Archive for the ‘Kittehs!’ Category

Teach a man Veeshing and he’ll be hilariously OUTRAGED! for ever.

First we’ll do some hilarity.

Terrorists have a new Facebook page. Seriously? What do they do? Suicide bomb Farmville?

Even funnier, terrorists have hacked the BBC’s weather twitter account. Al Gore hardest hit.

Now some endy that ain’t funny at all.

Lebanon is fucked. Sunni V Shiite in Tripolis is getting out of hand.

Deadly clashes erupted once again in Lebanon’s troubled northern city of Tripoli after simmering sectarian tensions boiled over into a melee of violence that has seen snipers fatally shoot people amid explosions and heavy gunfire.

Truck bombs on the way. Poor bastids.

A little hope in Egypt, Egyptians getting sick of Islamist assholes.

n two notable incidents in the northern province of Alexandria and the province of Suez, citizens beat bearded men who tried to impose their presence on the streets in order to preserve security. When the men tried to yell at women for what they saw as indecent clothing and threatened them with punishment if they ever wore those clothes again, the women yelled back at them and started hitting them with their shoes before passersby rallied, caught some of bearded men and beat the ones who were too slow to escape.

I’d be more on their side if they weren’t fine with it when the jihadis were killing Copts, but now that they’re going after eveybody else, well, that’s beyond the pale.

The Muslim Brotherhood is having problems in Cairo too.

Several thousand opponents of Egypt’s Muslim Brotherhood clashed with supporters of the Islamist group near its headquarters in Cairo on Friday

I’m rooting for them, take your revolution back before you live in some Islamist shithole where not having a beard and listening to music is verboten.

 

Speaking of poor bastids, ethnic problems in Burma.

Myanmar has declared martial law in four central towns following unrest between Buddhists and Muslims that has left at least 20 people dead.

Agitated crowds of Buddhists were still roaming the streets and several neighbourhoods were still on fire or smouldering after hundreds of Muslims were forced to flee for their lives.

 

How pissed off do you have to make Buddhists to get them be all violent?

Not sure if this is good or bad, but it’s change.

The people of Turkey are digesting the historic statement from jailed rebel leader Abdullah Ocalan, who called for a PKK ceasefire on March 21….

“From now on the principles of the Turkish state could be different. It’s a process of creating a new constitution.

Maybe even some hope. I’m rooting for them, the Kurds just keep getting fucked.

Another case of exporting our values.

Most Ukrainians see their parliament representatives only once in four years — during the election campaign. But soon after getting elected, many deputies forget about accountability.

Just like ours!

My posts have been all disjointed so I’m trying for structure, this case of an unintentionally accurate headline is where we seg our ue to America.

Obama cements his symbolic support of Israel

Symbolic is absolutely correct, cuz he doesn’t support them in any other way.

This is one of those “Needs a different headline” stories.

US plan calls for more scanning of private Web traffic, email

Alternate headline: “Veeshir to put Fuck You DHS, NSA, FBI, CIA in the subject line of every email”

In more, “We’re fucking assholes” news, Via Weasel Zippers, we see some GOPers going for headlines and Democrats refusing to even symbolically say they’re against crushing America.

It would have sent the budget back to the Budget Committee until Saturday with instructions to make it balance by 2023.

They’re refusing to say they’ll balance the budget in 13 years. First, anything but this year is calling me an idiot as future Congresses will not be bound by this stupidity, second, seriously? Democrats don’t feel the need to even pretend they give a shit about fiscal sanity?

I mean, we’re going to be utterly fucked by 2023 so the budget will either be balanced by reality or we’ll all be serfs living in a EUnuchstania-like  EUtopia so this utterly symbolic thing was stupid from the get-go, but at least pretend to care.

In, We’re Running Out Of Money news, Paramus, NJ (shopping haven) is fining folks for leaving their lights on after dark.

-Businesses in Paramus, New Jersey are getting tickets when they leave their sign lights on….

“We’ve been her for 25 years and never had an issue,” Billard says.

They’re broke, tread carefully as they become creative about getting blood from your stones.

So the GOP has been trying to figure out what to do to be more palatable as a choice, so they’ve decided that the most important GOP presidential candidate to be like is…. Mike Fucking Huckabee!

Priebus cited former governor Mike Huckabee of Arkansas as an example of someone who could be “a model for a lot of people in our party”

Seriously? If you were saying that to say, “Get the fuck out of politics and get a job as blow-dried telemprompter reader” I’d respect it, but he’s not. He thinks the candidate that was worse than both McCain and Romney is their fucking model.

So, still pissed off at me for saying Fuck the GOP I’m voting 3rd party instead of throwing my vote away?

Cold Fury just keeps harshing my mellow, and my mellow isn’t very yellow as it is. At least this one has some seriously hilarity.

Florida professor and high-ranking member of the Palm Beach County Democratic Party recently instructed his students to take out a piece of paper, write “JESUS” on it, then put it on the floor and stomp on it – and the Mormon student who refused to do so, calling the assignment morally offensive – was suspended….

In an emailed statement the university sent to CBS, campus officials stated “faculty and students at academic institutions pursue knowledge and engage in open discourse. While at times the topics discussed may be sensitive, a university environment is a venue for such dialogue and debate.”

Dialogue does not seem to mean what they think it does. Kid tried to introduce another viewpoint and they suspended him as they proudly talked about dialogue. That’s fucking funny. You know, so long as you’re not the kid who’s paying $thousands a year to go there.

 

In my life eggs have been good for you and bad for you, alternatingly, too many times to count. Ditto bacon, vino and sharp sticks in the eye… way, check that last one.

So has salt. I have an alternate take on this one though.

One in 10 Americans dies from eating too much salt, the researchers found.

Salt, necessary for human life is bad for you! If that were true, then NJ would be depopulated. Seriously, I’ve never met any people who put more salt on everything.

Some illustrations.

A little early for Caturday, but I might be busy tomorrow so I’m posting it today.

Via Tim Blair’s cat post we see this bit of evil hilarity.

 

catrug

Although, it just doesn’t seem as impressive as a bear skin rug. How can you brag about how it was about to bit your toes when you took it.

 

This is genius, I’m going to have to get one to go with my Gadsden Flags.

times_up_flag_z

 

You know, cuz time’s pretty darn close to up.

Have fun everybody and don’t forget, if you’re not hilariously OUTRAGED!!!! you’re just not Veeshing.

 

 

First with the gunny.

Ahhh, that New Congress smell. It smells like….shackles.

House members seem to have been very active filing bills dealing with firearms. By my count, there were eight anti-gun bills and one pro-gun bill filed in the House of Representatives yesterday. None of the bills listed below have the text of legislation available so we’ll have to wait a few days to see the details of just how they plan to screw gun owners.

Read the list, you can tell what they’re going to try to do. Save the Children* (*Actual results may vary)

Now with the Money.

According to that article low income folks will see proportionately higher taxes. First, good. Decisions should have consequences and we’ve decided to ignore reality, that should be painful.

But one point I’d like to make that can’t be stressed enough, notice that’s in a Brit paper. Furriners, doing the journalism Americans refuse to do.

Speaking of Runny, as Egypt gets its dictatorship on, Syria burns, Iran keeps on a nukularizing, Norks make nice noises, China gets frisky in the South China Sea and more, Obama is spending $12 million by running to vacay in Hawaii and Sloe Joe is running to his vacation in the US Virgin Islands.

Now, I understand they’re in constant contact, but is it too much to ask for one of them to at least pretend they give a shit about what’s happening in the world?

Now, the funny.  So Pelosi had a pic of some Democratic Wymyn but it wasn’t all of them, so she P-shopped them in.

This guy is a little confused about his profession but he knows he likes to help out our fine political masters so he helped Pelosi out.

dem wymyn

I would have put Obama waving in there, but I’m less subtle than he.

Important update: The same guy has an all axes pass for 2013. I love it, but what I really want is to get his bonus points. I don’t know if it’ll be over the all axes pass or what, but I fully intend to do that.

Now with the honey. (more…)

Mann Down!

Posted: October 31, 2012 by veeshir in Green Goofs, HAHAHAHAHAA!!!!, Kittehs!

Okay, that’s hilarious.

For those not in the know, Michael Mann, global warmmongering bullshit artist and maker-upper of the “hockey-stick” school of global warmmongering bullshit, claims he won a Nobel Prize. Turns out, he didn’t realize people can use the Intertubes to check stuff like that. He didn’t win a prize. Penn State put out some bullshit about how proud they are of the way Michael Mann is ‘associated’ or something with some people who won a Nobel.

So National Review decided to get funny.

There aren’t enough “ha”s for my “bwa” on that one.

As Ed Driscoll at the Puppy Blender’s said, “That’s gonna leave a mark”.

It almost makes me feel sorry for Penn State, they’re having a bad decade, but considering why they’re having a bad decade, fuck em.  I’ll just point and laugh as they go from a great school to a punch line (in both senses of the word “Punch”, IMO).

As an aside, this deserves a link.

I steal from…link to Are We Lumberjacks once in a while, he cracks me up. In this case, it’s not a link but an idea. This sounds so Lemur King that I actually had to check the link to make sure it was AWL.

He talks about what to do when a storm is coming, and I fully intend to do this if I ever live in a neighborhood again.

Wrapped the mail box in tinfoil; which will do no good, but it’s fun to do to see if your neighbors will assume it’s important and follow suit. (it takes a few storms for them to get the idea but once the first neighbor gets on board the whole thing snowballs – pretty soon the neighbor wives are hectoring the hubbies, “come on, there’s a storm coming and you haven’t even wrapped the mailbox yet.”)

Okay, that’s funny.

Eh, the blog hasn’t had any kitteh pics in a long time. A couple below the fold. I edited this a little to get rid of some mistakes.

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Hahahahaha! Fuck you, hipster douchebags. Fuck your attempts to refuck that which was unfucked by the Supreme Court’s Floccosely Fucksmack For Freedom’s Sake. Fuck your arrogance so hard, Chuck Negron’s replacement cock will explode from the shock. Fuck you and your hebetic mindset for thinking that celebritydom and a cute publicity stunt would trump the Constitution and the laws the rest of us are forced to follow and allow you to skip the line when it comes to the First Amendment. And fuck you simply because I love seeing people who think they are so fucking smart fail so immensely at satirizing a decision with which they disagree.

Games for Kittehs

Posted: May 19, 2011 by socklessjoe in Kittehs!, Random Crap, Win!

For iPad and Android: GamesForCats.com

Fuck you. Hortleifuck you as if you were a hollowed out nerf football used by a confused teenager coming of age. Fuck you for sitting on that couch with Pelosi. Fuck you for your arrogance. Fuck you for your stupidity. Fuck you for criticizing someone who has a plan that doesn’t involve skittles and rainbowed goatse while you sat around cheating on your wives. And fuck you because you seem determined to fuck everything up.

That pop you’re hearing?

Posted: April 23, 2011 by aliceaitch in Kittehs!, Soccer - sport of men

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