. “The groups aim to change our society in an aggressive belligerent way so that democracy would be replaced by a Salafist system, and the rule of law replaced by Sharia law.” — Hans-Peter Friedrich, Ministry of the Interior, Germany

Silly jihadis, don’t rile the Germans up, they’re already fucking pissed off at the rest of EUnuchstan sucking their cash and are just looking for someone to kill.

Obama finishes stabbing our eastern European friends in the back to make Tsar Putin I happy.

The United States has effectively canceled the final phase of a Europe-based missile defense system that was fiercely opposed by Russia and cited repeatedly by the Kremlin as a major obstacle to cooperation on nuclear arms reductions and other issues.

When a dictator tells you a defensive system is “provocative”, you know he’s planning invasion routes.

Sorry guys, hopefully the Germans will be on your side when Tsar Putin I tries to rebuild the Soviet Empire.

In Springtime For Hitler news, we see this bit of hilarity.

Krafft was given a pass by reviewers, collectors and critics for his use of swastikas, nazism and Hitler. It was all genius-level kitsch. It belittled the Third Reich, rendering it cheap in scathing mockulatory fashion.

Then a funny thing happened. Krafft was exposed as a white supremacist and holocaust denier.

Does that make it more or less “ironic”?

We’ll seg our ue to America by using another iOwn the World link.  We’ve all seen the new DOD 9 steps for stopping a violent crime without using violence. These folks have provided a handi-doody vid to illustrate the proper method.

That’s hilarious, except it’s what they really expect us to do so it’s not funny at all.

Bwahahahahahahhahaha. The guy is fantastic and the music makes it.

A Trainwreck in Maxwell makes an insightful observation about this story.

Barnegat, N.J.  police arrested a woman after they say she got out of her car, lifted her shirt and bra and exposed her breasts to surveillance cameras.

No picture with the story so, not hot.
Related, DHS MRAPs we’ve been assured are not for the DHS are being spotted on our streets.
Among stated concerns include the obviousness and normalcy of it all.
Eggs-fucking-zactly.
With this bit being a good idea.

“If you see these monsters, photograph them and post the photos on Twitter #DHSMRAP,” he advises, creating a stated intelligence-gathering mission for concerned activists.

“If you see them, report them,” he urges.

Yes.
Totally grassroots protests in Detroit against the governor stepping in to do a real austerity thing, so since austerity now means raising taxes it can’t be called that.
Hundreds of well-organized demonstrators vowing “civil disobedience” will greet Michigan Republican Gov. Rick Snyder’s visit to Cobo Hall in Detroit Monday for an economic summit in order to protest Snyder’s selection of a powerful “emergency manager” to save the city of Detroit from bankruptcy.
You can tell it’s grassroots by how well organized they are, grassroots are always very organized.
The New Puritans.  Less worried about sex but still worried about having unapproved fun.
But puritans haven’t vanished. They’ve merely changed the subject. The expansion of freedom in matters of sex has coincided with a shrinkage in matters of health. New Yorkers would laugh at laws policing sex, but they elected a mayor who has no problem trying to control other physical indulgences.
Hey Bloomberg!
Which is bothering some libertari….libertines like Bill Maher.
Bill Maher blasted New York City, Mayor Michael Bloomberg Friday saying, “There is something wrong about the 7th richest person in the world, lying in bed at night saying, ’You know what people shouldn’t do? Drink too much Sprite. And I’m going to make that a law.’” Last week, state Supreme Court Judge, Justice Milton Tingling struck down Mayor Bloomberg’s soda ban.
I guess we know whose ox is being gored now.
Last we have this bit of scary hilarity. So Chris Matthews sees a revolution coming and he worries about what’s most important to him.
How does Barack Obama escape this frightening axe coming down sharpl and brutally on his presidency? How does he avoid personal harm when the country rises up in anger?
.
Oh noes! Louis the 17th  might be hurt!

Round The Tubes: I Can’t Believe I Haven’t Burned Out Yet!

Posted: March 2, 2013 by veeshir in FAIL, Filthy Hippies, Funniest End of Civilization Evah, GOP FAIL, Government FAIL, Nanny State, Notes on the Revolution, Obama's Fault, PEBKAC, WTF Is Wrong With Wisconsin
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Edition.

Alternate headline

Denial: A better blogging tool than “ctrl C/ctrl V”.

Important, Above The Fold Update!

Dear Whoever Decides Where Commercials Go,

In Kelly’s Heroes you need to put the commercial after the tank blows a hole in the door, not before. You blow the dam joke doing it the way you do.

They just had it on the Military Channel and a military historian guy is explaining to Lou Diamond Philips how the whole end is ridiculous, they’d never get back across the lines.

Lou replies, “But it’s Clint Eastwood!”, the military guy just looks nonplussed. He has no response. Which is the correct response.

Now, back to the post!

Now this is interesting.  In the Godfather there is a bit where Don Corleone says that he tries not to let threats affect how he’ll act. I’ve tried to live by that, but sometimes you just have to respond to show the threatener that they’re nothing.

Hamas has warned President Obama against visiting the holy Temple Mount site in Jerusalem

So what does he do? Interesting.

If I was a high-up in some bellicose Israeli group I would warn him as well just to see his head explode. On the one hand, he will want to do what anybody who hates America wants him to do, but on the other hand he will want to do the opposite of what some people from that shitty, little country want him to do.

Waaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Republicans warn Obama has ‘poisoned’ relations with campaign-style attacks

Awwwwwww, is ums sad cuz of that mean ole Obama?

Jebus, where the fuck have you assholes been the last 4 years? You’re whining cuz I Won isn’t playing nice?

Fuck. I’d say, “Grow  a pair”, but they’d just chop em back off if they did.

A couple links from this guy, one just below one at the end that I’m trying to forget I wrote. You’ll see.

This one cracks me up. I hope it’s true. Supposedly some Obama donor is buying up gun magazines to destroy them.

Good luck with that. Blow many $millions shoveling money into the ground and just give some entrepreneurs a chance to start new magazines.

I doubt it’s true though, you’d think that someone who could make enough money to do that would understand capitalism a little. Unless, of course, the guy got rich from scamming the system, like Acorn or something I guess.

Another poll that doesn’t make sense until you think about it (which I don’t suggest you do).

The people who just reelected Barack Obama don’t like Obamacare.

It’s not that they don’t want Obamacare, it’s that they don’t want to pay for it.

This one cracks me up. It’s a tale of “Fuck You America” and also a tale of “Here Obama, let me suck that for you.”

So Obama’s DHS released 2,000 criminals who were facing deportation. That’s the Fuck You America part, here’s the “Let me suck that” part.

The Homeland Security Department released from its jails more than 2,000 illegal immigrants facing deportation in recent weeks due to looming budget cuts

No, he did it to fuck with us, stop covering for that bullshit.

I will admit they call him a liar, which is cool.

The newly disclosed figures, …are significantly higher than the “few hundred” illegal immigrants the Obama administration acknowledged

Good for them, I’m surprised.

Once again FrnakJ must be on his meds and the calmer, Harvey, personality was on top for a while, so we got the next two.

First up: Obama Kind Bud!

Our Strain of the Union is here! A leader in it’s own right. Obama, is a heavy indica strain that is great for late afternoon or night time medication. This hard to find quintessential strain is sweet and pungent. The inhalation is smooth, resulting in a full body warmth and strong mental high.

Yeah, I’ll bet, if it were really Obama pot, it would cost 10 times what other pot does and it wouldn’t get you high, just give you a headache and some hallucinations via brain damage.

And next, the Assault Musket!

Assalt-Musket

Now I gotta find some scary, black furniture for my Martini/Henry.

This was originally at the top, but I had to move it down because I just couldn’t continue.

After I moved it down I went and got some  more coffee, kicked the dog and then came back and pretended it wasn’t here.

This is where the chuckler belongs, instead I got this hilariously infuriating link.

If I made this up, you people would call me an idiot and say I was being ridiculous. Now, I may be an idiot and I may be ridiculous, but not nearly as stupid and ridiculous as this.

Okay, that’s fucking hilarious,

Q:  A follow up. So someone mowing my lawn, someone shoveling snow for me over the winter, a baby sitter then?

A: Generally, those services would all be covered by the sales tax

I can just see the whole new bureaucracy for going around making sure that kids file forms 7788-425D for shoveling and 7788-426D for mowing lawns and 7788-421D for babysitting.

And I thought them trying to take my guns was going to the most egregious thing they did this month.

Never misunderestimate the greed and gall of a statist running out of money.

I put this in “WTF is wrong with Wisconsin” because they really need to invade Minnesota and handle that for us.

Square The Tubes: Upside Down, Twisted Round: Addition

Posted: March 1, 2013 by veeshir in Anklebiting rugrats, Ask a Moron, Exploding things, FAIL, Funniest End of Civilization Evah, Government FAIL, Notes on the Revolution, Obama's Fault, PEBKAC, Queerblogging, You'll pry 'em from my cold dead hands
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Update: I hate it when I forget something that I wanted to put in the top of the post.

Breitbart died 1 year ago today and the world is a worse place for it.

Andrew-Breitbartposterfinsmi-479x600

What the hell is going on out there? Seriously, things are not so much scary and endy as confusing and WE’RE ALL GONNA something.

Take this.

The Senate on Thursday rejected rival proposals to stop the sequester, ensuring the $85 billion in automatic spending cuts will begin on Friday.

Seriously? There’s infighting in the Senate so they’re cutting spending? WTF? Those assholes only fight to raise spending, not cut it. How am I supposed to hate you assholes if you don’t stop cutting spending? (actually, as we all know, they’re not cutting spending, they’re cutting a minor part of the increase in spending in the important parts, but still)

Gateway Pundit says, “Awful” cuz Senate Dems haven’t passed any sequester bills. I’m not picking on him, cuz I doubt he’s the only one who feels that way, but why is that awful? The fewer spending bills Dems pass the happier I am.

This one is all about teh fucked up. Also via GP, apparently Boehner used the word “ass” and Reid has his petticoats in a bunch because the word “ass” reminds him of a whorehouse. First, Boehner wasn’t calling either Obama or Reid an ass so don’t get your hopes up, but more importantly, what exactly was Reid doing in a whorehouse that the word “Ass” reminds him of one?

Hey, DADT is over, I can ask.

At first this looks odd, but I would suggest it’s not. Income is down over 3% and spending is up .2%.

Hey, eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow we die.

This is the Yelling at the Puppyblender section of the post.

First, PB notices a story about gov’t workers who are involved in union stuff don’t actually do any gov’t work, they do union work.  That’s how it works. I only know the Patent Office for sure, but you fill out your hours and you have “other time”, which means time not doing work on patents, it’s for training or helping your boss or something like that, but the union assholes get other time for doing union work. It’s fucking bullshit, but that’s the gov’t.

I love this one, PB links an article about how the Supreme Court is getting more powerful than Congress.  Yawn, I’ve seen that story a bunch of times over the last 30 years. Why I’m linking is this.

In the Voting Rights Act case, justices are weighing the constitutionality of part of the law Congress reauthorized in 2006 that requires areas with a history of racial discrimination…(get jerked around V)

Who decides which areas have that history? You know they’re talking about them racist bastids in The South.  I saw a documentary once on PBS in Boston. It was about the 50s when blacks were moving north to big cities to get jobs. They had some guy who was big in Boston gov’t (read: Mafioso, just like now) and his quote was, “We didn’t want the blacks mixing in so we decided to make sure they moved to Roxbury with the Jews.” To this day, Roxbury is black and West Roxbury is Jewish.

Dollars to doughnuts that Boston is not included in that Voting Rights Act. Cuz Boston isn’t racist. So long as black folks know their place.

Veeshir defends Obama! Mark your calendars, then have a shot. One of Obama’s illegal aliens releases released an illegal alien who then murdered. So why do I say I’m defending Obama? Because I’ve seen people try to tie it to his sequester warnings that he’s going to KILL US ALL!!!!, this is unrelated. It’s just standard, Obama trying to make America suck as much as he thinks it does.

This one is beautiful. The EU has legislated that young people will have jobs! Fucking brilliant! Why can’t our Congress here outlaw unemployment? Call your legislator, let’s get people working again!

This is the revolution part.

The NYS boycott is up to 106 companies. I’d like to highlight one of them. Progressive Micro Devices does not make guns, they make sensors for stuff like the Virtual Border Fence.

Secondly, Progressive Micro has gone out on a limb here. They make ground sensors, which are not something that most regular citizens would buy. They are generally something that sold to governments. Progressive Micro is putting themselves in the position where they might actually be losing business because of their stance.

I’m praising a company called “Progressive” something. Good for them.

I also really want to praise the guys who named this gun making company that is on the list.

Umbrella Corporation! That’s fucking awesome. It would be better if they made umbrellas, but I’ll take it. That’s almost as cool as the cul de sac where a buddy of mine lived, Kangaroo Court.

NYS pro-gun rally.  Man oh man did NY pols (and I) underestimate their folks.

An aside, fuck you Dennis Rodman and ESPN for acting as if the Kim Jong KG is not a poofy-stomached maniac. Rodman tweeted something about hoping to see Gangnam style. Sigh, they only do that in the north when their guards shoot at their feet to get them to dance. I never liked Rodman, but I had to respect him, now I can’t even do that.

Now here’s Veeshir banging his chubby fist on his high chair and whining at the way the world is.

Chad and I had a deal about ‘standing’ and who has it. I understand he was right and I was wrong, so far as American jurisprudence has decided in this Brave New World, doesn’t mean I agree with it or fucking like it. Quite the fucking opposite in point of fact.

Take this,  according to 31 USC § 1105, Obama has to submit a budget by March, 1 every year. He has only made that deadline once, and never submitted any budget that got one vote, so far as I know, but that’s not why I’m whining.

I’m whining because I should be able to sue him because I’m an American and his breaking of that law affects me personally.

But I don’t have standing. Why not? Because fuck me, that’s why.

Now, let’s have a little Viva Italia!

I have a buddy who lived in Italy for a few years, he was involved in some organic cooking school, and I asked him about good old Beppo Grillo, he of the Italian Vaffanculo Day Protests, he responded and I’ve put it below the fold, with his permission.

I asked him about the literal meaning of Vaffanculo.

Yes, it literally means: ‘ to go-do-make up the ass’. But, more idiomatically, ‘Fuck you up your ass!’

I’ve been using that word forever and knew what each part meant but never put it together. Harry Reid would love that word. Let’s send him to Italy!

As for the below, like most of my friends from upstate NY, he’s pretty lefty, so ignore the military industrial complex stuff.

(more…)

Like Spy Vs. Spy

Posted: February 27, 2013 by veeshir in Bipartisan FAIL, FAIL, Funniest End of Civilization Evah, Government FAIL, Islam - a religion of tolerance and peace, Jitardis, Mideast Madness, Notes on the Revolution, Obama's Fault
0

Only stupid.

Remember when the huddled masses, yearning to be free looked to America? That was the Before, we’re in the Now.

To try to rescue the meeting (with Kerry about Syria V), Robert S. Ford, the American ambassador to Syria and chief envoy to the opposition, was sent to Cairo on Sunday to implore opposition leaders to attend the session in Rome.

 

We’re reduced to begging jihadis to talk to us.

 

Next, a little Ukrainian humor.

Eh, I wouldn’t click, they’re speaking whatever it is they speak in Ukraine. Here’s the story , apparently some geeks feel the need to have the gov’t want to kill them so they’re demanding their Internet Party (a political party)

“As a symbol of invincibility and power of Internet Party of Ukraine I decided to intervene personally into a destiny of this institution,” the man said. “I will not let any Rabinovich to make raider attacks on oppositional political parties. I will make every official directly or indirectly involved in this crime to regret about it.

 

It’s all fun and games until you end up in a dank dungeon, like the former PM.

 

In more “When a nitwit meets a nitwit going through the rye (whiskey)” news: Hannity V Ellison! No brains enter, one mouth leave!

 

In related news (no whiskey this time) we see that Obama and Congressional ‘Leaders’ are going to meet to avert the catastrophe that is sequester the day after it goes into effect.

My prediction of no budget, just another continuing spending resolution is looking better and better.

 

In ignorant fool v ignorant fool news, I’m linking the Grauniad to praise them not point and spit!

They’re making fun of the BBC for some global warmmongering idiocy they put out. Quoth the gruaniad making fun of BBC

Africa’s climate is certainly changing. Some parts of the continent have become 3.5C hotter in the past 20 years.

 

They call bullshit on that, I’m surprised about this, the Grauniad  makes stuff up all the time, but good for them anyway.

 

This one should be hilarious, except it’s not. Some guy wrote a poem praising the Tunisians’ revolution, gets a sentence of life in prison the Thug of Qatar . Civil libertarians are OUTRAGED!!!!!! that a place that has no free speech doesn’t have free speech, so they reduced the sentence to 15 years. The head thugs actually thought that would make it all better. See? Funny but not.

Once again, I’m on the Nazi’s side. A retired soldier tried to fly a flag, HOA says no.

Listen, if you want to be free on your own property, do not cede control to an HOA.

 

Another attempt at a drudgetaposition

Libyan arms seized on way to Gaza.

Libya wants arms embargo lifted so they can import weapons.

 

Okay, this is fucked up. In the 80s I had a lot of money with Shearson/Lehman brothers. Shortly thereafter, like many others, I didn’t have any money with Shearson/Lehman bro’s. Fuck. So last year I checked on NY State’s “recovered funds page” and found that my 401(k) was still opened. My $2k had skyrocketed over 20 years to $3k! Eh,  I got it when I needed it.

So what’s fucked up about that? This from Australia.

Under recent changes to the law designed to raise $109 million this financial year, deposits can be deemed unclaimed if a transaction has not been made on an account for three years or more, down from seven years previously.

Accountant Bryan Lukav oversaw an account for a client that contained the bond for a commercial property. He was advised to withdraw or deposit at least $1. If he didn’t, he was told the government could seize the account.

 

Fuck, they just have no rights.

3 chucklers today! I’m all excited.

First, I don’t get this. Russia is upset their hotdogs have horse meat in them. What? You’re afraid there won’t be enough insect and rat parts? Hotdogs, like food only not.

 

Don’t get me wrong, I like going to Vegas, but when people complain about losing I always say, “That’s why bookies drive Caddies.”

The only way a bookie goes broke is if he gets hit with a huge winner(s) or his protection money is too high. NY OTB went bankrupt for the second reason.

Now, let’s look at lottery, it’s gambling for people who can’t do math. The house takes a ridiculous percentage.

Illinois is bouncing checks to the winners.

Wrap your head around that, you have a 1 in 93 trillion chance of winning and that’s not enough for them to stay solvent.  “Hey, you can’t win if you play” isn’t a good selling model for lottery.

The NY Post gets “cannibal’ , ‘BBQ’ and ‘Beauty’ in the headline! Bravo!

Round the Tubes, By The Time You See This It’ll Be Tomorrow

Posted: February 27, 2013 by veeshir in Conservatism, Exploding things, Funniest End of Civilization Evah, Geektasticity, Government FAIL, Hotassery, Islam - a religion of tolerance and peace, Notes on the Revolution, Obama's Fault, Win!
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Edition.

First, via the Jawas we get  a link with a quote.

Catholic priests say they are living in fear after a clergyman was murdered on the final day of a music festival promoting religious tolerance.

So who else was involved? You can’t tell the players without a program.

coexist1

I’ll try my hand at a Drudgetaposition.

Christie not invited to CPAC

Christie announces expansion of medicare.

Via Wyatt, I finally looked at that article where Kerry called Americans idiots, I didn’t realize he wasn’t in America when he said that (Kerry, not Wyatt).

If he had been in his home nation I wouldn’t have had a problem with him saying what we all know he ‘thinks’,  but he wasn’t in France, he was in fucking Germany.  Asshole.

I like Michael Z. Williamson’s books, so I felt bad about making fun of his “Manly Guns” list (I still think it wasn’t good with the AK being ridiculous on that list), so I’m happy I get to link him with an Atta Boy.

Headline

Vice President Shithead Doesn’t Understand The Constitution

Then he starts to explain why, beginning with this

“How can I say this politely?

Not sure, but you made a good start.

Next time you’re thinking how counter-productive the minimum wage is, ponder this Aussie nannarchism. This is  that Aussie pub owner in Queensland that I like linking, talking about the gov’t mandated pay rates for his employees.

The payscale section of the industrial award  or instrument (not my terminology) that applies to the Wayside Tavern has 962 pay rates, yes Nine-Hundred-and-Sixty-Two.(emphasis original V)

He says, “Why not a thousand?”

Cuz that would just be ridiculous.

Okay, this one is darn funny.  As we all know (or not), in EUnuchstan they kept finding horse meat in everything a week or two ago., Well, in South Africa they’re finding

Soya, donkey, goat, water buffalo and plant material were found in up to 68 percent of the 139 minced meats, burger patties, delicatessen meats, sausages and dried meats tested by the university.

Well duh. I’d be happy it’s not people. I just hope nobody checks the food in the Congo. I’d bet that pork loin was long pig.

When I was in Kenya in 1984, my buddy was living there so we just rented a Suzuki Samurai and cruised all over,.  I ate red curry “kabob and chips” everywhere. If they had refrigeration, plates and silverware, I would even eat the cole slaw. Often they didn’t, it was just some shack with a bubbling pot of oil for french fries and a rusty car fender over a fire for cooking kabob.

I didn’t want to know what the hell meat I was eating, I was mostly hoping it wasn’t people. I’d bet a dollar I’ve eaten baboon, monkey, water buffalo and maybe even lion if I was lucky.

A little Veeshir Vlashback. I was looking for something else when I saw this Round the Tubes  link. It’s from one of the previous times the debt “crisis” was GONNA KILL US ALL!!!!!! (the subtitle’s “Game Over Man, Game Over!)

First, even if Congress makes a “Deal”, all it’s going to do is attempt to kick the can down the road. They’ll just raise the borrowing limit (because this time, THIS TIME!!!!!!!!!, they’re going to fix the US fiscal state), before not cutting shit. Hell, they can ‘t even “cut” the increases, does anybody think they can actually cut spending in the way anybody not of our self-proclaimed Elite would think of it? If so, I have some prime beach land for sale, sure you can’t quite see the ocean from here, but it’s very sandy and sunny.

Wash, rinse, raise my taxes. Repeat. Well, at least this time we’ll have the hilarity of them all freaking out over there being no budget that they’ll fix by passing a continuing spending resolution instead of  a budget. You see, earmarks are only in budgets and they can pretend that they haven’t “budgeted” a deficit if they don’t have one.

Now something that I hope is for real. I can’t really quote any parts out, if you’re into the details, check it out. It looks plausible, if you accept the premise that carbon can be used to make batteries.

These dudes think they have a  totally new, cheap, very efficient battery.

I hope so, because the state of battery technology is not very good, we just can’t make them clean or very efficient. Those are clean to produce and supposedly efficient.

I’m not sure about how polluting they’d be to dispose (I don’t know if they’d have battery acid), but a battery that is not an ecological nightmare to produce and is efficient would be awesome.

I expect all Green Scientists to fight this tooth and nail, because green science is neither and that battery would be both.

Eh, maybe they could make ‘em with a hammer and sickle logo to get Global Warmmongers onboard.

Don’t forget, check out This Ain’t Hell to see who to vote for and then check out the cheerleaders. I suggest you look very closely at all the pictures at the second link and then vote for the two at the first link.

Post needs pics, hmmmm, perhaps something yellow and soft to make John Effin Kerry feel welcome.

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Round The Tubes: Don’t Rush Into Things

Posted: February 26, 2013 by veeshir in China, Conservatism, Funniest End of Civilization Evah, Government FAIL, Nanny State, Notes on the Revolution, PEBKAC
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In the 90s and 00s they sing about cough syrup (Flaming Homers), in the 70s they had different priorities.

Rush is the perfect metaphor for the musical transition from the 70s to the 80s. They went from this to Big Money in just 10 years. Sigh.

So let’s go tubin’!

I was going on about this a few years ago and I’ve been watching it to see what happens.

Headline and subhed.

America’s Red State Growth Corridors

Low-tax, energy-rich regions in the heartland charge ahead as economies on both coasts sing the blues.

 

The problem is that the leftist states are fucked and many of the rest are doing fine.

So instead of taking money from The Rich(tm) to give to their constituents, they’ll have to take money from the rich states to give to the poor states.

The interesting part will be that the rich states won’t be so easy to intimidate as the feds might think and somehow, I don’t see Texas being happy about paying for California’s welfare state.

I’ll tell you what, the old Chinese curse of “interesting times” is a good description, it’s very interesting to see what’s going to happen.

China’s “Stealth Frigate“,  I just love the way commies and other murderous dictators always have to give their stuff names that make it sound as if it means something and the way western ‘journalists’ just accept it. It takes people like the Jawa Report to notice that the Iranians crappy p-shops are p-shops.

 

I’ve been practicing my repentance speech but somehow I don’t think He’s going to buy it cuz I keep smiling and laughing when I get to certain points, so this one scares me cuz it might be the sign of the endtimes. Why? Check out who I’m praising.

The Supreme Court is refusing to hear a case because the plaintiffs don’t have standing. Apparently, the govt’s claim of a right to listen to Americans on the phone without a warrant doesn’t mean Americans have standing to sue.

It was a 5-4 decision, the 4 saying “Americans do have standing to sue for violations of the 5th amendment”  are Breyers, Sotomayor, Kagan and Ginsberg. I agree with the 4 people who I think have no idea what the Constitution actually says and I am furiously fucking angry at Scalia, Alito and even Clarence motherfucking Thomas, I was sure Thomas was in the dissent and he wasn’t .

Fuck. No, fuck. I don’t know which way it should be decided, but it surely should be fucking heard. The gov’t is saying more that every amendment doesn’t mean what it says. I wonder if those assholes will think I have standing when they start quartering troops in my house.

NY pol wears blackface to a party, outrage ensues, but that doesn’t mean any news stories about it are going to mention the guy’s a Dem.

 

Nice Deb has vid of Chuckie Schumer doing what he does best, lying to your face with that smug fucking grin. “We’re not going to create a registration of firearms, but when we pass the law on universal background checks, we’ll create a database of the information.”

This is one of those “funny never” things that you have to laugh at. Recall that in NC if a black woman accuses white men of rape, they’re guilty. But if a white girl accuses the wrong people of rape, well, she needs to be expelled.

That’s another my favorite intertubes memes, how we have to read about bad stuff about Americans with the “proper” beliefs  in furrin papers.

 

I’ll end on a touchy subject. It involves hot women whose fathers are in the military.  You can help the hot daughters of friends of This Ain’t Hell to become Colts’ Cheerleaders.

So grab your…mouse and go look at This Ain’t Hell and then go vote. Seriously, that last link, is bery, bery good, but check the TAH link to see how you can help TAH while you’re helping yourself.

Round the Tubes: Fauxnews Edition

Posted: February 23, 2013 by veeshir in Edumakashun, Exploding things, Funniest End of Civilization Evah, GOP Win!, Government FAIL, Jitardis, Liberal Fascism, Mideast Madness, Notes on the Revolution, Obama's Fault, PEBKAC, The Little Screen
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Rand Paul is shown here tilting at the right windmills, it’s a “The Hill” link (Minitrue franchisee) but it has Rand Paul saying something like (I don’t feel like doing the quote exactly)

Obama is saying I have no intention to drone-kill Americans when he should be saying he has no right to do so.

 

Bingo. I did go to Foxnews to look for the video but they wanted me to watch :26 seconds of an ad to see a minute of video, they surely have the right to do that, just like I have the right to not waste my time watching what they want me to.

It’s too bad, I saw the interview yesterday and I was wondering if they left in the part where he was talking about Obama talking about sequestration. He said that Obama was a liar 4 different ways, it looked as if he was trying to soften it like the vid the other day, but this time he went on and said it was “dishonest, disingenuous…” I can’t remember the rest of the words he used, but his Roget’s thesaurus must be dog-eared at “liar”.

 

 

Speaking of Obama’s Cox Skybomber armada, they’re admitting they’re bringing it to America!

Remember folks, birdshot doesn’t bring them down unless you hit just the right spot but you might not have a tight enough pattern if you use buckshot, so I’d get a few different loads and see what works best.

I read in Valdez is Coming, a western that was made into a Burt Lancaster movie, that the guy melted beef tallow into his shotgun shells and it kept their pattern very tight for a distance. If anybody knows about that, let me know, that might be a good drone-load.

 

It’s funny, as Obama is deploying his drones to watch (kill?) me, the military is grounding the planes used to kill furriners.

They found a cracked engine blade in an F-35 so they’re all grounded. Yay! My only problem is that it’s only 51 of them, c’mon guys, it’s not funny unless it’s over 200 and maybe a whole carrier wing is grounded or something. Listen, we’re not ALL GONNA DIE!!!!  if you morons keep pussy-footing around.

 

Now, I hate to laugh at a brave man killed performing a thankless duty, so I won’t, I will laugh at the idjit “journalist”

First, check out the headline

Little impact in violent Mexican border city after police chief disappears, brothers slain

 

So…. what sort of impact were you expecting? Less violence? Free puppies for all children? The thugs running the city killed the guy who was trying to make an impact you moh-rons.

Now, a conundrum.

In one of Mexico’s most violent border cities, no one is saying what happened to Police Chief Roberto Balmori Garza.

 

Hmmm, I wonder if there are any clues?

It’s been a week since he went missing from Nuevo Laredo and the local news media have reported nothing, even after two of his brothers showed up murdered in a neighboring state on Feb. 17. One of them was an agent for the federal Attorney General’s Office.

Eh, probably just went to Hawaii for a little vacay. I wonder how scared people are in this violent town.
City spokesman Juan Jose Zarate said the local government has no confirmation that Balmori Garza disappeared, only that he has not come to work.
Well, nobody’s seen him in a long time, but that doesn’t mean he’s disappeared!
I would bet a dollar that Juan Jose Zarate knows exactly where the sheriff is. The first time I saw this movie, with Audie Murphy playing the part of the sheriff who replaces the not-missing sheriff, the good guys won. Somehow, with Obama selling guns to the bad guys, I’m not so sanguine.
I’ve given up on hoping for the best in Syria, rather, I’ve decided the best outcome in Syria is for me not to pay attention.
Sigh, once in a while I can’t do that. It’s just too good a lesson on History. Only one (maybe two) revolutions have not been taken over by just a different set of thugs (America and the Dutch, although they threw off a foreign yoke not their own rulers) and we’re seeing the normal course of affairs playing out in real time.
So in this case we see the gov’t has lost control over their country, they’re actually fighting for their second biggest airport, and since it’s an airport in a vicious dictatorship

The rebels have cut off the highway the army has been using to transport troops and supplies to a military base within the airport complex. The airport east of the city is part of a complex that includes a smaller military airfield and the base.

That means the jihadis getting a military base too.  Yay! Jihadis in MiGs and Mirages! And they won’t be aiming for Israel! That’s unexpected. The FEOCE! doesn’t always run in predictable patterns, that’s what makes it so fun.
As a math teacher, I have to say I’m glad I read this story.
One question stated the number of slaves who died while taking over a ship. It asked how many slaves were still alive. The other said a slave was whipped five times a day and asked students to calculate how many times a month he was whipped.
I’m in Arizona, so I’ll use word-problems like, “There are 20 soldiers and 10 women in the fort, if only 5 soldiers remembered to save two bullets at the end instead of just one,  how many white women were killed and raped by Injuns?”
Topical is the way to go.
Okay, this one is absolutely chillingly hilarious. When I was learning my mistrust of people there were three classes of people who I trusted implicitly: Kindergarten teachers, 1st grade teachers and school nurses.

A Franklin County kindergarten teacher has been charged with trying to have her ex-husband killed and a school nurse is accused of helping her.

Jeebus, now I have to wonder what the hell the 1st grade teacher in that school is doing.
Let’s end this on Good News From Texas.
First, the very first blog post ever, Travis’ letter to everybody saying, “WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!” (my hero), has been returned to the Alamo.
Makes me hope that this blog, containing all my “WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!” posts, is returned to the home for the criminally insane when I die.
Texas man ventilates bad guy! He was heard to say, “What are your insides doing on the outside you dumb bastard?”
Or not, but I hope so.
Two of the three were arrested later on, the third was heard to say, “”
Cuz he’s dead.

Did Somebody Hit A Switch Or Leave A Door Open?

Posted: February 20, 2013 by veeshir in Exploding things, Filthy Hippies, Funniest End of Civilization Evah, GOP FAIL, Government FAIL, Hotassery, Notes on the Revolution, Obama's Fault
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Seriously, what the hell is going on today? Yesterday was all boring and today is going freaking crazy.

This, like a bunch of other links, would be “my favorite” that I end on for a chuckler, but today is freakishly, bizarrely, odd.

Take this one,  it makes sense to people who are in charge of parts of our country, and in charge of us.

So some constituents/ATMs demand that they release wolves into the wild.

Other constituents/ATMs demand they be allowed to kill the wolves who are eating their livestock.

So what to do, what to do? I know, let’s call that 87 lb canine a coyote! Brilliant!

Seriously, they’re releasing them as wolves and others are shooting them as coyotes. My father used to raise quail for some gun clubs, I wonder if Colorado or Michigan need me to raise wolves for them to shoot?

I love this, it’s my favor…well, it’s one of those “always funny”

Minitrue outlet (Po-lie-itico) claiming that Obama is just so brilliant about manipulating them and that’s why they suck him off so much. I’m with them, I mean, when he tells them to leave him alone while he eats his waffles there’s nothing they can do but write a hagiography. It’s just axiomatic. That’s from Paco, I think he’s the one who made up “global warmmonger” at Tim Blair’s site.

This one is my…. well, it’s funny.

As we all know from FrnakJ explaining it, lax gun laws in other states causes problems like Chicago’s new boroughs are based on which gang you belong to.

My favorit.. Texas is saying that they won’t enforce federal gun grabbing laws they think are against the Constitution. How does the Supreme Court deal with that? I know how Obama would argue it.

Mr. Roberts tear down this wall!

Mr. Roberts! Tear Down This Wall!!!!!!!!

 

Okay, my favor… well, it’s the quote of the day at Blackiswhite (Its not really, I think that’s social commentary) in response to some guy named Alfie.

What’s it all about? Let Teresa answer. Coffee, nose hairs, screen alert.

I’m sure Alfie would agree that we should make every woman who has an abortion be on a registry of some sort as well. Why should they be entitiled to more privacy than gun owners? Sure, they’re law-abiding citizens, they are protected by the Constitution, blah, blah, blah. It’s not like they are going around killing peop……

Hardeee har har har.

 

I like Ace, I respect Ace, but I see people saying stuff like this all the time and I think it fundamentally misunderstands the point. He’s talking about infighting in the GOP.

If we’re going to have a war of all against all, let’s have it, honestly.

The way I see it (and I have been known to be wrong. No, really), is that this begs the question that I am a Republican. I am not a Republican. I vote GOP because they at least claim to stand for the things I do. I would be an idiot trying to get a Democrat who wanted to cut taxes and reduce gov’t elected. Although, as we’ve been seeing, we’re idiots for thinking we can get a Republican elected who wants to cut taxes and reduce gov’t.

I’ve pretty much decided to leave the GOP alone and try the Libertarians. Let the GOP have their inclusive party that doesn’t include the people who’ve been voting GOP. As for the Libertarians, to paraphrase/attempt to quote FrnakJ, “Libertarianism, a completely reasonable political philosophy most vocally espoused by the insane.” I know I won’t be any help, but I hope some none insane people start trying to defend them.

 

Jay notes some shit and asks the question I was asking myself when I decided to do this post.

Is it just me, or is the level of “just plain stupid” rising?

It’s not just you Jay.

 

This one shows some of my favo… well it makes me laugh, until I think about it.

So if the evil Sequestration happens, the Pentagon is going to furlough 800,000 workers.

So what does that mean? 800,000 get a few days to a month off and then get paid for that time all at once. Savings to America? Negative savings, we’ll pay those people for time they didn’t work.

Yay! That’ll show….us.

 

Crap, that just depresses me until I think abou tit.

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