Archive for the ‘It’s Always a Good Time to include Sheldon Cooper PhD’ Category

Above The Post Important, Oral Sex!!!!!!!!!!!!, Update!!!!!!

“And I do swallow.”

At least she’s accepted who her likely taker are.



Now, back to our posts in its entireties!

I saw this in drafts, I’m not sure when I wrote it, but it’s prepping the battlespace, against me, so here it is.



DHS says (pdf warning!!!) we need to stop saying words like ‘jihad’ and ‘sharia‘.

I’m fer stopping using those words, let’s use ones like “Crusade” (as in, “Let’s win the Crusades this time!!!!), and “don’t own slaves or beat your wife!”

But that’s not all that important as that report is only useful for surrendering to jihadis who want to implement sharia or for Americans to make fun of it.

I know which I am.

This report focuses on the spread of violent extremist ideology and the recruitment of American youth to extremist groups,

In other words, violent, extremist tea party ideology not islamic.

To effectively address and conquer the challenge of violent extremism,

Notice again “violent extremism”, they do not mean Islamic, they mean me and other people who think the Constitution is the foundation of the govt’s power.

Many experts expressed concerns that funding is tied to the same agencies that have law enforcement mandates or that CVE stigmatizes some of the very communities it seeks to help, notably the American Muslim communities

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying we should stigmatize Muslim communities, it seems Islamists and “moderate” Muslims do that enough for all of us, but notice “some” immediately defend the American Muslim community. The “some” being the ‘journalist’.

But the point of the deal is that the ‘very communities’ it should seek to help is America, not just Muslim communities in America.

The United States Government must take all forms of violent extremism and radicalization seriously, prioritizing those forms that pose the greatest threats to safety and security, most urgently.

In other parts of the world, that “all forms” bit means “Israel”, when the Obama admin says it, they mean me. People who think the Constitution means something are the greatest threats to our fine oligarchical “elitist” assholes.

To include those that espouse and/or undertake violence justified through various ideologies, to include anarchists, sovereign citizens, white-supremacists, and others.

Once again, they do not say “Islamic”, because they mean me.

They eventually get around to discussing ISIS (ISIL as they call it. I wonder why? They call themselves ISIS) but then they go off the tracks.

we have constructed language in daily use that promotes an “us and them” narrative of division

And they want to stop that Narrative Of Division! See, just cuz they want to kill us doesn’t mean we should make it all confrontational.


Coupla other funnies.

s to fight child exploitation, including the plights of child soldiers and child slavery.

So, they’re going to get us out of the UN? Most of that stuff is Africa, but as we’ve seen, ISIS is all about child soldiers and child slave-wives.

Sigh. That’s what we can expect more of if Hillary! wins.

Last night, before the debate, I wrote this next post but I didn’t post it because it went in a totally different direction than I was expecting.


I had a long post about how maybe voting Hillary! might be a good idea. Seriously.

I’d been thinking about what happens after the election and, maybe I’m just crazy, but neither one is likely to make 6 months as POTUS.

We get Trump as POTUS and ytou know our fine establishment betters, with Minitrue’s help, can whip an impeachment tout suite, so he’s probably immediately impeached and kicked out (The empire strikes back!!) so goes on to his new reality show, “Who Wants To Be POTUS?” or possibly a presidential trivia game show.

We get Pence, which is probably a best case case.

Hillary! won’t last because I could see her getting sworn in and passing out in public in about ohhhh….. 8 minutes. January in DC can be a scorching 50 degrees, so we get Kaine.

Then I got to the part about being either Pence or Kaine.

[#Beginning of Shooting Data Section] Nikon D3X 1/9/2013 13:24:03.66 Time Zone and Date: UTC-5, DST:OFF RAW (14-bit) Image Size: L (6048 x 4032), FX Lens: 85mm f/1.4G Artist: Copyright: Focal Length: 85mm Exposure Mode: Manual Metering: Matrix Shutter Speed: 1/200s Aperture: f/7.1 Exposure Comp.: 0EV Exposure Tuning: ISO Sensitivity: ISO 100 Optimize Image: White Balance: Preset manual d-1, 0, 0 Focus Mode: AF-C AF-Area Mode: Single AF Fine Tune: OFF VR: Long Exposure NR: OFF High ISO NR: OFF Color Mode: Color Space: Adobe RGB Tone Comp.: Hue Adjustment: Saturation: Sharpening: Active D-Lighting: Normal Vignette Control: Normal Auto Distortion Control: Picture Control: [SD] STANDARD Base: [SD] STANDARD Quick Adjust: 0 Sharpening: 3 Contrast: Active D-Lighting Brightness: Active D-Lighting Saturation: 0 Hue: 0 Filter Effects: Toning: Map Datum: Image Authentication: OFF Dust Removal: [#End of Shooting Data Section]

Dude has crazy eyes. Seriously. That’s him at what his people think is his best, non-crazy eyes, it’s cropped from his official picture,

Now, I could see them planning on him stepping down after appointing as VP somebody like… who? Nancy Pelosi? That’s funny. For about 2 seconds. Bernie? Maybe that’s why he shut up, or I’m not sure who, but someone the Dem leadership likes ain’t gonna be good.

Alternatively….Kaine decides it’s good to be king. That’s funny too. For about 6 seconds.


If Hillary! wins, we get Hillary! as POTUS or we get to watch a hard-left vs establishment pricks civil war with parts of minitrue ignoring it and/or taking different sides so we’re still definitely boned as they agree on pretty much everything except who gets the biggest seat at the trough. It might be funnier than watching Trump get impeached but we’d still be boned.


In either case, there’s the wildcard of the Obama admin and Minitrue going crazy and we the people are boned if Trump wins or them going a little less crazy if Hillary! wins but we’re still boned as they go after us in their Chicago-machine/jackbooted way.

So we’re back to the .50BMG or unkown gun choice.

We do have one thing going for us.

Cleveland made it to the World Series, now all we need is Chicago to get in and we’ll at least have a date before which WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It would make the whole end of civilization funnier if it kept either team from winning the Series. As we all know, whoever’s in charge of this sorry ball of mud has a very twisted sense of humor.



“This room is full of mirrors,” the Queen was heard to tell the President as she led him into the Oak Room.


And I bet a dollar he was too stupid to understand she just called him a narcissistic tool.

Cuz he’s an idiot.

Quoth the Belgian Interior minister:


“A significant section of the Muslim community danced when attacks took place,”


Yeah, I heard that too.


no tango class





Harvey at IMAO (one of FrnakJ’s calmer personalities) links this bit of highlarity about how Scientists! can now predict Crimes!!!!!!!!

Harvey, not a fan of illegal immigration, says,

My prediction: the violent criminal aliens gutless liberals protect in sanctuary cities.

Yeah, but I’d say he’s missing the point.

These people are trying to get a computer to do the profiling people are not allowed to do (unless they’re profiling white men as future slave owners).

They’ve made a computer program that looks at prior felonious behavior (wife-beating in this case to keep the SJWs away), but it could, I’d assume, be almost as good as me at predicting that people who commit crimes are likely to commit crimes (and/or terrorism and/or corruptionism) again.

That’s not Science!!! folks, it’s common fucking sense.

Which is about as common as a politician who gives shit one about America.

We’ll know if we can trust the next asshole by whether or not they go after Obamacare and/or the immigration crap. i.e. the reasons they won the last election.

When I asked my magic 8-ball what to expect, it said “All signs point to you’re an idiot for even asking that fucking question. Of course they won’t do shit. Moron.”


Since I’m not posting much, my new job is kicking my ass, I’ll leave you with a horrible pun (It was that or a mime. You’re welcome.)

I talk about math to groups of people, my left eye was blinded 33 years ago so it doesn’t track very well with the other one anymore, the blind one is wide open while the good one squints.

What that means is that if I’m talking to someone more than 5 feet away, he or she looks over her or his shoulder because they can’t tell where I’m looking.

It’s annoying to me and that person. It’s not anybody’s fault (except the guy who hit me with the ski pole), but it’s still very annoying.

So now I wear an eye patch.

Since I teach math, I figured I’d go with a bad pun.

i patch


I’m mostly hoping I don’t run into a mathematician who slaps me in the face for that.


Quoth George W Bush, (link added) ostensibly speaking about Putin (wink-wink, nudge-nudge) and totally not Obama, using NBC  (wholly owned subsidiary of Obama-God-President Inc.) was just a coincidence.

Putin’s domestic popularity comes from his control of Russian media, according to Bush. “Hell, I’d be popular, too, if I owned NBC news,” he said.




That article has a bunch of goodies, but that one made me laugh the most.

This one makes me cry the most

“In order to be an effective president … when you say something you have to mean it,”

Yeah, W knew that, the last two Dem POTUSes and W’s father did not and we have had nothing but trouble because of that.


Speaking of Tsar Putin, his Cossacks are initiating....recreating the route of the Soviet invasion of  Poland and Germany in WWII.


They are mixing their metaphors, they’re flying Soviet flags and carrying Stalin’s message but Putin is a Tsar. Confusing.

Germany and Poland remembering the last few times Russian Cossacks came storming through, are they’re not amused, they have both banned them but the Cossacks are still going to try.

What the Shit?

There’s a lot that’s predictable in a “What the Shit?” way and there’s a lot that’s that weird in the “What the Shit?” sort of way.

We’ve seen this State Dept “Advisor”  dude before telling the Copts to stop bleeding all over Egypt, here he is happy he doesn’t have to defend the Muslim Brotherhood anymore. Cuz now everybody realizes they’re great and shit.

What the Shit?

As Israel is bombing the shit out of Hamas,  you all what what Obama is going to say even as you say, “What the shit?” when he tells both sides to step back. You know, back to when Israel just let Hamas shoot rockets into Israel almost every single day some years but pretty constantly no matter what.

Israel is looking at the same thing our enemies are looking at and realizing they’re on their own and Obama is a weak, feckless tool who just wishes the world would leave him alone to eat his waffles.


Ukraine is done with being nice.

New battles raged in Ukraine’s east on July 1 as President Petro Poroshenko announced the end of a shaky 11-day ceasefire and said a new “active phase” of the government’s “anti-terrorist operation” would restart to quash pro-Russian separatists.

What the shit? Don’t you know you’re on your own? The President Feckless and the even more feckless EUnuchs aren’t going to help you. Unless the Germans are feeling like killing someone.

What the shit? I’m rooting for warlike Germans?!?!?!?!??

I don’t feel like looking to see what China’s doing today in the South China Sea, just assume they’re acting like murderous, commie dictators. Expansionist, murderous, commie dictators.

In more oligarchs trying to strengthen their hold news, let’s go the America!

Haley Barbour’s peeps were behind a bunch of the stuff calling tea partiers racist in Mississippi.

No word on those fliers, but it’s bound to come out. I wonder, when it’s discovered that a Republican did them, will whoever tells Cochran what to say tell him to step down?

Sorry, I should have put a drink warning in there or at least a “What the shit?” warning.

We’re just finding out there was some good old fashioned politicking going on there too.

A black reverend stiffed by the Cochran campaign has exposed an alleged criminal conspiracy by Cochran staffers to commit massive voter fraud …

says he delivered “hundreds or even thousands,” of blacks to the polls … “They [the Cochran campaign] told me to offer blacks fifteen dollars each and to vote for Thad.”


What the shit? The GOP is paying Democrats to vote for their guy? All they do is call me names and ask me for money.

The GOP establishment pricks there are also making it so McDaniel’s peeps cannot look at the votes to see who voted in both primaries so they’re having to sue to get access.

The lawsuit asks the court to grant immediate access to voting records to inspect for possible illegal voting. It asserts that “defendants failed to properly abide by federal election record maintenance and open records provisions codified in the National Voter Registration Act of 1993 (NVRA). Records made partially available to the plaintiffs indicated ‘double-voting’ from Democratic to Republican primaries – potentially diluting votes in violation of the Equal Protection Clause.”


What the shit? Is everybody going all Chicago-Machine politics on us or was always this prevalent but I just didn’t notice?  How come nobody told me? I mean, I knew it was in the big, Dem-Machine cities where I’ve lived, but I didn’t think it was everywhere.

Speaking of Chicago-Machine politics and people getting upset, this is a serious What the Shit? deal,

A bunch of people blocked buses of illegals on their way to being “processed” and released.

More than 100 people waving American flags and holding signs that opposed “new illegals” waited in the hot sun for the three charter buses to arrive at the U.S. Customs and Border Protection station in Murrieta, about an hour north of San Diego.


Stuff is really pissing people off.Telling America they suck as you break all the laws is pissing off Teh Peepul as they haven’t been pissed off before. in a long time. (that’s what I mean to say)


So CERN found the GOD-PARTICLE!!!!!!! (Higgs Boson) and now they’re all upset because nobody cares enough to give them money.

Because after finding it in July 2012 — and confirming it six months later, after almost 50 years of searching — what else is left? The anti-climax was inevitable.

Sure enough, the world is far less interested in this project, and much less money is being invested in it.


What the shit? You called it the God Particle and told us it was going to CHANGE EVERYTHING!!!!!!! and it’s changed….. dialogue on the Big Bang Theory.

You oversold and now you’re paying the price. Eh, should have gone into global warmmongering.


A few years ago I was sorta following a story in the NY Post about a CANNIBAL!!!!!, he was convicted and I noted,

Okay, now I feel kind of stupid, apparently the “Cannibal” of the NY Post didn’t actually eat anybody, he just read websites about it and talked about it. I’m not defending any of that, but he didn’t actually do anything but talk shit on the intertubes.

And now we see

. Well, a judge has decided he was just kidding. So he overturned his conviction.

What the shit? You really convicted a dude for playing stuff on the intertubes? That article is kind of OUTraged that the guy was let off, but he didn’t do anything. Jebus.


A couple chucklers,

News From The 1980s!

Transformers 4, A Chinese Menu Of Product Placement


I don’t know, that just made me laugh. I mean, What the shit?  Are you upset it’s no longer Japanese stuff or are you surprised/OUTRAGED!!!! that Transformers went all commercial?


In Italy they’re going all CSI on Ernest and Julio.

It’s a genetic test, but no body parts or blood are being analyzed — it’s bottles of wine instead.

That’s not really a What the shit?, they have their priorities straight.


I didn’t realize I had that many links open. What the shit? that was a long post.