Archive for the ‘HAHAHAHAHAA!!!!’ Category

An object at laugh

mattis-babies

Will stay at laugh.

 

An object at Froth

global-worming

 

Tends to stay at Froth.

 

Picture Post!

Perception is everything.

buiding-an-ar15-vs-ak47

Contrary to what you were told

answers

 

Reality, she is a bitch.

haha

 

So…classy or do you think Abbi has some…history?

happy-birthday

 

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

he-who-laughs-last

 

Socialism For The Win!

isnt-socialism-great

 

Just cuz it ain’t as endy doesn’t mean it’s not even fucking funnier.

No, really. That happened.

 

How the press sees Trump

behind-the-curtain

How Trump sees the press

naughty-list

 

How I see the left

ralph-helping

 

We’re waiting for the chirp, chirp, chirp of an agenda being born!

yup

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For every action there’s an equal and stupid reaction.

Peggy Noonan is still upset we didn’t vote for Jeb!.  (and even more upset that exclamation point is sarcastic)

Here she is whining about Trump saying nice things to Teh Peepul and mean things to our betters.

He presented himself not as a Republican or a conservative but as a populist independent. The essential message: Remember those things I said in the campaign? I meant them. I meant it all.

She’s not used to that. All right-thinking pols know you say anything to get elected and then can safely ignore teh peepul until the next election.

Normally a new president has someone backing him up, someone publicly behind him. Mr. Obama had the mainstream media—the big broadcast networks, big newspapers, activists and intellectuals, pundits and columnists of the left—the whole shebang. He had a unified, passionate party. (You forgot the Look At The Great Creases! folks like you V)

Mr. Trump in comparison has almost nothing. The mainstream legacy media oppose him, even hate him, and will not let up. The columnists, thinkers and magazines of the right were mostly NeverTrump; some came reluctantly to support him.

His party is split or splitting. The new president has gradations of sympathy, respect or support from exactly one cable news channel, and some websites.

He really has no one but those who voted for him.

And the more you assholes talk the more people realize that all we have on our side is Trump.

 

Nother minitrue-mistake! that somehow made Spicer look bad. They dowdified a quote (cut it short to change the meaning).

I’m sure they’re sorry about it. Not sorry enough to stop lying, just sorry about getting caught.

 

Fakenewsers just don’t get it.

Secretary of State Rex Tillerson’s job running the State Department just got considerably more difficult. The entire senior level of management officials resigned Wednesday, part of an ongoing mass exodus of senior foreign service officers who don’t want to stick around for the Trump era.

No, his job just got easier, it was going to be very hard to fire all those anti-American assholes. The more quit the fewer he has to fire or ‘promote’ to his super-important think-tank! that thinks and can’t do.

 

I’m gonna get on a watch list I’m buying so much saltpeter for my simple, chronic boner.

 

Environmental Protection Agency employees have not accepted Donald Trump’s victory and are still “coming to work in tears” more than two months after the election.

“At EPA headquarters, the mood remains dark,” ProPublica reported Wednesday. “A longtime career communications employee said in a phone interview Tuesday that more than a few friends were ‘coming to work in tears’ each morning as they grappled with balancing the practical need to keep their jobs with their concerns for the issues they work on.”

 

I knew it would be good, but I didn’t realize how good.

 

Of course, the bureaucracy is going to be in a war with Trump for so long as he is POTUS.

Government employees from more than a dozen federal agencies in the United States have opened rogue Twitter accounts, concerned by what they see as President Trump’s attempts to stifle government scientific research and scale back the country’s Obama-era commitments to combating climate change.

I look forward to many, many, many, “You’re Fired!”s.

 

I’m not sure why the DNC is auditioning for Trump Re-Election folks, but there it is.

 

Keep America Great!

 

Someone tell Hollywood you only need to tithe, throwing $hundreds of millions away is not really a smart way to honor your religious beliefs.

Universal has won a heated bidding war to pick up the rights to Little America, a futuristic adventure movie that has Michael Bay and his Platinum Dunes on board to produce….

Described by sources as a “sci-fun” story rather than “sci-fi,” the tale is set in a dystopian future where a Donald Trump-like president has bankrupted America and China has called in its debts.

Geez, they picked the stupidest religion. I do find it hilarious that they claim Trump is going to bankrupt America. Obama and the fine GOP-led Congress already have that covered.

Now if they had us start blowing up Chinese armies when they call in their debts, that movie might actually make money. Too bad they won’t do that. China is paying for it after all.

 

Remember the vid of the kid proud of starting a fire at the We Hate Amerikkka riots the other day?  That was Drew Carey’s kid.

Jebus, didn’t he used to be a fucking libertarian?  What the fuck is wrong with the drugs in Hollywood?

 

In, There’s No Proof Of Voter Fraud (right Shep?) News.

This link has links to others talking about how illegal aliens vote all the time.

This one shows that the Green Party’s scam/recount effort uncovered plenty of voter fraud (just regular Dem voter fraud, probably not illegals)

In Michigan, where Trump has been certified the winner in spite of Stein’s efforts, Wayne County (Detroit), where Clinton overwhelmingly won, has come under fire explicitly due to the recount. Turns out in 37 percent of the Detroit precincts more votes were cast than the number of people who showed up to the polls to vote. No one would have noticed if not for the personal enrichment recall scheme of the former Green Party presidential candidate.

Oh man can I not wait until people like Shep, who declared that Foxnews Knows Of No Evidence Of Voter Fraud!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yesterday, have to talk about all the Democrat-Party-Bought-And-Paid-For Voter Fraud!.

That’s gonna be funny.

 

So….they raised the minimum wage and restaurants are closing!?!?!?!!?!?!? Shouldn’t that have increased jobs?

Upward of 60 restaurants around the Bay Area have closed since the start of September alone, with many citing difficulties like the cost of finding and keeping good employees, rising rents, new requirements for providing health care and sick leave, and doing it all while competing with the slew of new dining options.

Kudos for mentioning Obamacare and other Dem stupidities, but notice the elephant not in the room.

They have some stuff about how stupid people talk about minimum wage increases being responsible, but they let you know that’s crazy-talk.

Being a lefty means never admitting that you’re wrong. Especially to yourself.

 

At Paco’s the other day, commenter MikeW, mentioned that there’s a grain of truth in most Duffelblog posts.

Case in point.

A new plan touted by President Donald Trump to end the nearly six-year-long Syrian Civil War has reportedly stalled after the president and his staff realized they did not have enough different colors and (Risk V) pieces to represent all the different factions in the country, sources confirmed today…

Trump had planned to use a single colored army to represent “all the Syrians,” sources say, but he was apparently foiled once he realized there was no brown army. Instead, he began using blue for American forces, red for Russian, black for ISIS, gray for rebels, green for Turkey, and yellow for Kurds.

However, he realized there were not enough colors after the CIA presented a list of 12 former and current Al Qaeda affiliates that were also fighting inside the country, along with at least 30 other non-governmental tribes, armies, militias and terror groups.

Too many scorpions in that bucket.

This one gets to me.

Advisers from the Department of Defense have been trying in vain to persuade Trump to take a more nuanced and academically rigorous view of the conflict. So far they have only been successful in convincing him that “taking Australia on turn one and sitting on the Indonesian bottleneck until we can build up our forces” would be a terrible idea.

 

I always fall for that.

 

 

Dammit, they were doing so well.

 

Corruption Will Explode Under Trump!!!!!!!!!

BERLIN — People who turn to populist politicians promising to upset the status quo and end corruption may only be feeding the problem, an anti-corruption watchdog group warned Wednesday.

Transparency International said in its annual Corruption Perceptions Index for 2016 that in countries with populist or autocratic leaders, “instead of tackling crony capitalism, those leaders usually install even worse forms of corrupt systems.”

Man, they’re going all out to get him.

No, corruption explodes under corrupt gov’ts.

Let’s look and see! Now, I could go easy and just check the archives here to do some good, old, Obama/Clinton/typical Dem corruption, but let’s look to the opposite of a populist gov’t.

EUnuchstan!

Corruption is a growing problem in the EU because leaders have been busy dealing with other crises, it’s been claimed.

Those other crises? Started by EUnuch oligarchs.

 

Brazil is not populist but..

A judge, overseeing Brazil’s biggest corruption case, has died after the plane he was travelling in crashed off the coast of Rio de Janeiro.

Huh, I wonder if he knew anything about Clintonorruption?

 

Is this corruption or just a bunch of slimy EUnuchs?

Parliament must vote on whether the government can start the Brexit process, the Supreme Court has ruled.

See, just because they pretend to have a democracy that doesn’t mean that the oligarchs have to listen to votes they don’t like.

I do like this

But the court ruled the Scottish Parliament and Welsh and Northern Ireland assemblies did not need a say.

It’s funny how little the English have changed in the last 10 centuries.

The answer to the first question is, of course, Both! They’re corrupt and slimy!

That is why we have Trump. Of course, Europe doesn’t usually get a Trump, they get Napoleon, Hitler, Attilla, Theodoric and other dictators.

Good luck EUnuchstanian oligarchs!

 

Man do I feel sorry for these poor bastards.

Desertification and poverty, compounded by Boko Haram’s violence, have left 11 million people desperately in need of aid – more than 7 million surviving, if they can, on one meal a day.

Alarm bells about the humanitarian catastrophe in Nigeria, Cameroon, Chad and Niger have been sounded by the United Nations.

So it’s either starve or die under the guns of the Religion of Peace or be forced to be sex slaves for UN ‘Peacekeepers’. That’s some choice.

 

Let’s Trump for a while.

Popcorn‘s a poppin’! We saw the beginning of this yesterday.

 

PRESS: The election was hacked.

TRUMP: There was a lot of voter fraud.

PRESS: That’s ridiculous. Where’s your evidence? I demand an investigation!

TRUMP: Okay, we’ll do an investigation: President Donald Trump Vows to Launch ‘Major Investigation’ Into Alleged Voter Fraud.

Hardee har har har.

I’m watching Spicer’s press conference and the media seems not so interested in an actual investigation. Huh, why it’s almost as if they’re Dem operatives trying to keep Dem voter fraud alive!

 

Okay, this is awesome and necessary.

Trump’s Generals, Pt. 1: President’s security pros replace Obama political ‘hacks’

I can’t wait until Pt. 2, replacing the political generals who Obama wanted to make sure would fire on American citizens.

Is Trump the perfect successor to Obama? It will take someone with a lot of energy and ability to keep his eye on the ball to gut all the socialist/hate-Amerikkka things Obama’s done to our nation.

 

Saying the right things,

Our gross national debt has increased to almost $20 trillion,” Mulvaney said. “That number is so large as to defy description. I choose to look at it another way: to an ordinary American family, that translates to a credit card bill of $260,000. Families know what that would mean for them. It is time for government to learn the same lesson.”

Continuing, Mulvaney said he felt “as a matter of principle” that the debt is problem that requires immediate action.

 

We’re so boned over debt, I hope Trump and his peeps have an idea. Since so many people like to pretend there is such a thing as International Law, is there a provision for bankruptcy? I picture Tillerson letting all his calls go to voicemail.

Asking the question, Do you have to be a conservative to launch a conservative group?

Former presidential candidate Evan McMullin and his running mate Mindy Finn will launch a new conservative group on Wednesday that’s opposed to President Trump,

The answer? Of course not. So long as you can be used to attack Trump you can call yourself whatever the hell you want.

 

The Senate keeps losing Trump’s VA pick’s paperwork!

Sources close to the nominee confirmed that repeated calls to Senate leaders with questions about his claim have so far gone nowhere, since he is immediately placed on hold just seconds after dialing.

Roughly seven hours and 160 iterations of Bernie Sanders singing “Pineapple Pen” later, the only answer Shulkin has received was an automated message explaining that “all Cabinet nominations are confirmed in the order they are received.”

 

Sonomabatch!

 

I didn’t realize that kangaroos were in the Mob! Which leads us to Joey, The ‘Roo, Valachi!

A truck driver who transported kilograms of meth, cocaine and ecstasy from Sydney to Western Australia has been jailed for more than 16 years for his integral part in the interstate syndicate – which was foiled, in part, by a seven-foot kangaroo.

I hope Oz has a  good witness protection program.

 

High Praise! to Harvey for finding an article on Where’s Waldo with links to stories about Where’s Waldo trivia.

I though Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots: The Movie and Hungry, Hungry Hippos: The TV show were bad, but this is redonculus.

EXCLUSIVE: Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg are in talks to come aboard Where’s Waldo, the live-action MGM film based on the Classic Media franchise about the wool hatted-kid you spot in the crowd.

Is there nobody in Hollywood who can think? If you gonna have a movie about one-panel comics, how about The Fucking Far Fucking Side or Calvin and Fucking HOBBES@!@!1jihoawefljdkh you stupid sonsomabatches@!@!!@#!

Sorry, I get wound up. Where was I?

Oh yeah, is it me or are these people missing the whole point?

 

Now if I had both eyes, I’m pretty sure I’d be a retired Marine right now so I can generally be counted on to support them, but contrary to popular claims, free beer can be bad beer.

Soon after President Donald Trump signed an executive order to authorize construction of the Keystone Pipeline, a large portion of the nation’s military service members applauded the move as a helpful step towards more accessible domestic beer.

That is until Marine Pvt. Jeff Ertley visited the existing length of pipeline while on leave and was disappointed to discover the 1,179-mile pipeline is actually not full of Keystone Light.

 

Jebus. Life is too short to drink horse piss. We should have kept Germany or Belgium if we wanted good beer.

 

 

 

 

IMPORTANT ABOVE THE POST UPDATE!!!!!!

 

Sean Spicer is all about teh awesome. He lays into the media for more than 4 minutes, briefed them for a minute and then walked out.

My Schadenboner is at full staff!

schadenboner

 

Now, back to our post!

There’s not much to blog about. I’m pretty well sick of talking about all the crap done by the gov’t in the past and I can’t talk about what Trump’s going to do because nobody knows.

All there is to blog about is laughing at the media’s sad faces. Which is funny but I’m worried about having a schadenboner for more than 4 hours at a time, I have to ration myself.

Let’s laugh at some Chicago-machine politics.

State’s evidence?

President Barack Obama made his final grants of clemency on Thursday with less than a day left in office, and imprisoned former Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich was not on the list.  (from a linked article V)

…..and you will sit in that corner until you are n o longer a threat to the legacy of Sparklefarts and various statutes of limitations have expired for others.

We’ve seen murderers kill, get arrested, stand trial, serve prison time, be released and end up laid out on a slab at the morgue in less time than Blago will be serving.

 

Now wouldn’t that be funny if Blago decided to explain how Obama was only upset because he wasn’t getting his cut? Well, funny until Blago commits suicide in his cell and is shot trying to escape.

 

In Akbar Britain news,

I’ve always lived in London….

London is in my heart and in my blood, but the wind has changed, like it did for Mary Poppins, and I think it’s going to blow me out of the city, all the way to Tel Aviv…

There’s a train of thought among right-thinking people in London at the moment that Israel is culpable; that it is responsible for all the ills of the Palestinians, all the woes of the Middle East. If it weren’t for Israel, they say, the world would be a better place. If you go to a dinner party you can hear things that wouldn’t have sounded unfamiliar in 1930s Germany. They say they’re just ‘anti-Zionist’ but to be anti-Zionist is to be anti-Semitic. No one is anti- any other country. No one questions, say, Iran’s right to exist.

 

Except this time the Jews are heading back to Israel. Reaspora?  via my favorite smell

 

In global warmmongering news, The Hottest Year Ever!!!!!!! might not be so hot.

For the benefit of science reporters and other people who are unfamiliar with the scientific method, let me point out that the margin of error for these measurements is plus or minus one tenth of a degree Celsius. The temperature difference that is supposedly being measured is one one-hundredth of a degree—one tenth the size of the margin of error. To go back to sports reporting, that’s like saying that the football is on the 10-yard line—give or take a hundred yards.

 

I know it’s been the warmist winter since I moved to AZ, I’ve had to wear 3 or 4 shirts when I sit outside at night to have my evening cigar and read my book. It’s been below 70 for weeks except for one or two days.

 

Trump’s first executive order was directed at Obamacare!

President Donald Trump signed his first executive order on Friday, heading into the Oval Office shortly after his inaugural parade to direct agencies to ease regulations associated with Obamacare, the signature healthcare law of his predecessor that Trump has vowed to replace.

That’s a shot across the bows of the GOP and their planned Failure Theater on getting rid of Obamacare. I especially like the Dem I saw on some news channel yesterday who claimed they needed the Dem party to pass something to replace it.

Ummmmm, no. That’s not according to the rules the Dems put in place and one thing I’m sure of is that Trump is going to hammer the GOP over that and bypass the media via Twitter, which they’ll have to cover, to get some OUTRAGE!!!!! pointed at the GOP.

 

I didn’t realize Trump was forming his re-election committee so soon.

Shia LaBeouf has launched a four-year-long protest against Donald Trump — creating a continuous public live-stream in Queens to broadcast people shouting “He will not divide us!” over and over again.

The exhibit, set up outside the Museum of the Moving Image in Astoria, was led by Jaden Smith Friday as the new POTUS was being sworn in.

 

Keep America Great!

 

Jean Has A Long Moustache!

 

Invasion Tomorrow!

Going ashore

Of course, this time it’s the forces of fascism who are planning on blowing up trains and stations.

I’m posting this tonight because I’m in AZ so by the time I get up, Trump might just be POTUS! My last post under Obama!

Or… my last post before Obama gets his Emergency Powers!!!!!! on and we start to pick up Radio Free Texas here in AZ telling us if John’s mustache is indeed long.

In an absolutely stunning CNN segment, the anti-Trump cable news networks media analyst Brian Stelter floated the idea that the impending Trump presidency is an actual national emergency.

…Remember, Obama has already ordered an investigation into supposed Russian hacking of the elections to specifically help Trump. What aired on CNN Sunday could very easily have been the beginnings of a media narrative leading to Obama announcing that his investigation has found direct connections between Russia and Trump’s campaign and therefore he has to declare a national emergency and stay in office until either Clinton is pushed through or a new election (minus Trump) is held.

…it is strikingly obvious that the entire establishment is doing everything in their power to stop Trump from ever taking office…

 

Mmmmm, that’s good paranoia.

I’m not accepting that Trump will be POTUS until Saturday.

 

The awesomeness that will hopefully be our future.

RUSH (Limbaugh V): This John Lewis business, Trump… I’m telling you, folks, the guy… They just can’t intimidate him, they can’t scare him, they can’t shut him up. He’s back tweeting about John Lewis. Now, you would think that after the press barrage of the last couple of days their effort to shame Trump for, “How dare you attack this man who was beat up on the Pettus Bridge in Selma 50 years ago? How dare you attack him! How dare you?” Trying to shame Trump. “You attack John Lewis, civil rights icon?” So Trump tweets out, “John Lewis lied. He said mine is the first inauguration he’s not gonna attend.

 

It’ll be very entertaining no matter what.

 

So… OUTRAGE!!!!!! monger, Megyn Kelly, left Foxnews and boy are they missing her!

Since taking over for Megyn Kelly, who departed earlier this month for NBC News, ratings in the 9 p.m. time slot have seen double-digit increases.

 

I’ve been flipping to Tucker Carlson a bunch, he’s a hoot. Last night he should have shut off that congresscritters mic, the guy wouldn’t shut up and kept denying what he had just said.

Just flipped to his show and caught a chilling video of a 1o-12 year old boy who had started a fire in the street protesting Trump. I’m seriously sure that his parents are very proud of him.

See? Fucking chilling. The rest of the vid is very educational.

 

Speaking of Megs, is she working yet? I can’t find anything online about it. Once she’s at NBC, I do look forward to lefties’ about-face on her being Eva Braun.

I also look forward to her daily OUTRAGES!!!!!! about Trump, NBC probably has that in the contract.

 

Fake News! Lives! It seems that maybe, just maybe, Putin would have preferred the person he’s been bribing for a long time who is the wife of another of Putin’s bribees?!!?!?!?

But inside the Kremlin, the initial euphoria over having a Putin admirer in the White House is giving way to skepticism that any meaningful detente with the U.S. can be achieved, according to four senior officials in Moscow.

 

There was no “euphoria” in the Kremlin, there’s probably a profound sadness that their bitch is leaving office.

The next time someone tells you Putin wanted Trump more than Hillary, ask them if Putin would want Trump more than Obama. If that person says, “Yes”, then you can safely ignore anything that person says.

 

In Akbar Britain News, Adhan!

Islamic CALL TO PRAYER Held Inside Historic British CATHEDRAL

Cultural suicide is very sad. Especially since that’s the ’empire’ that most Americans equate most with Rome.

 

In, Not Getting Trump News, this guy does not seem to understand Trump.

Trump intends to offer Putin the sanctions lift in exchange for a deal on a nuclear arms cut…

we can say that the Russians are simply bargaining…

 

Wait, you mean Trump might end up in negotiations with Putin? Oh Noes!!!!!!! He’s never done that before!

 

In SSR news,

“I’ve (President Me V) said before, I expect Russia and Ukraine to have a strong relationship. They are historically bound together in all sorts of cultural and social ways,”

Yeah, they’ve had a very strong relationship since the 30s, they call it Holodomor.

 

What’s this “We” shit Fakenewser? (warning, Wash Post/Minitrue link)

A free press is all of us now

You assholes are on your own. Don’t get me involved in your lie-inflicted disaster, especially after attacking me for decades.

 

The South China Morning Post used to be a good paper. Now that the commies have taken over Hong Kong, it’s just a mouthpiece of the gov’t.

Let’s point and laugh!

China doesn’t want to be America!

I’d say that depends on which China you talk to, the thugocrats or the rest of the country.

 

This one slays me. Trump is just like Mao!

US president-elect Donald Trump could be the true heir of Mao Zedong, according to several China experts in the US who see many identical traits ­between the two men.

Although it does confuse me, is Mao bad now or is Trump good or are Minnie Chan and her editor headed for census duty in the Uighur province?

What’s not confusing is that China’s already told us which POTUS is just like Mao.

obamao

 

Staying with our eastern motif, Engrish!

engrish-win

I bet that’s some fucking sale.

Coupla Dave Barry links.

Sometimes a crime just makes sense.

A MAN dressed as a beer bottle is being sought by police after allegedly stealing two pizzas

I wonder if alcohol was involved.

For those who don’t know, Dave Barry has a fear of squirrels (he must live somewhere they don’t allow dogs or guns), so he’s upset about this.

Squirrel Appreciation Day is observed annually on January 21.

 

Me? I appreciate squirrels, they’re delicious.

My father’s favorite recipe

Leave whole rub inside & out with olive oil, salt & pepper; stuff cavity with celery leaves and mushrooms; bake at 350 about 1/2 hour or until done. DO NOT PARBOIL BEFORE BAKING. They should taste like a Squirrel. If you insist on parboiling drink the water and throw the Squirrel away.

You too can appreciate squirrels! I don’t use mushrooms though, you can substitute turkey stuffing.

 

Let’s end on one of Trump’s most OUTRAGEOUS!!!!!! OUTRAGES!!!!!! and how it’s viewed by the people who know.

Remarks from President-elect Donald Trump earlier this week calling NATO allies ‘obsolete’ have been labeled completely unprecedented by everyone except the thousands of American soldiers who have fought alongside them in Afghanistan, sources confirmed today.

 

That’s one of those things All The Right People cannot admit.

I’ve decided that we won’t end on that, let’s end on this instead!

vote-trump

Good luck America. Tomorrow it might just get a whole lot funnier to go with the all the extra endiness caused by Obama’s last months.

And the Acela corridor is gonna get such a facecocking!

 

Let’s start with some of the least happy people in the country, our fine, totally non-aligned, media betters!

CNN ran a fake news story trying to malign a Trump appointee. I know, I’ll have to narrow that down. A lot. The latest was Tom Price for HHS. It was a lie, as CNN is wont to broadcast, so Trump sent them a letter telling them to correct their lies.

First on CNN: Trump’s Cabinet pick invested in company, then introduced a bill to help it”

 

Funny , they didn’t seem to be able to tell the truth about the Goldman Sachs revolving door in the Obama admin, where they worked on regulations regulating Goldman Sachs and then went back to work there, but the media is ready, willing and (differently) abled to lie about Trump!

So at least they’re fair in one sense, they lie about both sides, it’s just that they lie to make their favorite party look good and their hated enemy look bad.

 

The Atlanta-Journal (we hate the) Constitution saw Trump make their congresscritter look like the lying sack of shit he is, so they did what our fine media betters do when Teh Peepul might find out the wrong (true) thing.

In its apparent haste to do so, a pair of journalists at the paper committed a colossal math blunder vastly understating the city’s crime rate. With that mistake, the paper made the city look over 13 times safer than it really is.

They made a “mistake”, which, like all Minitrue mistakes, makes the Dem look good and the Republican look like a liar.

 

So after more than a year of the media lyingly attack Trump the Columbia “Journalism” Review wants to make sure that Trump doesn’t get all uppity at his media betters.

In these final days before your inauguration, we thought it might be helpful to clarify how we see the relationship between your administration and the American press corps.

Good start, smug, superior and snotty. The three S’ of modern “Journalism”.

. You’ve taken to Twitter to taunt and threaten individual reporters and encouraged your supporters to do the same

Yeah, ones who wrote blatantly dishonest articles, like the asshole above lying about his HHS pick.

I could spend all day on this bit of jackassery, but let’s get to the first lie

You’ve ridiculed a reporter who wrote something you didn’t like because he has a disability.

That’s right, there’s dispute about that, but just go with the worst interpretation of anything to do with Trump, that’s what “Journalists” do.

But while you have every right to decide your ground rules for engaging with the press, we have some, too.

Those are Lie, Lie, Distort and Lie.

Off the record and other ground rules are ours—not yours—to set.

Because they’re Important! and The Arbiters Of What Should Be!! ( of course, if a Dem wants to go off the record, he could just shove them into a closet. )

We decide how much airtime to give your spokespeople and surrogates

Bwahahaahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahaha. Still smarting from giving him all that free campaigning during the election?

The funniest line of the article.

We believe there is an objective truth, and we will hold you to that.

Liars. You will hold him to the community-based TRUTH!!!!!!! that bears little resemblance to reality.

We will set higher standards for ourselves than ever before.

To lie and distort more than ever before! Yeah, we’ve been watching. That’s why we have Trump.

Eh, I could either put that article in its own post or stop here, this one is going to get too long.

I’ll just make fun of CJR using another of their articles.  The CJR is to “journalism” what Tom Sawyer is to Aunt Polly’s fence.

They’re writing about how people keep using Duffel Blog as a real news source.

I’d like to make fun of this

has duped multiple outlets with his fake newsflashes….

No, they were not ‘duped’. That implies intent. They were sloppy and wrote articles based on a site despite having never seen it before, they didn’t even click on the “about” link (read that, it’s hilarious) before they ran with their “SCOOPS!”. That’s why we have Shep.

The CJR, all about protecting the lies and laziness of lazy, stupid, ignorant and biased reporters since……so long as I’ve read them.

 

Speaking of the lying asshole who is famous for being beaten by Democrats, John Lewis!

Trump should shrug off John Lewis’ cookie-cutter insults

No, he shouldn’t. The more he hammers that shit, the more Minitrue defends blatant lies and vicious, dishonest attacks, the more the curtain is pulled back, the less power lying assholes like the CJR, CNN, the rest of Minitrue, the Democratic party, the GOP  and the rest of the establishment assholes have over our nation.

 

Eh, enough minitrue for a while.

Yesterday I wrote about how Obama is making staffers into GS types, I didn’t realize exactly how slimy he was about it.

s, including senior adviser Valerie Jarrett and National Security Adviser Susan Rice….Ben Rhodes was appointed…

With this hopeful bit

“This is entirely consistent with the executive authority that’s vested in the White House

Yeah, I know another POTUS who is itching to use that authority.

President-elect Donald Trump may take four or five (needs more zeroes V) executive actions on Friday, the day he is sworn into office, spokesman Sean Spicer said.

I figure he could work in a few “You’re Fired!”s.

 

I wonder, will Geneva be so solicitous  when Trump comes to visit?

Security blanketed the United Nations’ European headquarters on Wednesday to avoid any risk or embarrassment to visiting Chinese President Xi Jinping, while police swiftly ended a small pro-Tibetan protest on the square outside.

Sorry, I like to make myself laugh. Xi is a respected world leader while Trump is a dangerous demagogue.

 

Okay, this makes me laugh.

Iowa lawmakers are considering a bill that would allow a woman who gets an abortion to sue the doctor who performed the procedure if she experiences emotional distress later.

The “emotional distress” bit makes me laugh a little more. “Won’t someone think of the poor, distraught, hurting women?”

I’m agin it, but if our fine lefty betters want to be able to sue a gun maker for someone using their product in an illegal manner, a woman should be able to sue a doctor for killing a baby in a legal manner.

For Social Justice!

 

It’s funny how totally tolerant, non-racists today want all the same things the racist back then wanted. Huh, they’re all Democrats too!?!?

Why, it’s almost as if the Democratic party is the party of racism!

 

I’m not sure if the story is true (I don’t know the blogger), but it’s TRUE! in a greater sense in that it accurately reflects reality.

…Unlike most parents, he had no interest in calling the parents of my bullies to ‘open up a dialogue’ or some other such tripe. Instead, he planned to teach me to kick a little ass.

My Mother balked at this idea. She didn’t think little girls should be fighting…

When the boys confronted me again, I dared them to mess with me. One ballsy kid lunged towards me with the intent of pushing me down. Quickly, I kicked that kid squarely between the legs with my skate. He crumpled to the ground as I hysterically screamed at his friends, “I’LL EAT YOUR EYES! I’LL EAT ALL OF YOUR EYES!” Terrified, those boys got up and ran like Hell. I’ve never felt so empowered in my entire life.

 

All the advice is good, I grew up in a bad neighborhood and I had to use much of that. Never show fear, doubt or pain. Do act as if you are eager for the fight.

I feel sorry for those people. So paralyzed by fear of what might happen, that they lack the courage to stand up for themselves or for someone weaker. I refuse to live my life afraid to say what I feel or do what is right because there might be some mysterious villain lurking in the shadows who is bigger and stronger. Better to be dead, than to live your life afraid.

Hmmm, could that last bit be made more pithy?

dont_tread_on_meyellow_sticker

 

A Post headline from their wheelhouse.

Broncos hired new coach aware of ‘sleaze ball’ penis-rubbing past (note: he allegedly rubbed his penis on others.)

They live for that shit.

 

 

No, I’m not playing some 80s music. How about a paean to the working man in honor of Trump?

(It starts real slow, so I’ve jumped to when the music starts. Shroeder is a little bitch so they have to play without him)

 

Not as good as Hey Ya, but still pretty good.

Let’s start with some EUnuchstanian Cause totally not Effect!!!!!!!!!!!

Right now global worming is so strong it’s recordly cold in EUnuchstan, they have mostly electric heat apparently.

So in France

“Avoid sending too many emails with large attachments” is among the power-saving measures suggested to the French public in order to prevent overloading the national grid during this week’s cold spell.

France is facing fears that a national power shortage could lead to widespread cuts.

In Amsterdam,

Amsterdam and the surrounding areas were plunged into darkness at 4.15 am local time leaving at least 364,000 customers without power

That’s why I never hit “reply all”.

 

In Akbar Britain

Britain will leave the EU’s single market when it exits the EU, putting an end to speculation that London might try to seek a “soft Brexit”….

Theresa May said….

That totally did not lead to this.

Sterling rose after May…

In the minutes that followed her comment, the UK pound surged 2.5% to an 11-day high of $1.2347.

The UK pound also gained more than 1.5% to 86.69% against the euro.

Politicians can screech about anything, but people who put their money where their mouth is cannot afford to ignore reality. (You know, except for the NYTimesWashPostCNNABCCBSNBCetc., they delight in losing money, but it’s a religious contribution. Think of it as tithing).

 

In Let’s Fuck The Country As Much As Possible Before I Leave news, Obama!

First, get those political appointees in the GS crew!

President Obama rushed to fill nearly 100 federal government vacancies during a frenzy of appointments in his final few weeks in office.

Since the new year, Obama has named 72 people to federal job openings and nominated another 17 for positions requiring Senate confirmation, according to CBS reporter Mark Knoller…..

The wave of announcements includes several White House officials, who will serve well after Obama leaves office. (I doubt they’ll serve well V)

 

Dick.

Next, Let’s Get The Country Even More Riled Up And Rioting with a politicized Dept. of “Justice” report on Chicago’s Cops!

Page 2, paragraph 3: 60 ride-alongs
Given that there are 279 police beats, three watches, that’s 837 potential ride-alongs. Not to mention rapid response, traffic, 06, tact, saturation, gang enforcement, boats, horses, god knows how many administrative and undercover beats, there’s probably nearly 1,200 potential ride-alongs in a 24 hour period. The DOJ claims they spent “300 person-days” here, that’s 360,000 opportunities to ride-along.
.016% – sixteen thousandths of one percent….

In other words, people with ingrained prejudices against the police, people with histories versus the police, people whose livelihood relies on suing the police – people with axes to grind. How many of these “interviewees” fit into one or more of those categories? How many were selected at random, or did they all volunteer to come forward with their stories? We know that certain retirees who left or resigned under investigation were all to eager to sit with the DOJ to air their supposed “grievances.”

More importantly, how many of these stories fall outside the supposed window of 2011 to 2016? Some? Many? All? We don’t know because in every single example cited throughout the report, no dates are given. Some of these stories could be ten or twenty years old. Maybe more, seeing as how they bring up Burge who has been gone for almost 25 years now (Wait, they’re blaming Iowahawk now? V)

 

Listen, he needed to rush that out before he left office so they could get the conclusion that whitewashes Rahm Emmanual and the Chicago political machine. Geez, these guys are cops in Chicago, you’d think they  understand that.

 

Since the commie lost here, let’s help the one left in Cuba!

The State Department, under Obama’s direction, signed a new law-enforcement agreement with Cuba Monday that seeks to deepen America’s newfound diplomatic roots with the island nation,…

(from USA Today linked article)Notably, the agreement did not include a return of U.S. fugitives that Cuba has harbored, including New Jersey cop killers, Black Panther hijackers and Puerto Rican terrorists.

Rhodes reiterated last month that Obama’s foreign policy with Cuba has been designed to be as “irreversible” as possible for President-elect Donald Trump.

 

Fuckhead.

Obama’s taking Airforce One, not home, but on another vacay we get to pay for.

TMZ reports that the family will board a helicopter after leaving the Capitol on Friday which will take them to Andrews Air Force Base, where they will board a government plane for the trip out west.

 

The article says that Obama will have to pay to get home but I bet a  dollar that in a month, when he wants to go back to DC, it’s going to be a National Emergency That Trump Refuses To Fly Him And His Family home On Air Force One!

 

So, did Obama fail?

As the debate continues over repeal of the Affordable Care Act and what might replace it, a growing share of Americans believe that the federal government has a responsibility to make sure all Americans have health care coverage, according to a new Pew Research Center survey.

Currently, 60% of Americans say the government should be responsible for ensuring health care coverage for all Americans, compared with 38% who say this should not be the government’s responsibility.

That’s 60% of Americans who are in favor of socialism. Cuz it’s fair.

 

The perfect Tabloid Headline For Our Tabloid POTUS!

Chelsea Handler blames the Kardashians for Donald Trump’s win

I don’t really have anything to say about that except for the perfect tabloidedness of the headline.

 

Minitrue, don’t ever change.

US, Baltic states sign military pacts as Trump uncertainty grows

Until you are all out of work.

An accurate headline would be, “US, Baltic states sign military pacts as Putin uncertainty grows” but our fine minitrue betters know who the real enemy is.

 

I bet Cleveland wishes they had loyal movers like this.

Two dozen moving companies from the San Diego area have vowed not to assist the Chargers in their move to Los Angeles. The group of movers publicly expressed their displeasure and their stone-cold commitment to not lending a helping hand on the website WeWontMoveYouChargers.com.

Heh. So long as movers don’t refuse to get Obama the hell out of the White House this is protected free speech!

 

Apparently SyFy movies have lied to me.

 

Where are the screams, the blood, the fully filled bikinis? Sonomabatch.

 

Duffel Blog has really been on a roll, The History of the Battleship in 15 Awesome Pictures!

The USS Maine was America’s second commissioned battleship. Ordered in 1886, launched in 1890 and commissioned in 1895, she was both over budget and obsolete by the time she entered service, setting a precedent for every Navy project since.

In 1898 she made her decisive contribution to victory in the Spanish-American War by exploding at anchor in Havana….

…saw the development of the “battlecruiser,” which had the armament of a battleship but not its protection. Relying solely on speed, it was basically the equivalent of walking up to Tito Ortiz while thinking: “What if I just hit him as hard as I can and then run?”

….“the most successful type of capital ship yet designed.” Today she is best known for the footage of her destruction after being torpedoed by a German submarine in November 1941, shown above in Movietone News, and shown below in the 1989 music video for the Red Hot Chili Peppers cover of Stevie Wonder’s “Higher Ground”.

…Like the USS Maine, this event (Pearl Harbor V) reinforced the relevance of the battleship’s role in galvanizing the American public for war by blowing up at anchor.

Read the whole thing, it’s high-larious.