Archive for the ‘Kittehs!’ Category

in a real death waltz between what’s flesh and what’s fantasy. (spoiler alert: fantasy is ahead on points)

Time to take our stand, our fine betters are busily making sure we live in jungleland.

An internal FBI investigation into the spike of attacks on law enforcement has determined that revenge, inspired by the Black Lives Matter movement, the media’s assault on police shootings, and criticism from politicians, is the what motivates a “majority” of those targeting cops.

“Law enforcement officials believe that defiance and hostility displayed by assailants toward law enforcement appears to be the new norm,”

We’ve been watching millennia of progress wiped out in education and now in civil society we’re basically at the “Attack The Other!!!!” phase in evolution.

Filling in the for the neanderthals is……us!

Detailing when fantasy conflicts with flesh in two graphics and a reminder.

We all saw in Berkeley what happens when fantasy meets reality.

That flag should read, “We Will Be Trod!”

 

 

GOP voters device

Crap. I got out my squeezy bulb and I didn’t even need it!?!?

Susan Rice has denied a request to testify in front a Senate judiciary subcommittee next week on Russian interference in the U.S. presidential election.

Oh, she declined the honor? Obviously there’s nothing Congress can do now! I mean, if she says she’s not gonna testify their hands are tied!

 

I absolutely do not understand why the puppy blender doesn’t seem to agree with this sentiment.

What with the blatant fake-newsing and pathetic lies, they’re doing as much to ensure Trump is re-elected as they ever did for Obama.

 

Via Say Uncle we see the St. Louis Post-Dispatch is Dedicated To Diversity!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stacy Washington’s column will no longer appear in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch. Her active promotional activities and professional association with the National Rifle Association represented an unacceptable conflict of interest

Well, not so much diversity as uniformity of thought.

Sorry for any confusion due to thinking that the state of journalism is anything but “Screw You America.”

Read the comments, they’re funny.

Interesting! I was informed of Stacy’s NRA membership last year, WHEN THE POST- DISPATCH INTRODUCED STACY! Guess that slipped by you, huh?

Way to increase your readership

 

That’s not their priority. If you think of it as “tithing”, things make much more sense.

 

Trump Is Doing Away With The Obama Brand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There’s so much funny with that article.

First, they say it like it’s a bad thing.

But the apparent retiring of the title associated with the Obama era is still seen by some as an attempt to eradicate anything linked to the previous administration.

We wish.

Second, this

Some outside observers argue that Trump could be trying to shore up his own support by taking a scythe to Obama-era policies and programs.

Yeah, see…that’s why he was elected so instead of “shore up his own support” you minitrue assholes could have written, “keep his campaign promises” but then the Hill would have to acknowledge reality.

Third,

Jen Psaki, Obama’s former communications director, said it was “surprising and politically stupid

 

And she’s an expert on surprisingly stupid! The one person in the Obama admin who could make Marie Harf look semi-intelligent.

Fourth

The new president’s now-infamous tweets making the unsupported allegation that Obama wiretapped Trump Tower

Still fucking that “unsupported” chicken.

Fifth

While Trump defenders argue that there is nothing unusual about a new president of one party moving in a sharply different direction from his predecessor, voices within the Obama camp characterize the Trump approach as petty,

No really. They quoted Obama people as calling someone, anyone, ‘petty’. He of the “barrycades”, the casual, ‘scratching my nose with my middle finger’ childishness,

They let Obama’s peeps call someone, anyone, “petty”. Obama and his entire admin should be barred from calling anybody ‘petty’. Even Richard Petty.

Sixth, and this one’s on Trump (or Tillerson I guess)

…State Department spokeswoman Heather Nauert…

Heather Nauert? Doesn’t she have some J-school projects to do so she can pretend she’s a journalist?

Did someone make a rule that State spokespersons are supposed to 30 year old cute nitwits?

Seventh!

Attacking Obama keeps people’s focus away from the first 100 days of non-accomplishment.”

Other chicken minitrue is fucking. “Trump hasn’t done anything in his first 100 days!!!!! Except try to undo Obama’s Legacy!!!! which has nothing to do with why he was elected so even though we’re whining about him undoing Obama’s Legacy that doesn’t mean he’s accomplished anything!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

I’m sure I’ve missed some funny, but I’m ODing on schadenfreude.

 

Coupla Dave Barry links.

 

Oh man, that ain’t right.

We’re sorry to spread the news to Skippy fans: the peanut butter — both the crunchy and smooth version — is no longer available in Canada.

If only I were allowed in Canada, I can see a decent opportunity there. This makes me laugh, I wonder if it’s true.

We’re a vast country with only 36 million people. The distribution costs are really high,” Charlebois said, adding that the extra cost of required French labelling may have also been a deterrent.(emphasis me V)

Funintended consequences always bite you in the nut(s).

 

A bet: As the gov’t is doing this, Canadians are scouring their country for these

Liquor authorities across Canada are recalling a brand of gin that may contain almost twice as much alcohol as claimed on the bottle.

Does it make you go blind? No? There’s not too much alcohol in it.

That’s how you tell.

 

The world is sorely lacking in people who say, “You know. Maybe that isn’t such a good idea.”

WTF? While I applaud that they accept that girls are where cooties come from, they seem to take it too far.

 

Mae govannen vanima!

Wanna see my flet?

 

I’m a little disappointed, nobody made fun of my “ohm i” pun.

Listen, how am I going to keep consistently hitting the lowest rung of the humor ladder if I don’t get encouragement?

Oh…..

Bastids!

Funny Stuff

Posted: June 18, 2015 by veeshir in Funniest End of Civilization Evah, Kittehs!, PEBKAC

It always makes me laugh how often when nitwits link to articles they seem to think backs up their claims the links do exactly the opposite. ‘

Case in point.

So writes Zoë Coombs Marr, a writer, comedian and “theatre maker,” and a woman of profound humility, in a piece complaining about the “devastating effects” of modest alterations in taxpayer subsidy for Australia’s commercially unviable artist

So who does she link?

At this point, rather bafflingly, Ms Marr links to an article – this one here, by Tim Blair – which is part of a series of pieces by Blair and Andrew Bolt on arts funding cronyism and the ludicrous misspending of public money. A series that actually reveals her claim of funding integrity and aesthetic high-mindedness as – how shall I put this? – less than convincing. Not your mates, indeed. (links in original V)

Heh. When a lefty links Tim Blair to back up her assertions, hilarity is sure to follow.

Love this quote

(David Thompson V) Undaunted, or perhaps oblivious, our unhappy artist continues,

Grant money is pumped back into the economy and employs numerous people.

Yeah, taking money from producers to give to ‘artists’ who need to be paid for their socially relevant ‘art’ pumps all manner of money into the local economy and employs the employees at liquor and pot distributors, which is something I suppose.

Since I’m going camping this weekend, then on to DC for the week and then back to AZ, this post will probably be here for a long time so I figure I’ll leave something visually teh funny up here.

Via Big Fur Hat (who obviously doesn’t own the world or else his server folks wouldn’t have boned him last week).

transcat

Important, pre-camping Update!!!!!!!!

transdog

Well, not that important, but still an update!!!

Via Are We Lumberjacks

Teach a man Veeshing and he’ll be hilariously OUTRAGED! for ever.

First we’ll do some hilarity.

Terrorists have a new Facebook page. Seriously? What do they do? Suicide bomb Farmville?

Even funnier, terrorists have hacked the BBC’s weather twitter account. Al Gore hardest hit.

Now some endy that ain’t funny at all.

Lebanon is fucked. Sunni V Shiite in Tripolis is getting out of hand.

Deadly clashes erupted once again in Lebanon’s troubled northern city of Tripoli after simmering sectarian tensions boiled over into a melee of violence that has seen snipers fatally shoot people amid explosions and heavy gunfire.

Truck bombs on the way. Poor bastids.

A little hope in Egypt, Egyptians getting sick of Islamist assholes.

n two notable incidents in the northern province of Alexandria and the province of Suez, citizens beat bearded men who tried to impose their presence on the streets in order to preserve security. When the men tried to yell at women for what they saw as indecent clothing and threatened them with punishment if they ever wore those clothes again, the women yelled back at them and started hitting them with their shoes before passersby rallied, caught some of bearded men and beat the ones who were too slow to escape.

I’d be more on their side if they weren’t fine with it when the jihadis were killing Copts, but now that they’re going after eveybody else, well, that’s beyond the pale.

The Muslim Brotherhood is having problems in Cairo too.

Several thousand opponents of Egypt’s Muslim Brotherhood clashed with supporters of the Islamist group near its headquarters in Cairo on Friday

I’m rooting for them, take your revolution back before you live in some Islamist shithole where not having a beard and listening to music is verboten.

 

Speaking of poor bastids, ethnic problems in Burma.

Myanmar has declared martial law in four central towns following unrest between Buddhists and Muslims that has left at least 20 people dead.

Agitated crowds of Buddhists were still roaming the streets and several neighbourhoods were still on fire or smouldering after hundreds of Muslims were forced to flee for their lives.

 

How pissed off do you have to make Buddhists to get them be all violent?

Not sure if this is good or bad, but it’s change.

The people of Turkey are digesting the historic statement from jailed rebel leader Abdullah Ocalan, who called for a PKK ceasefire on March 21….

“From now on the principles of the Turkish state could be different. It’s a process of creating a new constitution.

Maybe even some hope. I’m rooting for them, the Kurds just keep getting fucked.

Another case of exporting our values.

Most Ukrainians see their parliament representatives only once in four years — during the election campaign. But soon after getting elected, many deputies forget about accountability.

Just like ours!

My posts have been all disjointed so I’m trying for structure, this case of an unintentionally accurate headline is where we seg our ue to America.

Obama cements his symbolic support of Israel

Symbolic is absolutely correct, cuz he doesn’t support them in any other way.

This is one of those “Needs a different headline” stories.

US plan calls for more scanning of private Web traffic, email

Alternate headline: “Veeshir to put Fuck You DHS, NSA, FBI, CIA in the subject line of every email”

In more, “We’re fucking assholes” news, Via Weasel Zippers, we see some GOPers going for headlines and Democrats refusing to even symbolically say they’re against crushing America.

It would have sent the budget back to the Budget Committee until Saturday with instructions to make it balance by 2023.

They’re refusing to say they’ll balance the budget in 13 years. First, anything but this year is calling me an idiot as future Congresses will not be bound by this stupidity, second, seriously? Democrats don’t feel the need to even pretend they give a shit about fiscal sanity?

I mean, we’re going to be utterly fucked by 2023 so the budget will either be balanced by reality or we’ll all be serfs living in a EUnuchstania-like  EUtopia so this utterly symbolic thing was stupid from the get-go, but at least pretend to care.

In, We’re Running Out Of Money news, Paramus, NJ (shopping haven) is fining folks for leaving their lights on after dark.

-Businesses in Paramus, New Jersey are getting tickets when they leave their sign lights on….

“We’ve been her for 25 years and never had an issue,” Billard says.

They’re broke, tread carefully as they become creative about getting blood from your stones.

So the GOP has been trying to figure out what to do to be more palatable as a choice, so they’ve decided that the most important GOP presidential candidate to be like is…. Mike Fucking Huckabee!

Priebus cited former governor Mike Huckabee of Arkansas as an example of someone who could be “a model for a lot of people in our party”

Seriously? If you were saying that to say, “Get the fuck out of politics and get a job as blow-dried telemprompter reader” I’d respect it, but he’s not. He thinks the candidate that was worse than both McCain and Romney is their fucking model.

So, still pissed off at me for saying Fuck the GOP I’m voting 3rd party instead of throwing my vote away?

Cold Fury just keeps harshing my mellow, and my mellow isn’t very yellow as it is. At least this one has some seriously hilarity.

Florida professor and high-ranking member of the Palm Beach County Democratic Party recently instructed his students to take out a piece of paper, write “JESUS” on it, then put it on the floor and stomp on it – and the Mormon student who refused to do so, calling the assignment morally offensive – was suspended….

In an emailed statement the university sent to CBS, campus officials stated “faculty and students at academic institutions pursue knowledge and engage in open discourse. While at times the topics discussed may be sensitive, a university environment is a venue for such dialogue and debate.”

Dialogue does not seem to mean what they think it does. Kid tried to introduce another viewpoint and they suspended him as they proudly talked about dialogue. That’s fucking funny. You know, so long as you’re not the kid who’s paying $thousands a year to go there.

 

In my life eggs have been good for you and bad for you, alternatingly, too many times to count. Ditto bacon, vino and sharp sticks in the eye… way, check that last one.

So has salt. I have an alternate take on this one though.

One in 10 Americans dies from eating too much salt, the researchers found.

Salt, necessary for human life is bad for you! If that were true, then NJ would be depopulated. Seriously, I’ve never met any people who put more salt on everything.

Some illustrations.

A little early for Caturday, but I might be busy tomorrow so I’m posting it today.

Via Tim Blair’s cat post we see this bit of evil hilarity.

 

catrug

Although, it just doesn’t seem as impressive as a bear skin rug. How can you brag about how it was about to bit your toes when you took it.

 

This is genius, I’m going to have to get one to go with my Gadsden Flags.

times_up_flag_z

 

You know, cuz time’s pretty darn close to up.

Have fun everybody and don’t forget, if you’re not hilariously OUTRAGED!!!! you’re just not Veeshing.

 

 

Mann Down!

Posted: October 31, 2012 by veeshir in Green Goofs, HAHAHAHAHAA!!!!, Kittehs!

Okay, that’s hilarious.

For those not in the know, Michael Mann, global warmmongering bullshit artist and maker-upper of the “hockey-stick” school of global warmmongering bullshit, claims he won a Nobel Prize. Turns out, he didn’t realize people can use the Intertubes to check stuff like that. He didn’t win a prize. Penn State put out some bullshit about how proud they are of the way Michael Mann is ‘associated’ or something with some people who won a Nobel.

So National Review decided to get funny.

There aren’t enough “ha”s for my “bwa” on that one.

As Ed Driscoll at the Puppy Blender’s said, “That’s gonna leave a mark”.

It almost makes me feel sorry for Penn State, they’re having a bad decade, but considering why they’re having a bad decade, fuck em.  I’ll just point and laugh as they go from a great school to a punch line (in both senses of the word “Punch”, IMO).

As an aside, this deserves a link.

I steal from…link to Are We Lumberjacks once in a while, he cracks me up. In this case, it’s not a link but an idea. This sounds so Lemur King that I actually had to check the link to make sure it was AWL.

He talks about what to do when a storm is coming, and I fully intend to do this if I ever live in a neighborhood again.

Wrapped the mail box in tinfoil; which will do no good, but it’s fun to do to see if your neighbors will assume it’s important and follow suit. (it takes a few storms for them to get the idea but once the first neighbor gets on board the whole thing snowballs – pretty soon the neighbor wives are hectoring the hubbies, “come on, there’s a storm coming and you haven’t even wrapped the mailbox yet.”)

Okay, that’s funny.

Eh, the blog hasn’t had any kitteh pics in a long time. A couple below the fold. I edited this a little to get rid of some mistakes.

(more…)

Hahahahaha! Fuck you, hipster douchebags. Fuck your attempts to refuck that which was unfucked by the Supreme Court’s Floccosely Fucksmack For Freedom’s Sake. Fuck your arrogance so hard, Chuck Negron’s replacement cock will explode from the shock. Fuck you and your hebetic mindset for thinking that celebritydom and a cute publicity stunt would trump the Constitution and the laws the rest of us are forced to follow and allow you to skip the line when it comes to the First Amendment. And fuck you simply because I love seeing people who think they are so fucking smart fail so immensely at satirizing a decision with which they disagree.

Games for Kittehs

Posted: May 19, 2011 by socklessjoe in Kittehs!, Random Crap, Win!

For iPad and Android: GamesForCats.com

Fuck you. Hortleifuck you as if you were a hollowed out nerf football used by a confused teenager coming of age. Fuck you for sitting on that couch with Pelosi. Fuck you for your arrogance. Fuck you for your stupidity. Fuck you for criticizing someone who has a plan that doesn’t involve skittles and rainbowed goatse while you sat around cheating on your wives. And fuck you because you seem determined to fuck everything up.