doubleplusundead

Two pretty funny and very stupid articles from Conservative Thinkers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! extraordinaire.

Let’s start with Peggy Noonan, cuz her writing has become so shallow it doesn’t take long to ridicule.

Reach Across the Aisle, Mr. President

When Democrats win elections, Republicans need to reach across the aisle. When Republicans win elections, Republicans need to reach across the aisle. When Trump wins an election in spite of everything people like Peggy Noonan could do, Republicans need to reach across the aisle.

With this Deep Thought!!!!!!!!!!

The priorities should be jobs, growth, social cohesion and an atmosphere, in Washington, of constructiveness.

Well, he appears to be doing okay on jobs and growth in his first two months.

Social cohesion is not a priority for gov’t. Destroying it has been the method our fine political betters have used to gain political power though.

As for ‘constructiveness’ in DC, how about the fucking Democrats try working with someone else? How about that Peggy?

Nope, conservatives need to bend their principles because we’re all disappointing Peggy.

Next up, Rich Lowry, you can tell he’s super conservative cuz he writes at Politico. How The GOP Crack-Up Happens!!!!!

That relationship is awkward and tenuous. It is an uneasy accommodation between a GOP Congress that would find a more natural partner in a President Rubio, Cruz or Bush, and a President Trump who would, presumably, be happier to work with Speaker Dave Brat — the populist congressman from Virginia — than with Speaker Paul Ryan.

Exactly. He’s forced to work with Establishment Pricks who are refusing to reduce any of their power.

This is a product of how the Republican sweep of 2016 was won on separate tracks. Trump tore up many Republican orthodoxies and went out and found a different way to unlock the electoral map, winning in the industrial Midwest. Congressional Republicans more or less stuck with the usual script, kept Trump at arm’s length, and held their majorities in the House and the Senate.

Yeah. They were elected to reverse what the Dems have been doing, most especially in terms of illegal immigration and Obamacare. But Thoughtful Conservatives Everywhere are telling us whoa, it’s not that simple! You can’t just do what the stupid voters want, that way lies madness!

And there was no off-the-shelf Trump legislation that Congress could begin on immediately.

You know, except reintroducing one of the previous 10 Obamacare repeal bills, building a wall, making Hillary Clinton ambassador to Libya…

The congressional priorities are Obamacare repeal and tax reform, both of which could easily have been the first-year agenda items of the aforementioned hypothetical Presidents Bush, Rubio, or Cruz.

Okay, that’s funny. Sure Republicans have been talking about that, but they’ve been studiously avoiding it.

And what huge issue is good old Rich avoiding? Do a ctrl-F and try to find “illegal” or even “immigration” and you’ll find that Rich did not discuss this issue that was front and center in Trump’s campaign. You might also call it his signature issue.

But that is an issue only for racists, like me, Rich likes him some cheap labor. Hey, his garden ain’t gonna garden itself.

Let’s have a little high-larious interlude: Dynasty Fight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Meghan McCain on Possible Chelsea Clinton Run: ‘What Fresh Hell Am I Living In?’

You’re in the one where Meghan McCain is considered a pundit and is paid to tell people what she ‘thinks’.

Bureaucrats Gone Wild!!!!!!!!!

The Chicago Police Department is investigating one of its officers after he helped three young girls found living in an abandoned home. The officer set up a GoFundMe page for the girls who were known as the Englewood Angels. The police department said the officer violated its policy by helping the girls…

Artz launched the effort (Gofundme) to raise money and supplies for the kids and the grandmother who agreed to take care of them. Dolores Anderson has a roof over her head and, for now, enough food and clothes to help raise her granddaughters who were found living in squalor just a few months ago…

Artz is accused of violating rule 52 which prohibits officers of seeking or soliciting contributions of any kind from anyone. The complaint against him was lodged by CPD Internal Affairs Commander Robert Klimas.

He had a box to check and check it he did!!!!!!

Saving New York From deBlasio!!

That’s the wrong formulation. You need to save NY from New Yorkers. They’re the ones who reelected the fool who spends all his time SJWing and not Mayoring. The guy who took their Big Gulps with extra salt. NYCers are the ones who voted in term limits and then reelected Bloomberg after he decided that there wouldn’t be term limits on him then elected de Commio.

New Zealand is focused, laser-like, on what’s important!

The local Māori tribe of Whanganui in the North Island has fought for the recognition of their river – the third-largest in New Zealand – as an ancestor for 140 years.

On Wednesday, hundreds of tribal representatives wept with joy when their bid to have their kin awarded legal status as a living entity was passed into law.

“The reason we have taken this approach is because we consider the river an ancestor and always have,” said Gerrard Albert, the lead negotiator for the Whanganui iwi [tribe].

Hey, at least they’re not still eating people.

So far as you know.

I would like the answer the most important question about this: Is the river a he or a she?

It’s a river. It’s gender is fluid!

*smack*

Sorry.

First gay cakes and now this!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? What the fuck?

A new business, run by a cake decorator…(was awarded) a Westland District Council project to build a $7 million sewage plant…

Sonomabatch. Can’t you just let them make cakes?

It’s like the Rose Bowl Parade except pornier.

Huge crowds flocked to the western Japanese city of Nagaoka Sunday to take part in a bizarre annual festival that sees women ride through the city streets on a giant wooden penis.

With an awesome gif that I can’t download or embed. Oh well.

Let’s end on a Decision.

On the one hand, may the force live long and prosper.

On the other hand, that’s an actual girl. No, really. It is.

When I went to NY last year I picked up my friend in Illinois, the ardent Dem. He told me he and his wife were coming to AZ in Feb or March. He showed up yesterday, out of the blue, and we hung out, that’s why I didn’t post. I had a bunch of links too.

He came down from Flagstaff to spend the afternoon in Mesa. We ate at a place called Blue Adobe in Mesa. It was okay, but not ‘authentic Mexican”. I’d call it California-Mexican. I’d rather eat at Filiberto’s. It tastes better and costs about 1/5 as much.