Archive for the ‘PEBKAC’ Category

moron

Boy am I burned out. Watching all the lying by our fine media betters as they screech about Fake News!!!!! is frustrating. Hearing today on Russia “hacking” Dem emails showing their corruption is a spectacle too far. Until Trump is sworn in, I’m not trusting the current crew of Chicago-machine assholes.

Ahh, let’s tube. What we’re seeing lately is either the last, violent, gasp as leftists lose their shit with their power over us or…the last violent gasp as lefties admit, even to themselves, they’re totalitarians and get their Stalin on.

 

The Emperor always nails it.

And therein lies the problem. The Prozis keep shrieking hysterically about Trump being Hitler and how it’s 1933 all over again.

All the while doing every single thing in their power to create the exact conditions that allowed Hitler to come to power.

What the Prozis fail to understand is that every action provokes an equal and opposite reaction. The “art” of using lies and inflammatory nonsense to fire up your own masses lies in doing it just enough that it works, but avoiding carefully to stoke the fires enough that the other side reaches critical mass before you’re ready to handle it. But today’s Prozis, thankfully, don’t understand this. They think that they can get away with committing outrage after outrage, and the other side will just sit around and pick their noses, scratching their balls and shrug until it’s too late.

There’s just so much normal people, those who aren’t freaking out over the community-based-reality, are willing to take and/or there has to be a point where leftists start to act on what they claim to believe and cause a reaction.

 

The Post doesn’t like Trump any more than the NY Times, but they still crack me up. This is an article about the world junior hockey championships where the US team beat Russia.

We hacked Russia’s goalie

Pretty funny headline. We all need to relentlessly make fun of lefties, arguing idiocies with them only gives them what they want. Point and laugh. Sooner or later they’ll leave us alone or jump at our throats so we can legally kick their asses.

 

Speaking of fake news, Global Worming!

Much of the Arctic was extremely cold last month, not “super-hot” as claimed by the Washington Post.

It used to be they’d put a little correction in somewhere a week or three after The Hottest Year Ever!!!!! stories, now, they don’t bother.

As the proofs that global worming is a religious scam are becoming more and more blatant, global  warmmongers keep screeching ever louder trying to shut up anybody who thinks science should involve the scientific method.

 

Speaking of settled science, they’ve found a new organ.

Researchers have classified a brand-new organ inside our bodies, one that’s been hiding in plain sight in our digestive system this whole time.

It’s sort of apropos of our times they’ve found a new place where shit comes from.

 

We all know Trump is going to be the Cause Of All The Problems In The World!!!!, but before that drumbeat starts let’s look at the wars Obama has us involved in. Not all the wars in the world, just the ones Mr. Peace Prize has gotten us into.

Afghanistan, the ‘Good War’ we’re ‘fighting’ in as half-assed a way as it’s possible for the American military to act.

Iraq, where he declared victory and, against all sane advice, left it for Iran to take over, we’re back defending Iran’s interests.

Syria, where we’re fighting on the side of the Assad, Iranian puppet who pissed on Obama’s red line, and Tsar Putin I.

Libya, where Obama and Hillary decided we needed more chaos.

The Philippines is unhappy with us and getting friendly with China.

Who we’ll probably be fighting in the South China Sea (so long as they start their war after Obama leaves office) because of Obama’s fecklessness.

Eastern Europe where we’ll be fighting with Russia, we’re allied with them in Syria.

And let’s not forget the Horn of Africa.

We be boned, and it’s all Trump’s fault. That’s what’s going to piss me off the most, being forced to defend Trump. Sonomabatch.

 

This one makes me laugh my ass off but leaves me with a question. Philly, in a virtue-signaling event, raised taxes on soda drastically while claiming it would only be a “few pennies”, For The Children! of course.

petard

 Last week this purchase came to $6.47. Today it is $9.75.

 

Is that ‘hoist on your own petard‘ or ‘hoist on your own retard‘? Eh, either way it’s hilarious, I can’t wait for the  gang-wars over soda-smuggling turf.

 

Let’s end on three chucklers.

When I found out this was actually the BBC doing this, I laughed even harder. The Real Housewives of Isis. Pretty funny.

 

Duffel Blog, which is like the Onion for the military, has been pretty consistently funny lately. Here, they milsplain US military heraldry.

 

Aviation: A tampon nailed to a pair of yellow wings….

Air Defense Artillery: The crossed cannon represent the field which all Air Defenders wish they had assessed into, namely Artillery. Over the cannon is the hallowed “Finned Dildo,” or as Air Defenders privately refer to it, the “Homewrecker,” which reminds all Air Defenders that they will spend their entire career being sodomized like a particularly sexy fish. Like a Moorish Idol for instance. Mmmm, I could fuck a Moorish Idol all day long….

Logistics Corps: A golden ship’s wheel to represent buggery…

 

 

Very darn funny. Their articles on Mattis have been highlarious.

Hundreds of Marines tasked with training and advising Iraqi Army forces have been medically evacuated from the battlefield this week after being overcome by massive moto-boners.

The medical emergency followed the announcement that retired Marine Gen. James Mattis had been officially nominated for Secretary of Defense.

Cracks me up.

 

And now the funniest damn thing I saw today. Bar non. Funnier even than Marines trying to figure out the order of succession (or, who has to die for Mattis to become POTUS).

On Wednesday, President Obama added another prestigious medal to his Nobel Prize collection when he had Defense Secretary Ash Carter award him with the Department of Defense Medal for Distinguished Public Service.

 

Narcissus was a piker.

Is it even worserer than we thought?

This one could be huge. No, YUGE!!!!!!!!

Via Cold Fury, we see this from the alt-right that Hillary! named as an Emmanuel Goldstein.

The set-up.

Over the next few days many new documents will be released. The contents of these documents will contain evidence of perhaps the largest coverup in American History….

The new leaks being released this week will provide documents in the form of emails, pictures, and videos….

We believe these pictures and videos were taken… to make sure all participants followed through on a previously agreed agenda.

 

The part that’s fucking huge.

they would soon know he was the one who released him to us.

We tried to make arrangements for him to exit the country safely, but he was killed before those arrangements could be carried out…

We will not only be releasing these documents, but we have multiple memebers of the FBI, CIA, and NYBD who will be publicly verifying their authenticity once their safety is assured.

This hack has not come from Russia or anyone else they may try to blame this on. This is a leak from Americas own Government Officials who fear for their safety had the opposed them directly due to reasons that will be made clear soon.

Wow. If true, Monday is gonna be oh so entertaining.

RTWT, there are some seriously disturbing things in it, like a 2-star general committing suicide right before he gets his 3rd star.

 

Related, I hadn’t even thought of this, in light of the FBI’s investigation of the Clinton Foundation:

This casts the informal meeting last summer on an airplane between Bill Clinton and Loretta Lynch in an even worse light than before. As one reader puts it:
It would seem rather inappropriate [for Attorney General Lynch] to be meeting with someone without staff if the person is not just the husband of a subject of an FBI investigation, but actually a subject (or head of a subject) under FBI investigation.

Now that meeting makes much more sense and much worse. I can see Bill getting all angry and telling her she better stop that investigation.

 

This is only funny cuz it shows how stupid your average jihadi is. Recall the bunch of Saudis who only wanted to learn how to fly and land jets.

Recruitment offices across the country have reported “individual inquiries from applicants who are eager to join the Bundeswehr [the German military] for only a few months and are explicitly interested in intensive weapons and equipment training,”

Seriously. Jihadis asking the German army to teach them how to kill.

See, they could have stayed in Syria and Obama would have our special forces guys teach them that shit.

Dumb ass jihadis.

 

Via Bearing Arms, we see this bit of hilarity about an armed robber being shot and killed by his intended victim, who had a legal gun.  The parents of the armed robber are upset.

“Why in the hell did this guy have a gun?” questioned Hairston about the employee who shot her son.

 

That’s Clinton-level chutzpah, their son brought a gun to a robbery and they’re upset he got shot.

 

Let’s go to poo!

When last we looked at Spain, were looking at a town overrun with dog-poo that had their giant, inflatable merde stolen,  now we have another Spanish town apparently covered in dog-poo going a different route.

City officials in Mislata, a municipality in Valencia, Spain, are creating a doggie DNA database…

The idea is to use the database when a dog owner fails to pick up their pet’s excrement on the sidewalk to track down the turd scofflaw.

 

Turd-scofflaw! I love it. If you go to Spain, watch where you’re walking.

 

I gotta admit, I don’t see the discrimination in this.

The court system in Logan County has seen a pile of court cases accumulate in which people are accused of violating a local ordinance in Auburn requiring large animals to wear collection bags to catch their droppings….

It’s being clearly designed to single out the Amish and, frankly, to discriminate against the Amish,”

 

I’d say it’s targeted at Amish horses, not Amish. The article doesn’t mention it, so I’m gonna assume most, if not all, the people using horses on public roads in the area are Amish.

While horse-related, my Caballero (which is running great!) and my Mustang do not drop doo behind me. Just rubber.

 

This is really some shit.

 

Look how the Clinton campaign dude manslpains to the reporterettes what they should ask.

 

Now this is some dumb shit.

 

Womb-envy.

More like vagina/boob envy.

Men don’t have them so we want to play with them as often as possible.

It’s become pretty darn crazy out there.

First up, the Et Tu Minitrue? section.

Headline fun! from three Minitrue outlets in good standing. These are headlines you’d expect to see at Hannity dot com (if there is such a place).

Hillary Clinton Talks Donald Trump’s Treatment of Women, Doesn’t Dwell on Emails/ABC

To distract from email controversy, Clinton targets Trump’s record with women/CBS

If Dems will rig a debate for Clinton, what won’t they do to win?/ The Hill

Holy moly! That must be driving Hillary! crazy, having Minitrue turn on her. And I bet the Dem leadership ain’t very happy with her destroying their plausible deniability.

 

The pressure is getting to her. And probably all the drugs she has to take to stay upright aren’t helping either.

Hillary! getting upset that stupid Americans just refuse to realize she deserves to be POTUS.

Hillary Clinton raged Tuesday night against a protester at her rally who denounced her husband as a sexual predator.

About three minutes into her 20-minute stump speech, a heckler shouted, “Bill Clinton is a rapist!” as he waved a neon green sign declaring the same statement.

Clinton pointed a finger at the protester.

“I am sick and tired of the negative, dark, divisive, dangerous vision and the anger of people who support Donald Trump,” Clinton shouted at her Fort Lauderdale, Fla., rally.

Yup, she prefers negative, dark, divisive and dangerous anger at the people who support Trump.

Here we have Hillary! claiming to be in NYC on 9/11.

She was probably jogging with Chelsea.

 

This crazy is awesome.

Two men arrested last week in southern Georgia were planning to attack an aurora research facility owned by the University of Alaska Fairbanks around which conspiracy theories of mind control have long swirled, investigators said….

both men confessed “that God told them to go and blow this machine up that kept souls, so souls could be released.”

In their defense, the History Channel had a show where some some scientists said that could be where the Clintons keep the souls they collect.

Well, there or Oak Island but those two guys didn’t have a boat so….

 

This is somewhat cool, to me. YMMV.

Grim London is an interactive map of London with various things hauntings, murders, “just grim” and prostitution. Seriously. They list old ads for prostitutes that are pretty funny.

Harriet’s List of Covent Garden Ladies…. the pocket guide to London’s prostitutes….for just one guinea, a man could be enjoying the company of Mss Gr-n at…

Heh. I wish I knew what a guinea was. Is it more or less than a ‘quid’?

 

We are not afraid enough of the Japanese.

A new brand of chocolates manufactured by the Mme KIKI company will be hitting the shelves next year in Japan in the form of women’s nipples.,,

The CHOCONIP set of chocolates has been inspired by the Jison-in Temple…

The picture below shows the worshipping of nipples at the Jison-in Temple…

 

Seriously. I can’t figure out if that’s awesome, creepy or what.

 

It’s Game 7 of the World Series tonight.

Repent your sins. The end is nigh!

So what do you think, asteroid? Zombie virus? Obama declaring that the elections won’t happen? Donald Trump saying it was all a joke and he’s not really running? Alien invasion?

The suspense is killing me.

When is it all going to come crashing down?

I just want to get a post in before game 6 tonight. If Cleveland wins, we’re doomed. If Chicago wins, the doom is delayed but I can’t count on that.

Let’s set some mood music.

 

Now to go back in time in a non-musical way.

I was looking for something else and found this post, from 4/2011 by some dude who doesn’t have anything to do with this blog anymore, titled:

Trump stands as warning GOPers need to grow a fucking pair

They didn’t grow a pair and here we are.

Matt Lewis has this exactly right, the biggest reason Trump can talk about making a serious run without being laughed out of the room is because he’s the only one getting really aggro against Obama

Now he’s the only one aggro against the whole We’re Better And Smarter Than You party.

At least, I assume he is. I’m not really sure what “aggro” means. Probably some 80s music slang.

With this disclaimer that so many of us understand.

…I’m just noting this is what fucking happens when the GOP leadership becomes what it has become.

Yup. And they spent 4 years getting worse and worse so here we are.

Voting for Trump.

 

I’ll take that dare.

For fans of candy corn…  that puts the potentially lethal dose at 1,627 pieces,

If you don’t hear from me, they were right.

 

Via xbradtc we see this bit of hilarity.

What do we have here?” said Gerald Brooks, greeting another group of costumed trick-or-treaters. “A princess, a werewolf, and — oh. Out-fucking-standing. More imitation soldiers.”…

No Snickers for you, Jarhead. Now get the hell off my porch.”…

“This is a travesty,” Brooks fumed after the children left. “I haven’t seen a single costume that’s AR 670-1 compliant…

 

RTWT, it’s a hoot. It stays funny throughout and ends on some darn good funny. Especially read the quotes comments, the first one out of the blocks gets the Dan Rather Award For Clueless Credulity.

 

So you have a pet alligator. You’d think you could work out some costume that incorporated your pet alligator. But not if you’re this type of crazy.

By “treats”, I assume he means, “Trick or treaters”.

 

Let’s end on another bit of Twitter Win!

I might have to start playing.

Seriously, we just had a huge revelation and nobody knows why or where it’s going and our fine media betters are totally not interested in figuring it out or letting anybody know if they do.
I switched to Foxnews this morning and saw them talking about Trump taking advantage of what Comey did, no mention of Hillary!, I switched to CNN and they were talking about Trump taking advantage of what Comey did with no mention of Hillary!’s felonious behavior.

Let’s see what the hell is going on.

Mark Steyn has some ideas in his article titled Occam’s Weiner, which makes sense. Dicks should not be multiplied unnecessarily.

So in the final week of the campaign the plot twists arrange themselves in a remarkably straightforward manner. The FBI isinvestigating the Clinton Foundation – because it’s a criminal enterprise: if you give a million bucks to the the Clintons’ charity, sixty grand goes to charity and the remaining 940,000 goes to fund the lifestyles of Bill, Hillary, Chelsea and their various malodorous associates – Sid Blumenthal, Terry McAuliffe, etc.

Too bad none of our fine media betters are interested. I could go on for 400 words about it, but I’ll save 600 by posting this.

turnabout-is-foul-play

But Trump is going to start a nuclear war!!!!

According to a new poll conducted by the independent Levada Center pollster, almost half of Russians (48 percent) fear worsening relations with the West over Syria could lead to a third world war.

It’s funny how Obama is the greatest POTUS in the history of ever and yet, he’s not responsible for anything that’s happened during his terms while  his Sec State who was all-in on the idiocy of US OUT OF EVERYWHERE!!!!!! is totally EXPERIENCED!!!!!!

Just not ‘funny ha-ha’.

Little bit of child abuse as abusers abuse their son.

this-is-the-end

Well, child abuse unless he self-identifies as a felon.

I’ll field this one.

selling-america

The product they were selling was American power and prestige. To people who hate us, like the murderous dictators in Russia and China for instance.

As an aside, I didn’t realize Trump was Jake Busey’s father.

 

Let’s take a break from the endy of our civilization to focus on the funny…..err farce.

Hillary Clinton was resting, running out the clock, sitting on a supposed large lead, and hoping that the election was sooner than later. Now after the latest Weiner disclosures, she is crisscrossing the country, terrified of collapsing polls, and wishing that she had three more weeks rather than just one. With the Clintons, farce is the desert to scandal: the profiteering Clinton Foundation as a humanitarian treasure; Hillary the former corporate attorney as child and little-guy crusader; Bill Clinton, both sexual predator and feminist hero….

Yet no one thought discredited deviant Anthony Weiner could much harm Hillary—except of course “conspiratorial” Donald Trump.

RTWT, it’s equal parts fendy and fundy.

Not to brag, but I write a lot of the same stuff VDH does, I’m just angrier and foul-mouthed.

 

Coupla pics that illustrate our current election.

vote-trump

I saw this ad all over the place on the ‘tubes a week or two ago, I assume cuz I’m in AZ as I didn’t see anybody else noticing it.

wtf-mccain

He does realize AZ is still part of America, doesn’t he? I do know I’m not voting for him. I’ll vote in most races (cuz I’m a racist, duh), but I don’t want to encourage him so he can do without my support.

I’m thinking of turning in my Gadsden flag.

bender-gadsden

Pasty white is shiny, right?

 

The NY Post has been all over Trump stuff, but they still go after Hillary! and Obama.

In March 2015, Obama made the ridiculous claim that he had learned about Clinton’s e-mail server “the same time everybody else learned it, through news reports.” In fact, not only did he know she was using a private e-mail address for state business, but he had corresponded with her via that address.

But anybody who even so much as implied Obama was lying when he said that was called all kinds of names.

 

A campaign ad I can get behind.

 

I’d love to see the Clinton’s version of that. Opening shot, Bill Clinton beating off to Big Uns magazine. He looks at the camera and says”Vote for Hillary! so I can get back to boning interns.”

 

Instant Karma!

Police say 22 people were injured in a passenger car crash after a NASCAR race.

Most of them were probably hoping for a crash, just not one they were involved in.

 

This is karma, just not instant.

The university that has repeatedly defended the practice of affirmative action before the Supreme Court called a mock bake sale in which the prices of goods varied by the race of the customer “inflammatory and demeaning.”

Introspection is just so passe.

 

Speaking Funniest End Of Civilization Ever wise, what happens if we do nuclearly destroy ourselves?

Two things.

sparlky

And

galaxy

 

In a thousand or a million years, the Earth is back to ‘normal’. I just hope future cockroach archaeologists dig up my bones and put them in their version of the British Museum.

 

Except you’re wrong.

Major Victory Over IRS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the court picked up where the D.C. Circuit left off, and ordered that the IRS cease delaying determinations on any outstanding tax-exempt applications of Tea Party groups and other grassroots organizations. He gave the IRS thirty days to comply.

OOooooohhhhhh!!!!!! 30 Days!!!!!!!!! Who’s gonna enforce that order? The “Justice” Dept? The A-Team? Santy Claus?

Totally unrelated, Day 1258 in the IRS “Scandal” (if a scandal happens in the forest and all of our betters ignore it, did it really happen?)

 

This one is all about not paying attention.

But confidently predicting how his (Trump’s V) mere election would affect markets or the economy is impossible — and risks further undermining economists’ already shaky reputation with the public.

Of course a Trump will cause all manner of bad things to happen in the economy. Minitrue will suddenly report on the shit they’ve been ignoring for 7 years of Recovery Summer!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

 

FBI Agents totes upset!!!!!!

FBI agents say the bureau is alarmed over Director James Comey deciding not to suggest that the Justice Department prosecute Hillary Clinton…
We talk about it in the office and don’t know how Comey can keep going.”

I’ll tell you how he keeps going, because Hillary!’s Bitches in the FBI ain’t doing shit about their bureau simultaneously pissing, shitting and dancing on the rule of law.

 

Dire warnings

In Democratic circles, the talk about the presidential election has increasingly turned to fears of a violent uprising by white supremacists and neo-Nazis if Donald Trump loses.

I’d suggest it’s more like Hillary!’s Bitches in the FBI and all the bureaucratic SWAT teams will have to respond to what our fine Minitrue betters will be calling a violent uprising. No more Tea Party protests for you! The only protests allowed will be when violent lefties get their destruction on.

 

I agree, Polie-ico lies. It’s what they do.

WikiLeaks-BUSTED Politico(sic) journo doubles down with this lame denial

But why act so surprised? Seriously, it’s like acting surprised that Clintons lie.

 

The next don’t really really go along with the rest.

This is more of an I Wuz Right! thing

According to an NBC insider, “Trump was leading in the polls, so the tape was leaked to derail his bid.”

The insider added the leak was sanctioned by NBC News top brass, and in the process, “NBC handed over the scoop of the year to WaPo, just to help Hillary.”

I was reading tea leaves and figured Trump was doing better than I thought.

 

As a sequel to Megyn Kelly losing to Rachel Maddow (which we see she still is), we see the only one not hatin’ on Trump, Hannity, winning the ratings wars. The top of the list.

O’Reilly   2.231   Kelly: 2.104    Maddow:  2.136    Hannity: 2.471

 

That’s tea leaves, but should I read them?

 

Okay, this one is funny. A nasty, nearly nekkid statue of Hillary! in NYC was destroyed by some hateful cow who actually said, “I can do whatever I want!!!!” then she sits on the statue of the golden cow. There’s video at the link that shows it.

My problem with the statue, look at the hooves. No cankles! That’s like Trump without the hair.

 

 

 

I will say it’s hilarious that Minitrue is pushing all these decade(s) old accusation that nobody mentioned before.

i-believe-him

My personal favorite is Winstette Smith at People who kept it quiet for so long, poor girl suffering in silence for all these years. Too bad she didn’t have some sort of outlet for publishing her bullshit….totally true accusations before. It’s must have been especially frustrating for her since tabloids like People have never discussed Trump much.

An artist’s rendition of if Bill were a baboon.

menage-trois

 

Now we’ll go with sideburns.

No, we’ll go with SIDEBURNS!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Proving that not everybody in the 70s had porn star facial hair. Although…that was just 1970 so more of a 60s thing. That does make me wish I could grow facial hair.

 

I’m gonna have to decry the homophobia in this one.

hillary-the-dike

I’m pretty sure he just called Hillary! a dyke.

The “Justice” Dept. has their own version of the Constitution.

redacted

 

It’s not fair confusing this poor girl.

confusion

 

A question.

Which is more disturbing.

This disturbing

or this oh-no

Yeah, I know. That’s ‘below the fold’ stuff. Sorry.

 

Speaking of Hugh Jass and trouser trout, Rutgers is having a new graffiti crisis! No, not the great Trump Chalkening, but Mr. Dick Butt!

speak-only-when-spoken-to

With this utterly hilarious quote

“Rutgers has such a huge name and the University needs to stay up to its name.”

First, is that how Rutgers students speak? “a huge name”? Rutgers is actually a fairly small name for a university. As to “stay up to its name”, how about ‘live up to its name’? That’s so close to intelligent speech it’s scary. You know, if you’re paying tuition of In-state: $31,733 Out-of-state: $47,384 to go there.

Rutgers, of course, is where they  ensmallened their name by telling their students to only speak when “necessary” and where the students protested Condi Rice  while the university paid that Snooki thing, from Jersey Shore, $32K to speak so having them speak like a Jersey Shore-ite should be expected.

I will say that Mr. Dick Butt is ‘necessary’ speech.

 

Whodathunk that toads could be scarier than creepy clowns.

 

I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to sleep if that was on top of my house.

We interrupt this post for a Hillary! campaign ad

She’s changed!

 

I’m going to hell for so many reasons, let’s just add one to the pile.

wine-pong

The best (worst?) part? You’ll never run out of wine with Him on your team.

If Hillary! wins

wut

I’m not sure what that huge, honking pistol in the middle is, but I want one.

 

 

Do you know what today is? It’s one of the greatest holy days in the American calendar! National No Bra Day!

Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaans!

caaaaaaaans

 

Good tit, bad tit, I’m the one with the tongue.

 

Keeping with the Star Trek theme, let’s end on something that our fine social, moral, political and intellectual betters will never understand.

But Shatner gets us!