How to Save the Planet and Get Rich Quick

Posted: June 1, 2011 by veeshir in Green Goofs, It's Science!, WTF is wrong with Illinois

There’s nothing new about a state sponsored religion. There’s nothing new about that religion being a huge scam to provide money to the clergy and money and power to the rulers. The Catholic Church was especially good at this for close to a thousand years.

What is new is exactly how ridiculous the latest religion is, how heretics are attacked as being anti-science as they more and more blatantly just make stuff up with the more credulous adherents not only lapping it up but heatedly defending it.

People who don’t know the average temperature of the Earth, who get angry when you try to talk about the Sun and then call you an ignorant tool of Big Oil just get funnier and funnier the more you see them.

In today’s scamtastic episode, Chicago is global-worming-proof (NY Times Link, sorry) their city. No, really.

Climate scientists have told city planners that based on current trends, Chicago will feel more like Baton Rouge than a Northern metropolis before the end of this century.

The trend they’re talking about is, I assume, the extreme upwardly trending temperatures of late.

It averaged in the teens or colder as little as 5 months ago! If current trends continue, by January it’ll be 148.367 degrees!!!!!!!  (more decimal places means more Science)

I’m absolutely sure that Chicago politicians are just looking out for their constituents, they absolutely believe WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!! unless SOMETHING IS DONE! and are totally not just trying to figure out how to milk a few $billion more out before all of Illinois goes bankrupt.

Seriously, I can’t even type that with a straight face. I’ll have to practice some more.

Update:

Meant to quote this from the article above when discussing their treatment of heretics, you can tell the whole article is balanced by this quote

The skeptics are supported by constituents wary of science

You see, we’re anti-science. The science is settled and if you question it (by asking to see their work), you’re anti-science.  Global Warmmongering is True Science, it’s handed down from on high (maybe on some nice tablets) and is totally not religious in nature.

Comments
  1. alexthechick says:

    I’m absolutely sure that Chicago politicians are just looking out for their constituents,

    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHHAHAAHA

    Man, that’s the funniest thing I’ve read in ages.

  2. Purple Raider says:

    This after Chicago just went through the coldest, rainiest, snowiest spring ever.

    Nice timing Raul. Epic fucking fail.

  3. SOYLENT GREEN says:

    Global Warming? Bankrupt?
    Are you sure they didn’t already run into these guys, Veeshir?

    http://cbullitt.wordpress.com/2011/06/01/right-hand-youd-better-keep-an-eye-on-left-hand/

    • Veeshir says:

      That’s actually kind of surprising, Chicago pols don’t usually lag that far behind in the scam department.
      I hadn’t really thought about that.

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