Restoring My Faith In TFEOCE

Posted: August 31, 2012 by veeshir in Funniest End of Civilization Evah

I was starting to worry about losing the funny and just getting all endy out, but it appears it’ll be hilarious right up until after we’re all eaten by alien clowns and killer tomatoes.

So let’s do a Round the Tubes, Teh Funny/Stream Of Consciousness edition.

I’ll start with Slow Joe cuz it’s really not all that fair, but it’s pretty darn funny.

From all the foo-for-raw over Joe talking about chains, he also said,

Look at what they value and look at their budget and what they’re proposing.

Yup, look what the Dems value and look at their budget. No values, no budget.

That’s not mine, I saw that from Iowahawk following a link at Ace’s to a creepy sand sculpture of our God-President.

So when I clicked on Iowahawk I followed a Daily Caller link with this pic.

You have to love that with that caption. That’s how he paid homage to Neil Armstrong on his passing. Narcissus was a slacker.

Which leads us to Iowahawk, the man, the myth, the legend. As always, he’s pitch perfect. He found an earlier version of the speech that was lost when TOTUS shorted out I guess.

Neil’s passing gives all of us all pause to consider deeper questions. What does it mean for the future of space exploration? How proud would Neil have been to have a famous historic president refer to him by first name? And, most importantly, how did his death inspire that historic president to make ever more gigantic leaps for mankind?

And then it gets funny.

Somewhere following those links I saw something about Romney talking about going to Louisiana to tour the flooded areas and then Obama deciding to go a few hours later.

Romney is really trying to get me to like him. I mean, that’s perfect. That’s so perfect I can’t believe he did it. Is Karl Rove’s evil twin working for Romney?

So we have President Present who doesn’t want to interrupt his fundraising to deal with a bunch of flooded rednecks and we have Romney who’s “just trying to make sure people know about how bad it is down here and maybe see about getting them some help.”

So how is Minitrue going to handle this? Glad you asked.

ABCNews actually played it straight, I’m impressed.

In a last-minute change of plans, Mitt Romney will head to visit storm-affected areas in New Orleans today, skipping a previously scheduled joint rally with running mate Paul Ryan in the battleground state of Virginia this afternoon.

Then we have others. Like, oh, say, US News and World Report


Romney starts campaign visiting storm victims

Nice and fair.  Especially considering the previous quote, go back and read it, I’ll wait.

This bit made me laugh.

Residents stood in the water and watched the motorcade pass.

Probably splashing mud on their Sunday-Go-To-Meeting Suits.

Gotta get a quote from a yokel,

“He just told me to, um, there’s assistance out there,” Chiarello said of her conversation with Romney. Asked what she thought of the Republican nominee, she said: “He’s good. He’ll do the best for us, you know. He speaks to our best interests at heart.”

He done sed sumpin but I ain’t got much o’ that there book-learnin’ but he sure is purty.

It’s gets funnier, I like this bit too, a mini-fisking. My comments are italics.

Back in Washington, Democrats seized on the trip to accuse Republicans of supporting cuts in federal disaster funding that the Gulf Coast will now need to recover from Isaac. (and you’re here to help them get the word out)

Earlier this year, Rep. Paul Ryan — Romney’s running mate and chairman of the House Budget Committee — proposed eliminating $10 billion a year in disaster spending and requiring Congress to pay for emergencies by cutting from elsewhere in the budget. (he doesn’t care if you all die) That proposal was blocked by GOP leaders. (see? he’s even to0 radical for the GOP!!!)

That’s pretty darn funny.

Let’s bring it home with one more Obama campaign ad

It is the height of hypocrisy for Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan to make a pretense of showing sympathy for the victims of Hurricane Isaac when their policies would leave those affected by this disaster stranded and on their own,” said Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., in a written statement.

With a bwa and a ha and a ha, ha, ha.

So what did we learn today? Not a God Damn Thing, but we got a laugh, and that’s really all we can hope for these days.

  1. aliceaitch says:

    It makes perfect sense that Romney would tour. The cleanup’s going to take a long time, and he’ll be president for most of it.

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