I haven’t been tubing for a while so when I did my rounds I found lots of stuff I didn’t know about.

Most of it not very funny but some of it terrifyingly  hilarious.

Let’s start with ISIS, it’s never funny and people get beheaded. First, an aside. Isis has been torturing, raping, beheading, hanging, crucifying and enslaving for a couple years now and they cut the heads off 3 journalists and now it’s WAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Our media has its priorities, 1,000 people get killed and it’s just wogs fighting wogs, not our business. Let a journalist, an important person, get killed and that makes it personal.

So Isis is recruiting openly in our NATO ally Turkey.

Our supporters can freely hang out in Istanbul streets, recruit poor people from suburbs & police will only help

Yay!!!! That would be just endy except we’d be allies with ISIS in Turkey and Syria as we bomb in Iraq. That’s pretty darn funny.

This one is sort of funny, surprising and a little depressing. Lebanon will not join our semi-kinetic action against ISIS.

“US and its allies created and trained these takfiri movements. We have stated that Lebanon cannot be a part of an alliance led by the US,” (Lebanese State Minister V)Fneish…

You realize what that means?

Since Hezbollah is a big part of the Lebanese gov’t, we will not be conducting airstrikes in support of Hezbollah attacks. So the opposite of funny as that would be endily hilarious. Eh too bad, there’s always Iran I guess.

In Sietch Terror news,

International airlines have suspended flights to Yemen’s capital as fighting…

Yemeni television’s three channels stopped transmitting on Friday…

 

the Jihadi V Jihadi war in that particular bucket of scorpions  is cruising right along.

I feel sorry for the people there who are not in favor of their jihadis and just want to live and let live.

Those two idiots should just leave Yemen.

A drudgetaposition

Putin Privately Threatens to Invade Poland, Romania and the Baltic States.

Ukraine Launches Joint Military Brigade With Poland and Lithuania.

 

Now, the seque from overseas to the US,

The family of Glen Doherty, the former Navy SEAL killed in the 2012 Benghazi terror attack, has filed a $2 million claim against the CIA and the State Department.

 

I hope this goes through and actually gets some coverage from the assholes in Minitrue who are ignoring the feckless criminality of the Obama admin in the Benghazi deal.

 

Hmmm, I guess some people miss the rioting.

Mail Online reports that protesters made their plans known at the September 16th St. Louis City Council meeting. They “promised to disrupt grocery stores” and warned that if St. Louis Cardinals make it to the World Series, they will disrupt that too.

The protesters grew louder as the council meeting went on, demanding not only the arrest of Wilson but also “the resignations of both County Police Chief John Belmar and Ferguson Police Chief Thomas Jackson.” They also demanded that County Prosecutor Robert McCullock be removed from the case.

CBS St. Louis reports that the protesters are also trying to get St. Louis Rams ticket holders to donate tickets so protesters can “get in the dome” and shut the game down.

 

If this gets out of hand again, I could see it spreading to other cities, then the illegal immigrants get involved and then……. well, that’s when things get freaking ugly.

I fgure when the inner cities start rioting the police will grab their M-4s and grenade launchers,  jump in their MRAPs and go round tea partiers before they decide to riot too.

This is pretty funny, Karl Rove whining that the GOP isn’t getting as much in donations as they deserve.  I’d say Breitbart gets it right in the headline.

AFTER DECLARING WAR ON TEA PARTY, KARL ROVE FRETS GOP ESTAB CANDIDATES NOT GETTING ENOUGH DONATIONS

 

Funny how that works out, you shit on your base, call them names and they stop sending you money. Huh. Perplexing.

I understand Bob Beckel is not a journalist, but I bet he would claim he is so that’s what makes this funny.

“I’ll tell you: I would expect an October surprise,” Beckel said on Thursday. “I think I know what is — I’m not going to say it,

Journalists are not in the business of imparting information anymore. That’s pretty funny in an end of civilization way.

The most egregious example was how the media knew all about the OUTING OF SUPER-SECRET AGENT Jarret, they knew she was in the CIA before she was “outed” and they knew who “leaked” the well-known fact and yet, they pretended they didn’t for more than a year in order to be able to viciously attack their chosen party’s political enemy.

Via Say Uncle, a scourge on our nation, the no-knock raid.

Some Police Operators who wanted to Operate Tactically had a tactical operations order (search warrant) so one climbed in the window and then the rest busted down the door. So the homeowner defended himself, killing the window-invader and shooting other cops and now he’s on death row.

So why the raid? For “bags of cocaine” from some source. What did they find?

Though they found a glass pipe, a grinder, and a pistol, they did not find any drugs.

 

So he was a small time drug user who was out of whatever he smoked.

No knock raids should be outlawed in every case except where the police explicitly state on the search warrant that the perpetrator is ‘better off dead”.

via KaChing!, this is funny cuz it’s true.

safety first

 

I’m sure this will reassure any prospective allies thinking of joining us in our semi-kinetic actions against ISIS.

Kerry being interrogated by Marco Rubio

Kerry: But I think that we are so far away from that “being the only way” and being a hypothetical.

Rubio: Well let me ask you this-

Kerry: No, let me just finish the question. I’m not going to get into hypotheticals but you’re presuming Iran and Syria don’t have any capacity to take on ISIL, I mean who knows. I don’t know what’s going to happen here. Let’s start down this road-

Rubio: Let me ask you about that then. What you’re saying now is there is the potential for the US will be coordinating with Iran?

Kerry: No I never said anything about coordinating. If we are failing and failing miserably who knows what choice they might make.

Jebus.

He just said we’re the B Team and we have the A Team, Syria and Iran, for when we fail miserably.

Since the war is being (not) run by Obama, Biden, Hagel and J Effin Kerry, it’s sure to fail miserably so I guess I should be happy they have a plan B. I just  really wish they had a competent Plan A.

 

6 minutes of an exchange with J Effin Kerry, I didn’t watch it, I don’t suggest you do either.

 

Via Weasel Zippers

 

David Gregory beclowns himself, part 3,254

Posted: September 17, 2014 by socklessjoe in Fun With Media

This isn’t just the pot calling the kettle black, it’s the carbon nanotube Vantablack calling the kettle black.

David Gregory, former MTP host:

“[I]n Washington political journalism the narrative gets set, and it gets set early and built on. And things that fight the narrative get harder to report out, I think, often because of laziness in media,” Gregory said. “I think that the media…has gotten very attached to the idea that Washington is so dysfunctional and that the country is so frustrated with it. There is a self-fulfilling part of that.”

Wait, wait, wait… The lazy media doesn’t want to go against the narrative?

Yeah.  David Gregory said that.

For real.

(via Drudge)

Buzzword Bingo

Posted: September 15, 2014 by veeshir in Funniest End of Civilization Evah, Obama's Fault

Obama is Building A Coalition To Degrade And/Or Contain ISIL

Funny and endy on so many levels.

First, the funniest and endiest.

Not a one of our allies trusts Obama not to screw them and they’re all looking at craziness and invasionistas close to home.

The idea of them sending troops for some vague statements by Obama is laughable Ha Ha!

He cited Yemen and fucking Somalia as success stories!

“This strategy of taking out terrorists who threaten us, while supporting partners on the front lines, is one that we have successfully pursued in Yemen and Somalia for years,” President Obama said.

Somalia, the place that many years is even worse than Congo, Afghans say, “Dude, get a country.”

For those who’ve read Dune,Yemen has the sietches where the warriors of Allah go in between attacks to have some tea, khif and little bum boys. Sort of a Sietch Terror.

 

It gets funnier when you  realize the point men are Joe Freaking Biden, Chuck Hagel and J Effin Kerry.  (Warning! Unsafe, Head Minitrue Outlet Link!)

Secretary of State John Kerry said on Monday that the Obama administration would keep the door open to confidential communications with Iran on the security crisis in Iraq,

 

Get that? They want to be Iran’s ally, I assume because they think if we are allies with everybody then there won’t be war!!!!!!!!! They’ll have treaties!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Piss For Our Times!!!!!!!!!! You know, instead of being Iran’s ally when they go to war with Israel.

And get the other part of that endy hilarity, Kerry told the NY Times that he wanted confidential negotiations with Iran. sigh.

So what’s a mad mullah to do when the US comes hat in hand, on bended knee and tells everybody he’s doing so?

Iranian Supreme leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei announced Monday that Iran has privately (emphasis me, V)  refused U.S. requests for cooperation against the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria.

You have to love that shot at Kerry. That’s a nice touch.

Well you would have to love it if he weren’t the fucking Secretary Of Fucking State for the United Fucking States of Fucking America getting pwned by some 8th century mad mullah.

See? Funny and Endy.

But wait! There’s Still More!!!!!!! For a limited time on…ahh, who am I kidding. it  won’t be getting any better anytime soon.

…just hours after…, State Department spokeswoman Harf stated …

“To be very clear, we are not coordinating with, we do not want to coordinate with, we are not planning to coordinate with Iran in any way on Iraq, period,…

 

It’s sort of funny how often the super geniuses in the highest echelons of our gov’t have to clarify at least part of so many  prepared statements.

Or this one, Kerry today said something today  about how unfortunate it is that Iraq has been fighting ISIS by themselves.

From January this year, on a blog nobody here reads, was this tidbit,

J Effin Kerry at a press conferece. I saw part of this and expected to see this bit all over the place.

Iraq is fighting al Quaeda (now called ISIS)  in Fallujah and Ramadi (just like we did), and Kerry said this,

This is their fight,
Seriously? Not our fight? Obama’s given up on the Wo(S)T?

Of course now he has to walk back another set of comments. My favorite walkback was when he called Burma, “Myanmar”.

Now the other funny/endy part.

Why do we need a coalition? We’ll have to bribe half the assholes and then we’ll have a bunch of people who hate us back-seat driving us. Jebus, he wants Qatar and Iran. WTF?

So we’ll have allies who are not on our side and he’s pissed off our real allies so our coalition will be threadbare and worse than useless.

All we need is Iraq in our coalition.

 

He’s also already said it’s just air warfare and lawfare so ISIS just has to hunker down in big cities where Obama will not bomb them and wait out Obama’s short attention span.

So the coalition will be expensive and worse than useless, just like Obama.

We Be Boned.

Boned?

Posted: September 10, 2014 by veeshir in Funniest End of Civilization Evah, Obama's Fault

Important Update Below!!!!!!!!

So, how boned are we?

I saw Bob Beckel on the Five earlier flat out declare that ISIS cannot threaten America. He laughed, ha-HA!, at the very idea.

Now, from reading Stephen Green’s drunktweeting of Obama’s speech, I see this.

“ISIL poses a threat to Iraq and Syria…” and MAYBE to the US, eventually, someday. So we have that going for us, which is nice.

Apcray, You realize what that means? We’re sure to get hit tomorrow.

And worse, they’ve been coming in through the southern border, I live on the southern border and I have to drive across Phoenix tomorrow, from the East Valley to north west Phoenix. You all saw my commute on Monday night’s news by the way. Luckily, that wasn’t the roof of my car you saw.

So my sense of irony and appreciation of the facets of the FEOCE say I have a good chance of having to fight off a terrorist attack tomorrow. I hope it’s on the way home, I need the money.

 

I will say I hope he arms jihadis in Syria. What that country/area needs are more small arms. Let’s shake up that bottle of scorpions and get them fighting each other again.

 

The whole speech looked pretty embarrassing.

ISIL is a terrorist organization… with no vision.” Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck he still doesn’t get it

Mam am I glad I swore off POTUSpeeches long ago.

So we’re back to Clinton’s strategery with added death-dealing RC skybombery.

I thought I was making a funny when I said it was turning into all the worst parts of the 90s along with looking as if we’d lost the Cold War.

Makes me wonder if I’m going to be yelling “Wolverines!” at some point in the future.

 

 

I Lied It’s Not All That Important Just Pretty Darn Funny Update!!!!!!! 

One year ago today Obama said we should bomb Syria now he’s saying we bomb Syria’s enemies today.

 

He does like to fight both sides of any war after all. Allah noticed it.

Uh-Oh

Posted: September 8, 2014 by veeshir in Uncategorized

During Obama’s lieathon/suckfest on Meet the Sycophants Sunday was this exchange

CHUCK TODD: You realize you’re giving that speech the day before the 13th anniversary of 9/11.

PRESIDENT OBAMA: But right. And I–I want everybody to understand that we have not seen any immediate intelligence about threats to the homeland from ISIL.

 

You realize that Obama is always wrong about everything he says.

I’m happy I won’t be in  a big city or flying on 9/11 this year.

Added later to be clear, I’m not rooting for terrorists, but the day after Obama claims to unveil his strategy for dealing with ISIS (Law enforcement and drones I’d bet) is the anniversary of 9/11 and we’ve been looking weak. ISIS is not going to let that opportunity pass. I just hope the people who get blowed up see the humor. Eh, probably not. Dead and disfigured people are notorious for a lack of sense of humor. 

 

More added:

Something that’s been driving me crazy,

Ted Cruz wants to strip citizenship from Americans who join ISIS, I’m agin it and I”m pissed off at Cruz for even suggesting. it.

WTF? man. That ‘power’ would be abused so I could see in the future that membership in a tea-party means you lose your citizenship.

But what is driving me crazy is that in our security theater program we have a no-fly list. Could we perhaps get some actual terrorists on that list or is it just to jerk average people around?

Seriously. They have some thousands of people on that list, we can’t find out who, until they fly, or why, but we are powerless to stop ISIS terrorists from flying?

That’s extra fucked up.

I was just going to do a blank post but since nobody’s going to read it, I might as well put in content.

Some people who got into a land war in Asia!!!

The Ukrainians kicked out their tsarling and now they’re being invaded by Tsar Putin I but they haven’t lost their sense of humor. 

‘Russian-style’ ceasefire includes lots of shelling

These people dealt with Stalin-Hitler-Stalin, Tsar Putin I is like a walk in the park after that.

So Obama’s at the NATO meeting as they talk about the world exploding and we see this from our favorite Weasel, S.

NATO is meeting in Wales at the moment, so this doof is over our side. It was reported on the radio this afternoon that so many things are happening in NATO’s territory, there’s a chance the meeting will hold Obama’s interest this time. That, ordinarily, he finds these meetings so boring, he sends his aids out to buy crossword puzzle magazines to get him through.

I shit you not. It was a straight news broadcast, so maybe I…surely I misheard…?

You know, if everything bores you, it isn’t an indication that you’re extra super smart. If the most important job in the Western world seems beneath you, you aren’t a sooper genius. You’re a malignant narcissist and borderline retard.

 

Okay, that’s totally not funny at all because it’s true.

Hahahahahahahahahahhahaa

So as the world figures out their on their own, we might get interesting deals that drag us into a war. Yay,,,?

The NATO folks are giving some aid, but nothing military, but

Stopping short of promising to send weapons that Ukraine wants, NATO chief Anders Fogh Rasmussen noted that individual nations can make their own decisions about arming Kyiv.

France just declined to deliver the ships they were building for the Russian Imperial Navy,  so maybe they could make up the slack by selling Ukraine some stuff.

I wonder what NATO’s gonna do.  Sanctions aren’t going to do crap because if they sanction Russia, Russia raises the rates on their energy. It’s hard to economically war on someone when you’re economically dependent on that person.

 

It’s not a ‘deal’ with a Tsar/Bond Villain without a howler.

But Lavrov implied the US is hindering hopes of a swift progression towards a truce:

Okay, that’s funny.

I agree, albeit not for the same reason. I’d say it’s because Tsar Putin I knows there will be no response so he was a free hand.

You have to love this bit too.

Later on Thursday (September 4), Lavrov reportedly discussed and agreed on the need for a ceasefire with his French and German counterparts, while “avoiding any action that could undermine the positive trend.”

 

The positive trend being in the war Russia started and is waging. He’s actually playing the “Peace-Process” shell game.

That’s pretty funny.

Puppy Blender post. 

IMMIGRATION: “Not many years ago, the idea of Minnesota as a hotbed of Islamic terrorism would have been laughable. No longer: a mass immigration of Somalis has put Minnesota on the front lines.”

Gee, how could that have happened?

Muslim cab drivers refuse to transport alcohol and dogs.

What could people have done to encourage that kind of thing?

Some Muslim Cashiers at Minnesota Target Refuse to Scan Pork Products

Eh, we’ll probably never know.

A little bit of hope.

Earth will experience a close call on Sunday, as an asteroid discovered only a few days ago is expected to safely pass very close by. The space rock will zip by our planet approximately 25,000 miles above our heads – one tenth the distance between here and the moon.

Now I plugged the numbers into y Fisher-Price orbital dynamics calculator and got a different number, but we all remember the last time that happened. At least I do, but keep your fingers crossed, we might get lucky.

Last, a chuckler stolen from the Outrider, don’t tell him. He can probably kick my ass.

thanks