Shots Fired At The Capitol

Posted: October 3, 2013 by veeshir in Fun With Media, Obama's Fault, Random Crap

Prepost update required because the shutdown and the sequester are making it impossible to make a new post.


My prediction for the bad guys in the “Machete Kills” movie: Tea Partiers.


Back to our regularly scheduled post.


Now as per our media betters, I don’t know anything but that won’t stop me from reporting on it.

Apparently, it was a bunch of Occutards who got angry about the gov’t shutdown imperiling their welfare, food stamps and Obamaphones so they all grabbed their AR-47s, Glock 22 magnums, with bayonets, a few RPGs (they got through the gun-show loophole) and an assault/military/police style shotgun with the shoulder thing that goes up.

48 babies have been killed, the suspects are now holed up in the closed WWII Memorial, sniping at people in Chinatown, but because of the sequester and the shutdown, there are no police to take them into custody.

Further updates as I get a few more hits on a bong, or you could get stuff that’s a little less factual from FNC (Hey Shep!), CNN or MSNBC.

Important update:

Cough cough cough…..

Uhhhhh, apparently it was a women and there are somewhat fewer than 60 babies killed. No word on whether or not it’s true that she was angry that Harry Reid (famous scumbag) stole her birth control pills because he wanted her to have an abortion.

Further updates when my connection gets here with my stash.

  1. […] was reading my NY Times style guide and realized I’d have to post a correction on my reportage of the incident at the Capitol the other […]

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