Archive for the ‘Soccer – sport of men’ Category

Repent Your Sins! The End Is Nigh!

Posted: November 10, 2013 by veeshir in Soccer - sport of men

ABBA mulls possible reunion.

Every Wednesday needs a pantsing

Posted: September 25, 2013 by aliceaitch in Soccer - sport of men

A place for me to hide. All I’m finding are places to hide from what with the wars and the murdering and the GLAVIN.


The Falklands is voting on a referendum on war between Britain and Argentina, I think.

Residents of the Falkland Islands vote on Sunday in a sovereignty referendum aimed at countering Argentina’s increasingly assertive claim over the British-ruled territory.

How else would you read that? Add in this,

The government’s mishandling of Argentina’s economy has hit new highs recently with the implementation of price controls on food. It is a notoriously ineffective policy that tends to create shortages and spawns black markets.

You know Argentina is going to need an external enemy really soon and the Jews are too remote so the Brits it is.I know war isn’t funny, except when it is.

Think about it, there’s a very good chance we’ll have the first war in history where the two combatants cannot actually meet each other on a battlefield.

The Royal Navy isn’t what it used to be and what’s a starving, broke Argentinian military going to do? Knowing that Obama likes to fight both sides of a war, we could see America ferrying everybody to somewhere, maybe the Pampas would be good?, so they can have their war.

But maybe Argentina will think outside the box.

Venezuela is going to have an election next month between a guy who’d like to live in a free country and a guy who also wants to be free….to do whatever the fuck he wants. He is Chavez’ chosen successor.

So both Venezuela and Argentina are going to need an enemy, how about A Short War?  This way, they’ll speak the same language.

How funny would it be if WWIII started in South America when the last two were mostly not fought anywhere near there? Well, except for a couple of sea battles.

The Egyptians are still rioting over the soccer hooligans, I didn’t realize Port Said was on the Suez Canal. It’s a good thing nothing important goes through that canal or there might be some problems from Obama’s foreign policy.

So fucking Karzai is blaming the US and the Taliban for not making nicey-nicey. Can we leave him to get killed yet?

Azerbaijan is interesting, they’re playing nicey with Jews and Iran is messing with them. How funny would it be if the Jews helped muslims fight against the Mad Mullahs? That would bring in Russia. So Obama could fight both sides of that war, by helping Israel and Iran. Seriously, if WWIII breaks out before 2017, we’ll be fighting on both sides. That’ll be funny. You know, until we nuke ourselves to teach us a lesson.

Actually, that’ll still be funny. Just not funny-funny.

A few days ago I wrote about some UN Peacekeepers who were taken hostage in Syria, I figured they were dead as the UN is feckless. I was right and wrong, so I have to admit this makes me laugh. And it’s a good laugh.

They were freed

Twenty-one United Nations peacekeepers were welcomed in Jordan when they were freed after being held by rebels for three days in Southern Syria.

But the UN was feckless.

as a request to the Red Cross and the United Nations to accept the hostages was turned down. It’s believed neither organisation recognises the Martyrs of Yarmouk group of fighters.

How fucking funny is that? They were freed due to the kindness of jihadis even as the UN said, “No thanks.”

I guess the jihadis were busy killing Syrian gov’t types.

Syrian rebels staged a surprise dawn attack on Sunday against the key district of Baba Amr in the central city of Homs, a year after regime forces retook it after a deadly month-long siege.

The new battle for Baba Amr began as jihadist fighters in the oil-producing east said they had established religious committees to administer the area’s policing, judiciary and emergency services.

Good. When Jihadi fights jihadi supporters Veeshir smiles. Knowing Israel, you know they’re supplying intelligence to both sides. It’s like the dog convincing wolves that coyotes taste better than sheep.

This is when I normaly seg my ue from furriners to the US, but I don’t have a story for that. So I’ll link this bit of funny that’s not at all funny.

It’s a story about how the hometowns of Hitler and Stalin are facing their legacies.

The Austrian town (could someone ask Obama how to say “Hitler” in Austrian?) where Hitler was born is trying to forget it, they rent out the house to keep it from becoming a neo-nazi shrine. This is a nice touch,

Until 2011, the house was used as a day-care centre for disabled people.


But in Georgia, they’re are taking a different tack.

For years, the main boulevard, Stalin Street, was dominated by a huge statue of Stalin.

But in 2010, it was taken down by the pro-Western government of Mikhail Saakashvili, much to the dismay of many in Gori.

But thats’ not the end of the story.

A few weeks ago, Gori city council, now run by Georgian Dream, allocated funds to re-erect the statue.

It will not be returned to Stalin Street, but will be put in Gori’s main tourist attraction, the Stalin museum, which is still a shrine to the dictator and scarcely touched since it was built in 1957.


After being invaded by Russia they’re making nicey with Russia, funny how that worked out.

One more overseas deal, this guy has a long, thoughtful post on the next pope. If you’re a Catholic, it’s a good read.

Actually, I do have a segway, from Mordor to America!Via the Jawas, we see this.

It’s up and down, but when they said, “Brokeback Mt Doom”, I LOLed I did. And I don’t LOL very often.

Let’s go to Fuck You America!, the best part? It’s people who speak English so we don’t have to rely on imperfect translations.

Nannarch Bloomberg‘s comments about shelters made me laugh. No, not the bit about people flying their private jets in and taking a limo to the homeless shelters because he signed a law saying a anybody can get a bed. Law, meet unintended consequences.

Mayor Bloomberg yesterday put his foot in his mouth by suggesting homeless shelters are bursting at the seams because anyone can get a bed — even the filthy rich.


I bet a dollar it’s not the filthy rich, I bet it’s the children of the filthy rich. The Occutards.

A little bit of America saying fuck you back.  The NYS boycott is up to 119. Yay!

This looks like a fuck you from America, but… The Puppy Blender asks

Democrats lost the Congress over gun control in 1994. Are they dumb enough to repeat their mistake?

You know McCain, Graham and the usual assholes will be more than happy to give those Dems some bi-partisany cover.

Moar “Hey America, I won’t be happy until you suck” news, we see this

Among the tactics apparently used by at least part of the Obama administration is to make the public as annoyed with the results of the sequester cuts as possible, if a leaked e-mail message from the Department of Agriculture is to be believed. Animal and Plant Health Inspection Service official Charles Brown told his department’s employees, in an internal e-mail obtained by the Washington Times, that “We have gone on record with a notification to Congress and whoever else that ‘APHIS would eliminate assistance to producers in 24 states in managing wildlife damage to the aquaculture industry, unless they provide funding to cover the costs.’ So it is our opinion that however you manage that reduction, you need to make sure you are not contradicting what we said the impact would be.”


Make it hurt until he gets what he wants. We have a president who wants to hurt the productive class to make them want to give more to the non-productive class. That sucks.

Everybody is missing the real headline on this one from Feinstein (dumb as a box of Boxers!)

And yet it’s legal to hunt humans with 15-round, 30-round, even 150-round magazines.

She’s saying people should have a sporting chance! It should be legal to hunt humans only with low-capacity mags!

And you people thought I was too paranoid worrying about the Cox Skybombers.

In, I Expected Better From You news, Neil Boortz is acting surprised Obama is ignoring his petition. Jeez, it was blatantly obvious from day one this was a sign of contempt from Obama, “Here, this’ll make the rubes happy”.

I have to wonder if this is why we haven’t seen Moronpundit in so long.

We’ve featured some unusual fashions here over the years, but I’m not sure whether I should be drooling or nauseous from this insane creation – the bacon dress.

I can hear the cop saying, “So the man ripped your dress off and ran away cackling?” and then the local SWAT team surrounds MPs house and he won’t come out until he’s done eating.




Sonamabatch, I did that post yesterday and I just can’t get my Teh Funny back.

Let’s see if the FEOCE! can cheer me up.

Okay, now normally I would think is funny, but today I just cry for the youth.  I don’t know anything about that site except they’re insane.

Four years later, as President Obama starts his second term as president, the country needs not just a mention of the need for more college graduates but also a comprehensive strategy for producing those college graduates — the kind of strategy that the administration has designed and executed for the education that comes before college.

Wait, what? You mean taking tasty food away from them? Because other than that and shooting down vouchers for poor blacks in DC, the only thing he’s done in lower education is make the special ed class feel like fucking geniuses.

Damn, that should have been fucking hilarious, I mean, that moh-ron thinks Obama gives shit one about anything but power for the gov’t and was actually happy about his SOTU, but yesterday just destroyed me for a day or so.

SMOD’s dry run went well, don’t you think?

meteorite plunged to earth in Russia’s Ural Mountains Friday, exploding into flames in a powerful blast that smashed windows and injured around 1,000 people.

Dam, even that can’t cheer me up.

Crap, more Islamists copying our God-President and firing generals before his putsch. Man that just sucks.

So why link it? Because I’m pissed off at Minitrue and these idjits piss me off.

his is yet another calculated maneuver by Turkey’s Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan to ensure that the Turkish armed forces are never again able to illegally take over the government

Illegally? No, that’s their job whenever the jihadi assholes try to take over Turkey. So actually what Erdogan is doing is probably illegal as he wants Islamist assholes to take over and KILL US ALL!!!!!

Shit, people trying to KILL US ALL!!!, usually makes me laugh. This just sucks.

More on that “debate” we’re having over guns.

So in Minnesota they wanted to have a “conversation” on guns, so they called in some gun experts to discuss that assault weapon that’s terrorized so many soda cans, the Ruger 10/22.

n the video, DFL legislators simply arise and exit without explanation. They avoid learning details from the presentation about the very firearms they seek to legislate out of existence.

They don’t want a “conversation”, fuck people, doesn’t anybody pay any fucking attention?

No politicians want a “conversation” or “debate” on guns, most want to take them away from us and Rand Paul doesn’t. The only “debate’ is how much those assholes think they can get away with.

Dammit, still can’t find the funny.

This is Ta Nehisi Coates (wow, I’ve been seeing that name for years, I thought it was an Egyptian god) struggling with how people can lionize that murderous asshole out west.

Because he believed the right things about the right people. Geez, it’s not rocket science or brain surgery.

Dammit, I just keep blowing jokes. This is pissing me off. Is it 5 O’clock somewhere?

The Firearm Blog is freaking out because Amazon is going to stop selling something. They’re not sure what, but it’s related to guns so SOMETHING MUST BE DONE!!!

I checked Amazon’s page, unless they’ve changed something and are trying to keep it quiet, it hasn’t changed. 48 hour rule folks.

More bullshit ‘science‘.

Recent research suggests that warm weather impairs our ability to make complex decisions

So how do you explain global warmmongering Mr Smarty Pants?  Huh?

As it’s gotten cooler, they’ve gotten stupider and more vocally idiotic. Geez, doesn’t anybody do science anymore?

Now a few mea dumbas.

Last week I mentioned that Chicago city pols are idiots, like Barbara Boxer or Maxine Waters only stupider. I could have just written, “They are basically just Sheila Jackson Lee

I stand here as a freed slave because this Congress came together.

My only question is: How many people on her staff are there merely to remind her to breathe?
I wish I was laughing at stuff today, because I would point and saying something about her being re-elected and doing drugs with Cynthia McKinney, but I just can’t work up the laughs.
Another mea dumba, I wrote about Battleship and was pissed they didn’t use the joke about a Japanese guy captaining the Missouri to bomb Pearl, but I missed the joke about the buoys. It wasn’t until probably the third time I saw that scene and realized, “They’re playing Battleship!”
I felt pretty darn stupid.
Last mea dumba while I’m doing it, I like movies with the Rock. Not so bad, but here goes the bad part. I like his Mysterious Island movie, I’ve watched it while messing with the computer so if I’m doing something I don’t change the channel right away, at the end of that movie he sings “What a wonderful world” with a band and he really, really, really gets into, he even encourages the band to rock out.
I enjoy it. Seriously, I found myself singing along the other day.
So sad.
Oh well, SMOD will be here later today so we have that going for us.
I fucking hate computers, I’ve tried to fix the last few paragraphs with extra line breaks to spread it out and make it easier to read but it won’t fucking work.
Sonomabatch, does anybody know if there’s a way to get to the Internet without computers?

Your tax dollars at work

Posted: August 2, 2012 by aliceaitch in Soccer - sport of men

The least Government Motors could have done is chosen an Amurrican team to sponsor.

Under the seven-year deal, which makes Chevrolet the [Manchester United] jersey sponsor starting in the 2014-2015 season, GM will pay $60 million to $70 million a year — at least double the current fee paid by insurance broker Aon, said a person with knowledge of the contract who asked not to be identified. GM also will pay the club a $100 million activation fee, the person said.

I wonder what current odds are that GM will survive to 2020?  Is there a stipulation in the contract that if GM goes under that the sponsorship can be removed from the jersey?

Oh, and fuck Man U.  Just because they’re Man U.

This really annoys me, making fun of this tool just feels too cruel.

It doesn’t mean I’m not going to do it, it just means I feel that I should feel bad about it. He obviously chose the wrong football.

So Tony Romo had a bachelor party and didn’t want to drink. So what’s a man to do?

Don’t ask Tony, he played hide and seek in the woods.

’ We tried coming up with a game, but with 14 or 15 guys, there aren’t a lot of non-drinking games at that age you can do.”

Oh I don’t know, how about paintball? Shooting? Horseback riding? Water-skiing? Jet-skiing? Driving 4-wheelers in the desert? You’re in freaking Texas. Act like it.

Somehow I have a feeling I’m not the only one who thinks he’s a tool.

“I stayed hidden for a while,” he said. “I had a pretty good spot. It was probably about 35 minutes.

Yeah, I bet. I can see how the game went.

First guy,“Do you think we should “find” Tony yet or wait?

Second guy, “Nah, let’s finish our beers.

Dammit, I didn’t like Aikman or Danny White, but I respected them, I almost liked Staubach and I really respected him.

I can’t even call him Tony Homo anymore, I want to make fun of him not homosexuals.

You can’t see me

That pop you’re hearing?

Posted: April 23, 2011 by aliceaitch in Kittehs!, Soccer - sport of men