Archive for the ‘The Funniest Middle Of Civilization Ever!’ Category

Holy moly! We’re seeing new things! I mean, we’re seeing all the old things but with a new twist.

 

Trump is retweeting Judicial Watch discuss the coup, making me wonder if he’s actually considering my Fire the Dept of “Justice” and replace them with Judicial Watch” plan. That would be awesome.

 

Barr, the AG, told Congress about Obama and co. spying on Trump and the butthurt is awesome.

Evidence Free is going to make a comeback! Can Inadvertent and Incidental be far behind?

Let’s go back in timetwo years to March, 2017

Charles Krauthammer, who usually provides center-Right analysis, stated categorically that:
“It’s a farce, you know, the idea that everyone in this town – the media – the agencies – the congress – are running around chasing their tails on a story that everyone knows it’s not true, but having to pretend that it might be because he’s the President when we know how it’s going to end.”
This is absurd.

Yes, yes it was. I do have to wonder if it’s going to get more…how much more absurd it’s going to get. I’m not sure exactly how much more absurd we can survive.

Ace has a bunch of updates on his post that show testimony from years ago that maybe, possibly, could point out how it was an attempt at a coup. You should click over there, it’s in a much more compact form than the archives of various righty blogs from the last few years. The ‘new’ part is that our fine betters are having to notice it and/or twist into absurd contortions pretending they weren’t all in on that stupidity. They are facing a crisis. They might even have to admit to themselves that they were nitwits.

Now I wonder how happy normal Americans, even people who don’t like Trump, are going to react if there are no repercussions for felonious treason as our betters explain it away.

Is it time? Will there actually be repercussions? (warning: That’s a ‘busy’ page. Lots of stuff going on.)

The Justice Department’s watchdog is reportedly looking into an FBI informant who was a source for the bureau’s Russia investigation during the 2016 election cycle.

Inspector General Michael Horowitz’s investigators are asking questions about Stefan Halper, an American professor at Cambridge University, who met with members of President Trump’s campaign, according to the New York Times…

But wait! There’s still more!

Attorney General William Barr has assembled a “team” to investigate the origins of the FBI’s counterintelligence investigation into the Trump campaign, an administration official briefed on the situation told Fox News on Tuesday.

I have to admit, I’m even thinking of breaking out my GOP Voter Device for reals.

GOP Voter Device

I might even ‘arf’. I ain’t slapping my fins until there’s a perpwalk though.

Of course, it’s not really a Republican doing it, it’s Trump.

In spite of everything the GOP can do he’s still keeping on keeping on. They’re fighting him on his whole agenda, they just will not send him any legislation or even allow him to do what he’s trying to do. They don’t even ‘view with concern’ all the times the “Justice” Dept absolutely ignored everything judges involved in their cases had to say.

Especially considering this, someone from the RNC talking about Mueller.

MARTIN: What’s your reaction? I’m sure you have many, but what’s your top line reaction to today’s report?

DHILLON: Well, the president was completely vindicated and exonerated after two years of false allegations and really, what I consider to be a coup attempt against his presidency. But we are not cheering, most of us here on the Republican side, because it is atrocious and outrageous that the Department of Justice and the FBI and these other institutions were hijacked for a partisan end, and that for two years, our president was not allowed to fully carry out his agenda because of this cloud hanging over his presidency.

So far so good, then this

And I will also say on the other side, the Democrats in Congress don’t appear to be willing to let this go either. So I don’t think we’ve seen the end of this entire situation by a long stretch.

That’s code for, “We’ll work with our very good friends across the aisle to bring them to justice!”

It works better if you read that in John McCain’s voice and think of what legislation they’ll pass to make sure we can’t do what they did.

 

 

Here Trump’s going around Congress by doing a little creative funding,

White House officials will shift about $3.6 billion in military construction funds to build President Donald Trump’s controversial southern border wall

He’s reaching back to his construction days. Hmmmm, do you think he’ll pull out another of his faves, bankruptcy? How funny would it be if we went bankrupt. Our whole gov’t letting their phones go to voicemail. That could be a good alternative to an asteroid. Something to think about anyway.

 

Troll Level: Trumpian!

That’s getting around Congress by making them look like fools. Hypocritical fools.

Sure, he’s not very presidential in word but he surely is in deed and he’s fighting back. I’ll take it.

 

Semi-related,

Headline

There is no left left in Israel

The problem is that leftism has become utterly absurd and utterly untethered to reality.

America can survive that for a while, we’re strong and isolated from powerful enemies, Israel literally cannot survive pretending the community based reality is actual reality. They are constantly facing a literal existential threat so pretending idiocies can only ensure they’re all dead.

 

Evergreen headline:

SYRIA’S CIVIL WAR CONTINUES

Syria is a bucket of scorpions all killing each other as Allah intended.

Meanwhile, the Syrian Army continues to make indiscriminate attacks:

Huh, I didn’t realize there was a cease-fire.

You want to hear something funny? I wrote that before I read this

The Observatory said 10 people were killed in Tuesday’s attack in a “demilitarized” zone set up under the Turkish-Russian agreement.

Your shoelaces are untied!

Related, watching the Dems defend this

“CAIR was founded after 9/11 because they recognized that some people did something,

has been illuminating for many people who’d managed to avoid learning things about Dems.

 

Speaking of keeping people from learning bad things about Democrats, Jim Acosta has won an award for keeping Americans from learning bad things about Democrats while reporting made up bad things about the bad Orange Man!

 

The New York Press Club announced the recipient of their “Truth to Power” award: CNN White House correspondent Jim Acosta.

The guy who was kicked out of the press room for acting like a petulant, spoiled, tantrumy 5 year old

Truth To Power!!!!! Which in the current issue of Newspeak has this non-artist’s rendition:

 

It’s stuff like that that lets you know exactly how imaginative the Babylon Bee is, it’s really hard to think up stuff more absurd than Dems already do. Remember this?

They’ve managed to get more absurd. That takes skill….real willful-ignorance!

 

A whine. I’m sick of the phone companies and computer companies and tech companies thinking they own my phone and my computer. I’m sick of my stuff constantly “updating”, which updates are usually just things they think I need, like changing the solitaire game or something equally important. Right now every time I play solitaire I get a dialogue box that asks if I want to go online and do fun stuff!!!. It doesn’t give me the option of “No”, I can do it now or later. Since I never play solitaire while I’m online, I think I piss it off.

My phone is full of Google apps. I keep turning them off and they keep turning back on. I can turn off “Google Location Service” a brazilion times and it comes back on a brazilion and one.

As most of us saw at Ace’s, Google does manually change searches so it’s harder to find stuff they don’t want us to find.

I’m about done with Amazon too. I just don’t trust those assholes. And we see this

Amazon.com Inc. employs thousands of people around the world to help improve the Alexa digital assistant powering its line of Echo speakers. The team listens to voice recordings captured in Echo owners’ homes and offices. The recordings are transcribed, annotated

It’s for your own good! You belong them Amazon. Just because I bought the Kindle and buy the books doesn’t mean I own them. Just as with my phone and my computer.

My kindle is also always updating, I can’t stop them from doing it. They’re not fixing anything, they’re just putting in spyware and ads. When I buy a new book and connect to the tubes, it often takes 5 minutes or more before it starts downloading my books.

I’m going to start figuring out another way to get e-books. I will buy lots of actual books, but there are Kindle writers, but I’ll probably get some of them on paper. I am thinking of getting another cheap Kindle and never connecting with the one I now own again.

 

Let’s end on the Feel Good Story of the Decade!

This guy met up with some Antifa Fightin’ Fascists. They found out that, while they’re big on the fascism part, they ain’t so hot at fighting.

Yes. We bullied Antifa. We punched them in the face. We took their flags. And we ate their pizza.

First and foremost, I want to boast that I got to punch a commie. In the defense of one of my fellow Americans that was being attacked, I actually got to punch a commie. Granted, he was a weak, noodle-y looking thing, but I got a shot in before the cops stepped in the middle of it and prevented more. I also got a souvenir from one of them. I kept offering to give it back to them if one of them was brave enough to come and take it from me; sadly, the cowards didn’t take me up on it. As I advised readers not long ago, get yourself to a protest.

Heh. RTWT, it’s pretty darn fun.

That it happened in Austin just makes it sweeter.

So we’ve been watching this shit for years, decades in some instance, and yet, our fine betters are still trying to pretend we’re not seeing what we’re seeing.

I hate to have to admit this, but I have to start with a Mea Wronga.

For a few years now I’ve been saying we should fire everybody at the Dept of “Justice” and replace them with Free Republic commenters, but I wuz wrong.

We should fire them all and replace them with the fine folks at Judicial Watch. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying anything against Freepers, I’m just saying that JW is busy doing the job “Justice” is trying to stop.

The Dept of “Justice” is trying to hide evidence of high crimes and possible treason as Judicial Watch is trying to expose it.

Judicial Watch announced today that it filed a Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) lawsuit against the U.S. Department of Justice (sic) for all records of communications relating to Russian attorney Natalia Veselnitskaya’s immigration parole. (Judicial Watch v. U.S. Department of Justice (sic)(No. 1:17-cv-02357)).

Judicial Watch filed suit after the Justice(sic) Department failed to respond to an August 4, 2017, FOIA request seeking…

The ‘Russian lawyer’ who finagled a meeting with Donald Trump, Jr. evidently wasn’t supposed to be in the country,” said Judicial Watch President Tom Fitton. “We want to know what the Obama Justice (sic) Department knew and when it knew about what Ms. Veselniskava was up to.”

We know what she was up to, helping Obama’s “Justice” Dept try to fix an election by setting up bullshit charges against erstwhile Grannarch Hillary’s opponent.

I’ve come to realize we need to fire everybody in the IRS and replace them with Freepers, after JW gets done putting most of them in jail.

Emails uncovered by Judicial Watch show David L. Fish, IRS acting director of Exempt Organizations Rulings and Agreements, informing Holly Paz that another IRS employee, Joe Urban, had begun a “secret research project” with the donor lists that were improperly obtained by the IRS.

Chicago-Machine Politics writ large needs to be prosecuted and stopped, our fine betters at the Dept of “Justice” are uninterested in the rule of law, they want rule by corrupt assholes.

Of course, JW would need to hire some Freepers to do the legwork on a whole bunch of crimes done by all facets of Obama’s gov’t assholes, from Fast and Furious to…I don’t even want to remember all the lawless shit they were doing.

We need a rule of law, not Rule By Corrupt Lawyers and Bureaucrats.

 

So what are the members of our corrupt ruling class doing to get to the bottom of this shit? 

DNC Unveils Clinton Institute For Campaign Ethics Reform In Response To Corruption Allegations

That’s The Onion you say?  The Onion obviously has a time machine, their headlines are usually anywhere from a few days to a few years early, so we have that to look forward to.

Although…I could see them calling it the Obama Institute for Campaign Ethics Reform.

 

Let’s look at the Iranian/Saudi war that’s been raging across the Middle East for the last….. what? 8-12 centuries? Sure, it gets “Hot” and “Cold”, but the last few years, with Obama choosing the Iranians’ side, it got very “Hot” in Syria. But that war is about over, not sure who won, it appears to be Iran as ISIS is aligned with the Saudis.

So it’s moved to the Arabian peninsula. File this under, “Yeah, we already figured that out but it’s nice to have official confirmation.”

 Iran manufactured the ballistic missile fired by Yemen’s Shiite rebels toward the Saudi capital and remnants of it bore “Iranian markings,” the top U.S. Air Force official in the Mideast said Friday, backing the kingdom’s earlier allegations.

Leading to some hilarity. Apparently, the Little Satan isn’t thrilled with Iran winning so they’re putting their thumbs on the scale.

The foreign minister of Saudi Arabia has refused to quell rumors that his country is working with Israel to tackle the Iranian-backed group Hezbollah.

Abel Al-Jubeir said Thursday that Hezbollah, a political and militant Shia-Islamist group, has hijacked the system in Lebanon and is spreading a malign influence throughout the Middle East.

 

Sure, Saudi Arabia helps fund Palestinian jihadis, but with Iran cementing their hold on Syria and Lebanaon, Israel would like them to fight their real enemies, the people who believe in almost the same religion; the Saudis.

With Obama helping the Iranians get nukes, this is utterly unsurprising.

He said many countries want to push back against Hezbollah but would not be drawn either way on whether Saudi Arabia was now working with Israel.

That’s huge, but not really unexpected. Israel ain’t gonna nuke the Arabian peninsula because they help the Palestinian Terrortories, Iran would probably nuke the Saudis before they tried to nuke Israel because that’s what Allah wants.

 

Of course, so far as we’re concerned, we want Iran and the Saudis to focus on each other. Why?

That’s why.

 

One thing I never get, why do people take anything China does at face value?

A day before Donald Trump arrived in Beijing for crucial talks, China arrested three prominent African-American athletes.  It would be awful if this became a racial issue today back home.  A new element could be introduced into the deal-making at the heart of the presidential mission to East Asia, and these youths have a following.  They all have headshots from UCLA:

At least they don’t have head-shots from the People’s Army.

Yet.

China does not want to be friends with America, they want to use our economy to bolster their Potemkin Economy so they can afford shit like a navy, so they can threaten more places than where they can walk.

 

Fucking Africa, the people on that continent are fucked, their rulers don’t want them educated, they want them superstitious and fearful. People are easier to dominate that way.

That gives us shit like this.

 

RELATIVES dancing with the corpses of their loved ones are helping to spread the plague, officials have warned.

Madagascans have been told to stop the traditional practice of Famadihana, which sees locals dig up deceased relatives and dance with them before they are reburied, The Sun reports.

 

In the Congo they eat pygmies for some fucking reason, in some places they screw virgins to cure AIDS, they’re just fucked.

 

Let’s go to America, it’s not really funny, but it’s less murderous.

Yesterday and today mark the anniversary of Kristallnacht.

Kristallnacht also known as Night of Broken Glass was an anti-Jewish pogrom in Nazi Germany on November 9th-10th 1938.

“That’s not America!!!!!” you say, well, Tuesday we had a little Kristolnacht.

The small but vocal contingent of “NeverTrump” Republicans — those who swore never to vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 election, even if that meant handing the country to Hillary Clinton and the Democrats — were exuberant Tuesday night, as Republican gubernatorial candidates went down to defeat in New Jersey and Virginia…

The Weekly Standard section of the We’re Better and Smarter Than You Party/Never Trumpers are happy. Even though, apparently, Gillespie was a member in good standing of that party.

Yeah. The end of the beginning of putting us in our place.

Of course, it’s not even the end of the beginning, it’s just another step in the more than a decade-long process they’ve been trying since Bush was POTUS.

 

This is something I’m not surprised our fine media betters and our betters in the We’re Better and Smarter Than You Party have ignored, but why has the dextrosphere mostly ignored it as well?

Brazile, according to Newsweek, in a piece titled “DNC’S Donna Brazile Dedicated Her Book To ‘Patriot’ Seth Rich, Whose Death Made Her Fear For Own Life”,  dedicated her book in part to Rich…

, as the Post reported earlier in the weekend. She wrote that Rich’s murder haunted her and that she’d installed surveillance cameras at her home and would keep the blinds in her office window closed so she could not be seen by snipers,

When I saw that I figured I’d see a bunch of shit about it, but no, just this and some articles the day she said it. Why should she be worried about “bungling muggers” having sniper rifles? Maybe she doesn’t think his murder was a “bungled” mugging!?!?!?!?!

Weird. When I say that it’s suspicious, it’s a Conspiracy Theory!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, when Donna Brazile, former head of the DNC and Hillary’s enabler, says it, it’s Not News!!!!!!!

 

Speaking of the We’re Better and Smarter Than You Party, they’re still butthurt about Roy Moore winning the primary, so there’s no pushback on this.

When the story broke an hour ago that Roy Moore was being accused by multiple women of inappropriate sexual behavior when they were underage teens, I thought, “uh oh.” Then, I saw the source: Washington Post. A short wave of relief came over me before the real dread of our current situation took hold.

I don’t trust the Washington Post. They are among the worst journalistic predators in the country in that they claim to be the beacon of truth while constantly spinning facts to match their liberally approved narratives

He’s been in the public eye for a long time, what with some fairly ‘controversial’ rulings as judge, so why is this coming out now? You don’t need the Harvey Weinstein shit to legitimize tenuously evidenced sexual misconduct claims against a conservative, that’s just standard operating procedure.

Add in that the Wash Post has been at the forefront of Fake News about Trump and, well, this smells like week-old Obama lies.

Hell, it smells like year-old Clinton lies. And those really smell.

 

The Environmental Protection Agency (actual results usually vary) has okayed:

The environmental agency announced in a press release on Tuesday that the company has been approved to let “ZAP male” mosquitoes into the ecosystem to mate with the standard Asian Tiger female mosquito that terrorizes humans in the summer.

Male mosquitoes don’t bite, so when these specially grown ZAP insects, infected with the bacteria Wolbachia pipientis, mate with wild female mosquitoes, the resulting eggs won’t hatch. This will reduce the amount of biting, disease-carrying lady mosquitoes.

I can’t see any problems stemming from this!

Did I say that with a straight face? I’m out of practice so I’ve been practicing again is why I ask.

 

I didn’t pay much attention to this, but the story of the two women and dogs who survived after 6 months adrift in the Pacific smelled as much as a Wash Post ‘scoop’ to me. This guy has the knowledge and boredness to actually look into their claims.

19 REASONS THIS “SURVIVAL” STORY SMELLS FISHY

If I had seen this bit about sharks I would have called bullshit immediately, I find it hard to believe that even today’s journalists are stupid enough to buy it.

“I’m telling you I’ve never seen any Stanley Cup winner come even close to the precision these five sharks had. Three would get on one side and two would get on the other side, and they would make waves and try to knock down the boat.”

“I told [the dogs] not to bark because the sharks could hear us breathing. They could smell us”

Although… I shouldn’t be surprised. Our fine media betters learned all their history from movies, and since SyFy movies made their leftward lurch that must have become their Science/Discovery Channel, what they watch instead of Shark Week. Still, the lack of fully filled bikinis should have clued them it was Fake News.

They’re apparently even more stupid than even I expected. And that’s saying something.

He does some speculating, that seem pretty rock-solid to me.

They’re expecting publicity (mission accomplished) and maybe a book deal. Maybe a TV special. Maybe an episode of “I Shouldn’t Be Alive.” Hell, maybe a movie. They’re attention whores.

Yup.

 

I have to admit, I’m torn on this one.

Hackers from the UK-based security firm Pen Test Partners have found that it’s trivially easy to hack into a Svakom Siime Eye, a $249 Internet of Things dildo that has a small camera on its tip, allowing users to stream a video to anyone of their choosing over the internet. However, if you’re in Wi-Fi range of the dildo and can guess the password, which by default is “88888888,” you can watch the video stream. With a bit more hacking, you can take control of the firmware and then connect to it remotely as well.

As noted at the link, these things don’t always go into the vagina, just saying. So if they end up looking up someone’s ass, isn’t actually accomplishing that goal punishment enough?

 

200 Quatloos on Riki Tikki Tavi!

A  Scottish pro golfer captured video of a cobra battling a mongoose for its life on a South African course during the European Tour’s Nedbank Golf Challenge.

Fuck Nagaina.

 

Above the Post

WTF?!?!?!?!?! Matty Fucking Ice can’t do it all, but when he needed to do it he couldn’t.

Tom Brady always does what he has to do.

Knew It.

Dr. John Bates, the former principal scientist at the National Climatic Data Center in Asheville, N.C., told the Daily Mail NOAA’s 2015 study was meant “to discredit the notion of a global warming hiatus and rush to time the publication of the paper to influence national and international deliberations on climate policy.”

Bates said NOAA scientists made a “blatant attempt to intensify the impact” of global warming to eliminate the “pause” in temperature rise since 1998. The Daily Mail claims Bates showed it “irrefutable” evidence NOAA’s study relied on “unverified” data.

 

Global Warmmongers lie. It’s what they do.

 

I did not know that.

Putin admired his (Super Bowl V) diamond ring and Kraft let him try it on.

“I could kill someone with this ring,” Putin remarked. When Kraft put out his hand to get his ring back, Putin — surrounded by three KGB agents — pocketed the ring and took off.

Geez, I knew Putin was a thuggish, midievil thug, but that’s fucking brazen. That happened when Bush was POTUS, why the fuck didn’t he do something about that?

 

I knew that.

The mistakes have not just been from newer liberal news outlets such The Huffington Post or BuzzFeed, but from legacy media like Reuters, The Washington Post, and The New York Times.

What follows are several botched stories or conflicting reports since President Trump took office.

They’re not so much “mistakes” as “deliberate lies” and that last sentence is pretty misleading. What they “botched” was that they’re not smart enough to actually come up with plausible lies so they keep getting caught.
I did not know that.

Your family (in Yemen V) is suffering because our president (Trump V) is reckless…and his administration is incompetent,” Pelosi said. “How and why they did this is because they’re grand illusionists. Every time they have a problem with something, they create another problem.”

So it’s Trump’s fault that Yemen is Sietch Terror.

Oh wait, that’s just Nancy Pelosi foaming at the mouth until words come out.

I already knew that.

 

I knew that.

A major newspaper demands Patriots’ quarterback Tom Brady answer for his support of President Trump. Lady Gaga will use her halftime show to sing about “equality” and “inclusion.” The insufferable and polarizing cast of “Hamilton” will sing “America the Beautiful.” There will be not one but two ads hectoring us over the issue of immigration.

Lefties have to politicize everything. Including the Super Bowl.

I’ve been flipping to Star Trek on BBC instead of commercials. I’ll be outside reading for half-time. I’ll read tomorrow about what I’m supposed to be OUTRAGED!!! about.

Or…I could just laugh as they’re really just frothing and creating new Trump voters with every screech.

 

Via SC Cop, Everybody should know this.

footmassage

If you’re stupid enough to accept a foot massage from a stranger, you cannot complain about anything that guy does to you.

 

My simple, chronic, boner just won’t go away. I try to find stuff but all I can do is laugh my ass off.

I watched CNN yesterday during one of Anderson Cooper’s shows and it was fucking hilarious.

Paul Begala started off by saying that what Trump  was doing was pretty good, “HOWEVER… his intention to (some lefty-fantasy/fake news)..”

Whereupon Anderson came out and said, “Ummm, Paul, that’s been shown to be not accurate.” Begala did not know what to say for a second. He’s not used to reality intruding on CNN panels.

I wonder if Anderson is feeling a little embarrassed that Trump has been treating his company the way I treat Charmin.

The whole show kept going like that. They were freaking out about how Trump seems to care more about Americans than foreigners! Even the fucking French?!?!?!!? but all they had was Fake News that kept just falling apart.

I have to restrict my CNN watching or my boner is gonna burst.

Let’s Tube!

Ace linked this, I’m gonna have to disagree with it.

The consternation and outrage we’ve seen in response to President Trump’s executive order on immigration has little to do with the policy as such.

Good so far. This bit is Teh Awesome.

Progressives have reacted with moral indignation and hysteria to everything Trump has done since taking office. His inauguration was enough to bring out hundreds of thousands of protesters across the country. In the 12 days since then, we have witnessed yet more demonstrations, boycotts, calls for “resistance,” comparisons to the Holocaust, media witch-hunts, the politicization of everything from Hollywood awards shows to professional sports, and real tears from New York Sen.Chuck Schumer.

One is hard-pressed to think of something Trump could do that would not elicit howls of outrage from the Left. On Tuesday,

And it’s been fucking high-larious. I’m not sure if I can watch Schumer crying again, I’m gonna give myself a hernia laughing so damn hard.

Rather, it has everything to do with the elevation of progressive politics to the status of a religion—a dogmatic and intolerant religion, whose practitioners are now experiencing a crisis of faith.

Yup, still good. Here’s where I think the big mistake is though.

Such a faith necessitates an obsession with politics, and provokes a burning desire for control over the levers of government power. If we are consumed by politics in the age of Trump, it is not because of Trump. It is because progressives have made politics into a god, and their god is failing them.

See, I think it’s a case of extreme cognitive dissonance.

They are sure the world is a certain way. Their whole self-worth is tied up in their being smart, caring, tolerant and just the bestest people ever. They’re smarter than I because they believe certain things. That’s an immutable fact, as it becomes clear that most of the shit they’ve been screeching for the last few decades is not “smart”, it’s actually pretty stupid and they can’t handle that.

The world is not cooperating and it’s freaking them the fuck out. It’s unpossible that they are not smarter and more tolerant than those evil Rethuglicans with their sky fairy. That’s how they can screech about Nazis as they’re violently stopping opposing viewpoints from even being aired.

Right now CNN is freaking out about Kelly Ann Conway conflating two terror attacks, one successful and one not. She’s obviously stupid because she can’t keep all the murderous actions and attempted murderous actions of our fine, terrorist-American community.
Saw this at Ace’s

https://twitter.com/Coondawg68/status/827489554986852352

 

Exactly.

So what’s the point? Well, until the world explodes and we start fighting all the wars Obama made likely, let’s hope this happens.

If California declares itself a “sanctuary state,” it is saying that it is no longer obeying the laws of the United States. In other words, it has seceded from the nation, just as surely as Southern states seceded from the Union in 1861….

By the way, once California has been declared to be in a state of secession, its entire congressional delegation, including both senators (both Democrats, by the way), will not be able to vote in Congress. The precedent was set during and after the Civil War. Any other states with delusions of grandeur may want to consider that.

Oh man would that make me laugh my ass off.
Lefties have become used to Making Grand Gestures!!!!!! that used to result in getting beat up and thrown in jail, only now they’re celebrated, feted and called “Brave!!!!!”

So they’re trying their Grand Gesture!!! only now there are  consequences.

I’ll leave you with this.

 

https://twitter.com/Fasdrak/status/824567464998699008?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

 

So could I.

That special snowflake thought she could invade his personal space and be a fucking retard, she was utterly unready for any response. Being a fuckhead-lefty used to not have negative consequences. Let’s see how brave lefties are when there are consequences.

I’ve been told he used pepper-spray, but it’s subtle.

It actually doesn’t matter if he did or not, the result would have been the same. If he had said, “Could you please stop doing that.” she’d be screeching about all Teh Fascism and evil.

 

We’ve on the crazy train folks and it’s the express.

Palestinian officials are demanding an apology after the new United Nations chief told Israel Radio that the Temple destroyed by the Romans was a Jewish temple.

No, really.

 

Terrorists are committing acts of terror in Muslim countries and fleeing to EUnuchstan to hide.

A Tunisian asylum-seeker arrested in Germany on suspicion of planning an attack, is also wanted by Tunisia over links to an assault on the Bardo museum in Tunis.

But limiting ‘refugees’ is the worst thing in the history of ever.

 

Trump’s screwing with CNN.

“I’m not going to sit around and engage with people who have no desire to actually get something right,” he said during an event at George Washington University this week.

Trump administration officials have been conspicuously absent on CNN since the middle of January while appearing on many other news shows.

That’s hilarious. They haz sad faces.

 

I will say that I’m wondering what he’s going to do to the IRS. The only thing he’s done so far is tell them to drop the “mandate”, but what’s he going to do to drive them around the bend? I can only assume it’s going to be awesome as he’s taking so long to get it rolled out.
If there’s one thing a successful businessman in America hates it’s the IRS and now Trump is their boss. He doesn’t even need Congress for most of it, they work directly for him.

Oh man am I looking forward to that.

 

NBC is going to be the next Foxnews!!!!!

You know, except they’ll be the “Left-wing Foxnews!!!!!!!!!”, because we don’t have enough left-wing agit-prop outlets.

If they think hiring Megyn Kelly is a way to become conservative, well, that’s just funny.

 

Chicago is taxing bags at grocery stores.  First, gonna juxtapose two quotes

Beginning Wednesday, you’ll have to pay 7 cents for a bag at many stores across the city — the latest effort to try to cut down on the use of disposable bags.

The new tax replaces the former plastic bag ban,…

What: It applies to both paper and plastic bags.

It’s to save the Earth From Plastic Bags!!!!!!!!! so we’re going to charge for paper bags too.

But this is why I linked.

Is anyone exempt?: Yes. The tax doesn’t apply to bags use (sic)to carry items bought with federal food stamp benefits.

 

That ain’t right. Although… with the recent upsurge in food-stamp usage, I’m gonna guess a lot of people will not be paying it.

 

What the hell happened to Harley? Is their marketing target SJW?

A visit to the Harley-Davidson factory in Milwaukee by President Trump has been canceled over the company’s worry that there might be protests related to his immigration and refugee ban, an administration official told CNN on Tuesday.

 

Why the  hell would they care? Hell, put out an announcement that Harley riders will get a free Harley cup or shirt and they’d have about a thousand ‘counter-protesters’ in short order.

 

If Trump wants to send CNN totally around the bend he should reverse all Obama-care waivers.

Are Obamacare waivers Constitutional?

I know Obama can pardon people, but can he also say “Go ahead and break the law”?

Seriously, isn’t that what non-US-Constitution countries do? Aren’t we a nation of laws?

Can he give out waivers for murder, barratry and loitering too?

I know he can pardon you afterward, but how is it legal to say, “Go ahead and break the law that we all declared to be the Most Important Thing Ever or We Were All Gonna Die!“?

At this point, what does Constitutionality matter?

Take away all waivers and give waivers to all people who didn’t have one. Let’s see Minitrue explain how it was OK for Obama to waiverize but IT’S THE END OF THE REPUBLIC!!!!!!! if Trump does it. Then Trump gets to make fun of them even more.

 

Okay, this one makes me laugh.  I always love ‘hoist on your own retard’ stuff.

Thousands of angry demonstrators gathered outside Sen. Chuck Schumer’s luxury Brooklyn apartment building — holding up signs and chanting “What the f–k, Chuck?!” — to protest his lukewarm stance on President Trump’s cabinet picks.

“Senator Schumer needs to know we’re watching him,” fumed Brad Wolchansky, a 40-year-old soccer coach from Flatbush who was carrying a cardboard cutout of a giant eye on Tuesday night.

The Dems have their supporters so wound up and violent that they’re going to have to DO SOMETHING!!!!!!! or be torn limb from limb.

Moderation when fighting Worse Than Hitler is a sin against Goodthink!

 

What with all the fooforaw over Trump’s picks, I didn’t realize he had already EO’d Obamacare! Apparently the rollout wasn’t well thought out.

During a special session called for by President Trump on the day of his presidential inauguration, House and Senate leaders repealed Obamacare and replaced it with a system run by the VA, sources say. Now just days after Trump’s inauguration, the incredible efficiency of VA health care has claimed the lives of more than nine million people in hospitals across America.

 

It’s not funny cuz it’s true.

 

Surprising nobody, Chuck Todd admits the obvious

NBC’s Chuck Todd confessed that he and others in the mainstream news media played down just how despised Hillary Clinton was in the heartland…

Then denies it.

…due to the fear of appearing “sexist.”

No, you played it down because you were trying to get the Golden Cow elected and lying about her was your best chance. Although an alternate explanation would be, “Due to fear of our fine, tolerant lefty friends ripping us limb from limb if we told the truth about the Golden Cow.

 

I am sorry I missed this one last week.

White House press secretary Sean Spicer told the Washington Post in August that he chews and swallows a massive amount of Orbit’s cinnamon flavored gum.

A Google news search of “cinnamon gum” leads to numerous stories written this week about the press secretary’s habit, which Spicer has said has been cleared by his personal doctor. Trevor Noah even took time out of his failing broadcast to “mercilessly skewer” Spicer for chewing so much gum.

Some outlets such as Washingtonian, which put six reporters  on the task…

Seriously? Gum-gate? They’re just flailing around, trying to make something, ANYTHING!!!!, stick.

 

I guess it depends on what you mean by that.

Media’s Trump hysteria is doing more harm than good

So what’s he mean?

Though these “scoops” sound jaw-dropping, they often fall apart the moment an ounce of scrutiny is applied. This is obviously bad for consumers who just want the news. It’s also bad for an industry whose credibility is already greatly diminished.
But rather than learning from experience, and applying a greater measure of caution to sensational-sounding news reports, many in the press are still rushing to share stories that keep turning out to be overblown.

I’d say it’s working to make journalists look like the partisan lying sacks of ignorant shit they are, so it’s doing much more good than harm. Identifying a problem is the first step in putting all those assholes on unemployment.

 

The funniest part, for me, is watching them screech about Trump Destroying Press Freedom after 9 years of Obama’s assault on a fully compliant media. It was ridiculous for him to attack them, but he’s a Chicago-machine fuckhead, that’s what they do.

But if we’re to take these apostles of press freedom seriously, they should first explain why the Trump Administration is worse than the Obama Administration.

After all, the Obama Administration literally tried imprisoning an uncooperative journalist, monitored journalists’ every digital move, and “hammered” at least one challenging reporter with IRS audits.

Shove your hate and lies up your ass Minitrue.

He had probably one tough interview in 9 years, and how did it go?

Shortly after I did my April 2012 interview with President Obama, my wife, friends and some viewers suggested that I might need to watch out for the IRS.
I don’t accept “conspiracy theories”, but I do know that almost immediately after the interview, the IRS started hammering me.
At the time, I dismissed the “co-incidence”, but now, I have concerns … after revelations about the IRS targeting various groups and their members.
Originally, the IRS apologized for red-flagging conservative groups and their members if they had “Tea Party” or “patriot” in their name.
Today, there are allegations that the IRS focused on various groups and/or individuals questioning or criticizing government spending, taxes, debt or how the government is run … any involved in limiting/expanding government, educating on the constitution and bill of rights, or social economic reform/movement.

But Trump is The Worst Thing Ever because he treats the media like the lying sacks of partisan shit they are.

 

Let’s look at our fine media betters’ standard standard.

It’s been funny watching them have to admit that the Billion Wymyn’s March was a leftist/partisan progfest, but they’re still trying to hide the hate and evil coming from it.

linda-sarsour-hate-tweet

Ayaan Hirsi Ali is a victim of female, genital mutilation. In other words, some 7th century savage already savaged her vagina with a piece of broken glass.

The worst evil our media does is hide the evil of people who would happily behead them for their views.

This article wonders why our fine media betters treat billionaire preppers differently from non-super-rich preppers.

I’ll explain. They suck the dick of lefties and hate people who don’t believe in their religion.

 

Something else our fine media betters are uninterested in, Democrat-Voter-Fraud.

Illegal alien voters combined with dead and “multiple state” voters could easily explain Clinton’s “popular vote” margin over Donald Trump in the 2016 presidential election, especially considering that her “victory” came from Democratic-controlled counties known for illegal immigration and loose voter ID laws such as in New York and California.

“A report by the Pew Center on the States finds that more than 1.8 million dead people are currently registered to vote, and 24 million registrations are either invalid or inaccurate,” NPR reported in 2012, which is ironic given how NPR is heavily controlled by Democrats.

And many of the dead, registered voters somehow keep voting Democrat from beyond the grave, most recently in Philadelphia, Penn. and Colorado.

The dead and illegals vote Democrat, except in Mississippi, where GOP types like Haley Barbour, act like Dems (as we can recall from the run-off where they bused in Dem voters to beat the Republican),

 

Law & Order: Special EUnuchs Unit!

 

A popular crime drama on German state TV featured a storyline where a group of ethnic Germans molested a Muslim woman in the streets.

The show, named “Tatort,” aired earlier this month on the taxpayer funded ARD network.

“Notice that this whole episode focuses on evil right-wingers and a bunch of happyfaced refugees,” the YouTube uploader wrote in the description to the video.

“In fact they show this woman getting beaten up after having tried to apply at the German Police. Just wat.”

Because they always have to have the same “twist” where the real terrorists are westerners.

Taxpayer funding for a show that hates on taxpayers is a nice touch.

By “Nice” I mean, “That’s why we have Trump.”

 

Thank Heaven for Maria the Dildo-Dipper! Minitrue is going to need a lot of woobies from all the losing they’re going to be doing.

https://twitter.com/_youhadonejob1/status/821436397697515525

 

For the rest of us, The universe giveth!

There are Giant Clouds of Alcohol Floating in Space…

the cloud is 1000 times larger than the diameter of our solar system. It contains enough ethyl alcohol to fill 400 trillion trillion pints of beer. To down that much alcohol, every person on earth would have to drink 300,000 pints each day—for one billion years.

And the Universe taketh away!

Sadly, for those of you planning an interstellar pub crawl, the cloud is 58 quadrillion miles away (10,000 light-years V, loose shit fixed). It’s also a cocktail of 32 compounds, some of them as nasty as carbon monoxide, hydrogen cyanide, and ammonia.

 

Sonomabatch.

 

An object at laugh

mattis-babies

Will stay at laugh.

 

An object at Froth

global-worming

 

Tends to stay at Froth.

 

Picture Post!

Perception is everything.

buiding-an-ar15-vs-ak47

Contrary to what you were told

answers

 

Reality, she is a bitch.

haha

 

So…classy or do you think Abbi has some…history?

happy-birthday

 

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

he-who-laughs-last

 

Socialism For The Win!

isnt-socialism-great

 

Just cuz it ain’t as endy doesn’t mean it’s not even fucking funnier.

No, really. That happened.

 

How the press sees Trump

behind-the-curtain

How Trump sees the press

naughty-list

 

How I see the left

ralph-helping

 

We’re waiting for the chirp, chirp, chirp of an agenda being born!

yup

For every action there’s an equal and stupid reaction.

Peggy Noonan is still upset we didn’t vote for Jeb!.  (and even more upset that exclamation point is sarcastic)

Here she is whining about Trump saying nice things to Teh Peepul and mean things to our betters.

He presented himself not as a Republican or a conservative but as a populist independent. The essential message: Remember those things I said in the campaign? I meant them. I meant it all.

She’s not used to that. All right-thinking pols know you say anything to get elected and then can safely ignore teh peepul until the next election.

Normally a new president has someone backing him up, someone publicly behind him. Mr. Obama had the mainstream media—the big broadcast networks, big newspapers, activists and intellectuals, pundits and columnists of the left—the whole shebang. He had a unified, passionate party. (You forgot the Look At The Great Creases! folks like you V)

Mr. Trump in comparison has almost nothing. The mainstream legacy media oppose him, even hate him, and will not let up. The columnists, thinkers and magazines of the right were mostly NeverTrump; some came reluctantly to support him.

His party is split or splitting. The new president has gradations of sympathy, respect or support from exactly one cable news channel, and some websites.

He really has no one but those who voted for him.

And the more you assholes talk the more people realize that all we have on our side is Trump.

 

Nother minitrue-mistake! that somehow made Spicer look bad. They dowdified a quote (cut it short to change the meaning).

I’m sure they’re sorry about it. Not sorry enough to stop lying, just sorry about getting caught.

 

Fakenewsers just don’t get it.

Secretary of State Rex Tillerson’s job running the State Department just got considerably more difficult. The entire senior level of management officials resigned Wednesday, part of an ongoing mass exodus of senior foreign service officers who don’t want to stick around for the Trump era.

No, his job just got easier, it was going to be very hard to fire all those anti-American assholes. The more quit the fewer he has to fire or ‘promote’ to his super-important think-tank! that thinks and can’t do.

 

I’m gonna get on a watch list I’m buying so much saltpeter for my simple, chronic boner.

 

Environmental Protection Agency employees have not accepted Donald Trump’s victory and are still “coming to work in tears” more than two months after the election.

“At EPA headquarters, the mood remains dark,” ProPublica reported Wednesday. “A longtime career communications employee said in a phone interview Tuesday that more than a few friends were ‘coming to work in tears’ each morning as they grappled with balancing the practical need to keep their jobs with their concerns for the issues they work on.”

 

I knew it would be good, but I didn’t realize how good.

 

Of course, the bureaucracy is going to be in a war with Trump for so long as he is POTUS.

Government employees from more than a dozen federal agencies in the United States have opened rogue Twitter accounts, concerned by what they see as President Trump’s attempts to stifle government scientific research and scale back the country’s Obama-era commitments to combating climate change.

I look forward to many, many, many, “You’re Fired!”s.

 

I’m not sure why the DNC is auditioning for Trump Re-Election folks, but there it is.

 

Keep America Great!

 

Someone tell Hollywood you only need to tithe, throwing $hundreds of millions away is not really a smart way to honor your religious beliefs.

Universal has won a heated bidding war to pick up the rights to Little America, a futuristic adventure movie that has Michael Bay and his Platinum Dunes on board to produce….

Described by sources as a “sci-fun” story rather than “sci-fi,” the tale is set in a dystopian future where a Donald Trump-like president has bankrupted America and China has called in its debts.

Geez, they picked the stupidest religion. I do find it hilarious that they claim Trump is going to bankrupt America. Obama and the fine GOP-led Congress already have that covered.

Now if they had us start blowing up Chinese armies when they call in their debts, that movie might actually make money. Too bad they won’t do that. China is paying for it after all.

 

Remember the vid of the kid proud of starting a fire at the We Hate Amerikkka riots the other day?  That was Drew Carey’s kid.

Jebus, didn’t he used to be a fucking libertarian?  What the fuck is wrong with the drugs in Hollywood?

 

In, There’s No Proof Of Voter Fraud (right Shep?) News.

This link has links to others talking about how illegal aliens vote all the time.

This one shows that the Green Party’s scam/recount effort uncovered plenty of voter fraud (just regular Dem voter fraud, probably not illegals)

In Michigan, where Trump has been certified the winner in spite of Stein’s efforts, Wayne County (Detroit), where Clinton overwhelmingly won, has come under fire explicitly due to the recount. Turns out in 37 percent of the Detroit precincts more votes were cast than the number of people who showed up to the polls to vote. No one would have noticed if not for the personal enrichment recall scheme of the former Green Party presidential candidate.

Oh man can I not wait until people like Shep, who declared that Foxnews Knows Of No Evidence Of Voter Fraud!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yesterday, have to talk about all the Democrat-Party-Bought-And-Paid-For Voter Fraud!.

That’s gonna be funny.

 

So….they raised the minimum wage and restaurants are closing!?!?!?!!?!?!? Shouldn’t that have increased jobs?

Upward of 60 restaurants around the Bay Area have closed since the start of September alone, with many citing difficulties like the cost of finding and keeping good employees, rising rents, new requirements for providing health care and sick leave, and doing it all while competing with the slew of new dining options.

Kudos for mentioning Obamacare and other Dem stupidities, but notice the elephant not in the room.

They have some stuff about how stupid people talk about minimum wage increases being responsible, but they let you know that’s crazy-talk.

Being a lefty means never admitting that you’re wrong. Especially to yourself.

 

At Paco’s the other day, commenter MikeW, mentioned that there’s a grain of truth in most Duffelblog posts.

Case in point.

A new plan touted by President Donald Trump to end the nearly six-year-long Syrian Civil War has reportedly stalled after the president and his staff realized they did not have enough different colors and (Risk V) pieces to represent all the different factions in the country, sources confirmed today…

Trump had planned to use a single colored army to represent “all the Syrians,” sources say, but he was apparently foiled once he realized there was no brown army. Instead, he began using blue for American forces, red for Russian, black for ISIS, gray for rebels, green for Turkey, and yellow for Kurds.

However, he realized there were not enough colors after the CIA presented a list of 12 former and current Al Qaeda affiliates that were also fighting inside the country, along with at least 30 other non-governmental tribes, armies, militias and terror groups.

Too many scorpions in that bucket.

This one gets to me.

Advisers from the Department of Defense have been trying in vain to persuade Trump to take a more nuanced and academically rigorous view of the conflict. So far they have only been successful in convincing him that “taking Australia on turn one and sitting on the Indonesian bottleneck until we can build up our forces” would be a terrible idea.

 

I always fall for that.

 

 

Important Above the Post Twitter Video That’s Awesome!
In Portland, Oregon they’re protesting the police by shutting down traffic. I love the way they get the crowd on their side.

Is that beautiful or what? As the cops start tackling them the crowd cheers and people start blowing their horns. I like the guy who’s pointing the cops at the asshole prostestors.
Now, back to our post, the next part is sorta about a textual example of the above vid.
Via Twitchy.

I’m not sure how many of you read Ace, but this is fucking beautiful.

It’s pretty long but well worth the read.

It’s this (Obama attacking some poor pizzeria owners in Indiana at a correspondent’s dinner V) that sent me to a place from which I’ll never return. I literally don’t care what Donald Trump does because nothing he can do is worse than what they’ve already done.

Donald Trump isn’t the bully; he only insults and abuses people in power who have attacked him. They’re the fucking bullies. The left, with their smears, their witch hunts, their slanders, their insults and their weaponizing of the federal bureaucracy.

There aren’t any rules anymore because the left only applies them one way. And in doing so, they’ve left what once was a civil compact between the two parties in smoldering ruins.

I have no personal investment in Donald Trump. He is a tool to punish the left and roll back their ill-gotten gains, no more and no less. If he succeeds even partially in those two things, then I’ll consider his election a win.

Preach it. That bit about Trump only insulting and abusing people in power is one of Trump’s best attributes.

He punches up. If you punch down, like fucking Obama attacking a particular, Boston cop, you’re nothing but a punk-ass bully.

RTWT if you haven’t already.

Once again, CNS buries the lede.

The Internal Revenue Service sent 23,994 tax refunds worth a combined $46,378,040 to “unauthorized” alien workers who all used the same address in Atlanta, Ga., in 2011, according to the Treasury Inspector General for Tax Administration (TIGTA).

Geez, that must me some huge slum-tenement with 24,000 residents! How can Atlanta allow that to be?!?!?!?!?! I mean, we know there’s no illegal alien fraud for Trump to find! They respect our laws!
I’ve been watching a lot of Buzzr TV, I love it. I’ve always liked Match Game and I’ve been getting into the old Family Feud as well as watching some of the other ones. Young Alex Trebec is hilarious in his polyester suits with white shoes and belt. I used to love Beat the Clock. I even had the home game! It was awesome.

You can surely tell it’s the 70s. I don’t miss those days, but the casual racism and sexism is crazy to watch.

Richard Dawson and Gene Rayburn pretty much molest every hot contestant they can get their hands on. They scare the hot chick sitting next to Richard on Match Game too. One episode I thought they were going to take off Elaine Joyce’s very not, halter top. She thought so too. She tried to keep a smile on her face, but she was pretty scared. They just kept going.

A girl, 18 and married with a kid, was on Family Feud in the last couple of days, when Richard asked, “Do you work?” she responded, “Ladies don’t work” in an adorable Tennessee accent. The contestants say stuff all the time you would never, ever hear anybody today say.

They had Cowboys against Cowboy Cheerleaders on Family Feud and Richard made a joke about a black man not needing to go to the beach, I thought Tony Dorsett was going to smack him. His look was priceless. The cheerleaders didn’t make it to the final part so he didn’t get to do anything but kiss them and sorta fondle their shoulders. Poor Richard.

When Match Game has a black guy in the upper left spot, they say shit that just cracks me up. The questions have shit that’s pretty much just racist and the guy has to smile and laugh. Questions about watermelon or fried chicken. I mean, it’s not funny cuz they are really racist, but it is cuz they’re such caring lefties and let you know all the time with all their “causes” and praising St. Jimmeh and bashing and hissing over Ford and Nixon.

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Dammit, they were doing so well.

 

Corruption Will Explode Under Trump!!!!!!!!!

BERLIN — People who turn to populist politicians promising to upset the status quo and end corruption may only be feeding the problem, an anti-corruption watchdog group warned Wednesday.

Transparency International said in its annual Corruption Perceptions Index for 2016 that in countries with populist or autocratic leaders, “instead of tackling crony capitalism, those leaders usually install even worse forms of corrupt systems.”

Man, they’re going all out to get him.

No, corruption explodes under corrupt gov’ts.

Let’s look and see! Now, I could go easy and just check the archives here to do some good, old, Obama/Clinton/typical Dem corruption, but let’s look to the opposite of a populist gov’t.

EUnuchstan!

Corruption is a growing problem in the EU because leaders have been busy dealing with other crises, it’s been claimed.

Those other crises? Started by EUnuch oligarchs.

 

Brazil is not populist but..

A judge, overseeing Brazil’s biggest corruption case, has died after the plane he was travelling in crashed off the coast of Rio de Janeiro.

Huh, I wonder if he knew anything about Clintonorruption?

 

Is this corruption or just a bunch of slimy EUnuchs?

Parliament must vote on whether the government can start the Brexit process, the Supreme Court has ruled.

See, just because they pretend to have a democracy that doesn’t mean that the oligarchs have to listen to votes they don’t like.

I do like this

But the court ruled the Scottish Parliament and Welsh and Northern Ireland assemblies did not need a say.

It’s funny how little the English have changed in the last 10 centuries.

The answer to the first question is, of course, Both! They’re corrupt and slimy!

That is why we have Trump. Of course, Europe doesn’t usually get a Trump, they get Napoleon, Hitler, Attilla, Theodoric and other dictators.

Good luck EUnuchstanian oligarchs!

 

Man do I feel sorry for these poor bastards.

Desertification and poverty, compounded by Boko Haram’s violence, have left 11 million people desperately in need of aid – more than 7 million surviving, if they can, on one meal a day.

Alarm bells about the humanitarian catastrophe in Nigeria, Cameroon, Chad and Niger have been sounded by the United Nations.

So it’s either starve or die under the guns of the Religion of Peace or be forced to be sex slaves for UN ‘Peacekeepers’. That’s some choice.

 

Let’s Trump for a while.

Popcorn‘s a poppin’! We saw the beginning of this yesterday.

 

PRESS: The election was hacked.

TRUMP: There was a lot of voter fraud.

PRESS: That’s ridiculous. Where’s your evidence? I demand an investigation!

TRUMP: Okay, we’ll do an investigation: President Donald Trump Vows to Launch ‘Major Investigation’ Into Alleged Voter Fraud.

Hardee har har har.

I’m watching Spicer’s press conference and the media seems not so interested in an actual investigation. Huh, why it’s almost as if they’re Dem operatives trying to keep Dem voter fraud alive!

 

Okay, this is awesome and necessary.

Trump’s Generals, Pt. 1: President’s security pros replace Obama political ‘hacks’

I can’t wait until Pt. 2, replacing the political generals who Obama wanted to make sure would fire on American citizens.

Is Trump the perfect successor to Obama? It will take someone with a lot of energy and ability to keep his eye on the ball to gut all the socialist/hate-Amerikkka things Obama’s done to our nation.

 

Saying the right things,

Our gross national debt has increased to almost $20 trillion,” Mulvaney said. “That number is so large as to defy description. I choose to look at it another way: to an ordinary American family, that translates to a credit card bill of $260,000. Families know what that would mean for them. It is time for government to learn the same lesson.”

Continuing, Mulvaney said he felt “as a matter of principle” that the debt is problem that requires immediate action.

 

We’re so boned over debt, I hope Trump and his peeps have an idea. Since so many people like to pretend there is such a thing as International Law, is there a provision for bankruptcy? I picture Tillerson letting all his calls go to voicemail.

Asking the question, Do you have to be a conservative to launch a conservative group?

Former presidential candidate Evan McMullin and his running mate Mindy Finn will launch a new conservative group on Wednesday that’s opposed to President Trump,

The answer? Of course not. So long as you can be used to attack Trump you can call yourself whatever the hell you want.

 

The Senate keeps losing Trump’s VA pick’s paperwork!

Sources close to the nominee confirmed that repeated calls to Senate leaders with questions about his claim have so far gone nowhere, since he is immediately placed on hold just seconds after dialing.

Roughly seven hours and 160 iterations of Bernie Sanders singing “Pineapple Pen” later, the only answer Shulkin has received was an automated message explaining that “all Cabinet nominations are confirmed in the order they are received.”

 

Sonomabatch!

 

I didn’t realize that kangaroos were in the Mob! Which leads us to Joey, The ‘Roo, Valachi!

A truck driver who transported kilograms of meth, cocaine and ecstasy from Sydney to Western Australia has been jailed for more than 16 years for his integral part in the interstate syndicate – which was foiled, in part, by a seven-foot kangaroo.

I hope Oz has a  good witness protection program.

 

High Praise! to Harvey for finding an article on Where’s Waldo with links to stories about Where’s Waldo trivia.

I though Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots: The Movie and Hungry, Hungry Hippos: The TV show were bad, but this is redonculus.

EXCLUSIVE: Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg are in talks to come aboard Where’s Waldo, the live-action MGM film based on the Classic Media franchise about the wool hatted-kid you spot in the crowd.

Is there nobody in Hollywood who can think? If you gonna have a movie about one-panel comics, how about The Fucking Far Fucking Side or Calvin and Fucking HOBBES@!@!1jihoawefljdkh you stupid sonsomabatches@!@!!@#!

Sorry, I get wound up. Where was I?

Oh yeah, is it me or are these people missing the whole point?

 

Now if I had both eyes, I’m pretty sure I’d be a retired Marine right now so I can generally be counted on to support them, but contrary to popular claims, free beer can be bad beer.

Soon after President Donald Trump signed an executive order to authorize construction of the Keystone Pipeline, a large portion of the nation’s military service members applauded the move as a helpful step towards more accessible domestic beer.

That is until Marine Pvt. Jeff Ertley visited the existing length of pipeline while on leave and was disappointed to discover the 1,179-mile pipeline is actually not full of Keystone Light.

 

Jebus. Life is too short to drink horse piss. We should have kept Germany or Belgium if we wanted good beer.